While it’s true sports analogies are cheap, Super Bowl 45 (pardon me: XLV) is irresistible as a metaphor for American politics even though it’s anything but cheap.

To a large degree it is another bauble for the charmed lives of the obscenely wealthy, who lord over the masses below in their owners’ boxes of luxury. They are handed anything they want. Just look at Alex Rodriguez and Cameron “Feedy Bird” Diaz as so many millions already have

It’s not difficult to imagine a new Cialis ad: “It can happen at any moment”, the announcer intones. Onscreen, we see a campaign debate between Mr. and Ms. contenders. The woman looks meaningfully at the guy and shrieks “MAN UP!!”. Maybe that’s the inspiration for the “Man Up” mantra we’re suddenly hearing from so many candidates, who are giving new meaning to the word “hardline”. It’s almost, but not quite always, women, and usually Republican.

Note to Dan Brown: You really should write a novel about this year’s election. It’s got everything you need and more: intrigue, treachery, even witchcraft. But most important for you, it has a secret society.

Enough with Facebook and Twitter. I admit that I use them; they’re good business billboards. But people, I just don’t care if you got a tatt, or how proud you are that your kid won the spelling bee, or even if your kid got a tatt. I really don’t. Let’s face it: Social media are quickly becoming passe, sort of like anything “green” or “organic.”

The time has come for anti-social media. It’s time for ” Hellbook.”