Today the Internet yielded a fantastical, magical heretofore-mostly-unknown discovery: the Michael Jordan Twitter feed. Is it really Michael Jordan? Surely not, as it is unverified and has been around for almost two years. Is it hilarious? Pretty much, yeah — which leaves us shaking our heads as to how it has been around for almost two years without completely blowing up.

The Oscars are over, the final ballot counted and final award given. But we know the Oscar voting results you’re really looking forward to haven’t been announced yet: ours! That’s right, after receiving an impressive 100 submissions, we’re here to announce who’s taking home our top prize. And the mittens go to…