Gearing up for bad Cinco de Mayo decisions today? You have two options: one, read this now and consider it a cautionary tale whilst pursuing your own CDM hijinks later, or two, come back to this circa your hangover tomorrow and take comfort in a little commiseration.
We tapped some of our favorite chefs for their craziest Cinco de Mayo stories, and, as you can imagine, more than one of them were tricky to extract. Protips from the pros: avoid peach cocktail, keep your clothes on, don’t say Happy Cinco de Mayo in Mexico, and if anyone ever asks you what your craziest CDM story is, feign innocence.
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When not feeding
Cameron Diaz popcorn at the Super Bowl and/or being on the disabled list, A-Rod made campaign donations to Republicans like . Rudy Giuliani and George W. Bush
The legendary Pittsburgh Penguins star and ex-Canadian is
a registered Republican who has donated money to former Pennsylvania Senator Rick Santorum.
The "Golden Bear" has given
thousands of dollars in political donations to the Republican National Committee, as well as multiple Republican candidates including Arizona Congressman . Ben Quayle
The Tennessee Titans' quarterback and brother-in-law of
The View co-host Elisabeth Hasselbeck gave President . George W. Bush a No. 43 jersey with his name on it at a $1,000-a-plate fundraiser
This Olympic gold medalist proudly endorsed
George W. Bush in 2004 and appeared with Mary Lou Retton at the Republican National Convention.
Tennis legend Sampras is a devout Republican, and
told TMZ in 2008 that he was fed up with Tina Fey pushing her liberal beliefs on people, later screaming, "Go McCain!"
This Super Bowl-winning Dallas Cowboys quarterback has donated to both
John McCain and George W. Bush's presidential campaigns.
Retired Portland Trailblazers basketball star
Clyde "The Glide" Drexler donated $2,000 dollars to George W. Bush's re-election campaign in 2004.
Cal Ripken Jr.
Baseball's "Iron Man" sports both the all-time consecutive games-played record and the distinction of being
nearly drafted to run for Governor of Maryland by the state's GOP.
Perennial all-star Miami Dolphins quarterback (and bit character from
Ace Ventura) Dan Marino donated to George W. Bush's re-election campaign in 2004.
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