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Weekly World News Rubs It In: New Article Replaces Fox & Friends Hosts With Chimps

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» 59 comments

The Weekly World News is relishing in the fact that Fox & Friends believed and reported on their LAPD billion dollar jetpack plan story.

Today they have a breaking report about the hosts of the show being replaced by chimps.

From Batboy, I mean, Frank Lake:

Fox & Friends is going bananas! Out go the monkeys, in come the chimps.

Why did Fox News toss aside their morning hosts like a used banana peel?

Jetpacks.

The hosts of Fox News morning show, Fox & Friends, reported that Los Angeles is going to spend $1 billion on jetpacks that can fly a person up to 63 miles per hour and soar to heights of 8,000 feet.

You see, WWN didn’t report they got fired and replaced by chimps because the story was a joke and false – they said the hosts didn’t give the proper “credit for the story” to WWN.

The author also is up on the rest of the cable news world. “Ailes wanted to hire Rick Sanchez to host Fox & Friends, but realized that Sanchez doesn’t have friends anymore,” wrote Lake.

Don’t worry about the the now former hosts of F&F though (as if you were worried, ok this is getting ridiculous). “Kilmeade, Doocy and Carlson are still hosting their show in the backyard of Doocy’s New Jersey home,” the article says.

How can we make this more meta? Maybe if Fox & Friends starts their show tomorrow with a bunch of chimps sitting in.

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  • Big Eddie

    Don’t monkey with success .

  • The Real Royal King

    It could only be an improvement.

  • Big Eddie

    Gretchen is the gorilla Big Eddie’s dreams .

  • Gasket

    The chimps are definitely an upgrade!

  • Iris

    of course if the fox and freaks chimps did look like that the
    right wing contingent hee would still be APE SHIT for them
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  • writer

    Damn good thing all of the hosts are white, or this would have gone from a joke to a national outrage.

  • right-is-wrong

    Steve you should have a link to the story.

    HILARIOUS

    After doing a story about glazed donuts and how terrorists were using them to make people in New York City constipated, the hosts spent a half-hour talking about the jetpacks. Their reportage was filled with gaping holes including Kilmeade making a wild claim about LAPD Helicopters.

    To promote the new show with the three chimp hosts, Fox is bringing out the heavy guns this morning to sit on the Fox & Friends’ couch. Bill O’Reilly will discuss his new book, Foxes on Fox, Sean Hannity will be discussing President Obama’s bathing habits and Glenn Beck will explain to the chimps how evolution is nothing but a Progressive plot to take money and freedom away from all human beings – even the ones on Mars.

    Ailes did a test show with the three chimps in front of a live audience. “The audience couldn’t tell the difference. The audience thought the chimps had more intelligent things to say than Doocy, Kilmeade and Carlson – combined,” said Ailes.

  • Iris

    whiter you’re right it s a damn good thing all the hosts ae white cause
    if they weren’t they would have been “let go” for having teh stoopid so bad!!

  • writer

    Don’t worry, Iris. Mocking white people is politically correct.

  • The Real Royal Queen

    The Real Royal King said:
    It could only be an improvement.

    I could use a little improvement myself…I’m off to the Beauty Parlor for a makeover. Wish me luck. See ya’ when I get home KingyPoo.

  • writer

    Beauty parlor? Queen, you don’t need it!

  • The Real Royal Queen

    writer said:
    Beauty parlor? Queen, you don’t need it!

    I must look good for my KingyPoo so his eyes won’t stray.

  • Big Eddie

    The Real Royal Queen said:
    I could use a little improvement myself…I’m off to the Beauty Parlor for a makeover. Wish me luck. See ya’ when I get home KingyPoo.

    Just get an estimate .

  • SpineCrusher

    Sneak preview of tomorrow’s F&F show!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVE60zwXx1k

    That’s Doocy interviewing O’Reilly.

  • SpineCrusher

    Got the link from my good buddy Paladino!

  • writer

    You do have a good looking man there, Queen. He’s so good looking, his eyes can’t stop watching each other.

  • Iris

    You got it goin on King, michelle and her identities have such a thing for you!
    She always makes sure you get the most thumbs down too!!

  • writer

    Iris, we’re not laughing with him, we’re laughing at him.

  • LibertySister

    writer said:
    Damn good thing all of the hosts are white, or this would have gone from a joke to a national outrage.

    You are so right!
    Just watch any commercial or sitcom now on TV… Its always the white person who is the complete idiot while the way cool black person rolls there eyes. How does this improve race relations when now the media is on purpose doing this?

  • Iris

    Why writer, bless your heart, thanks for letting everyone know you too are one of michellef’s identities
    Seems like there would be hardly any right wing comments here if it wasn’t for MichelleF

  • writer

    Now Iris, that would hurt if I cared what you thought.

  • tgk

    Interesting that every single article on the front page of Mediaite right now is about FNC or their hosts…….

  • Iris

    Now michelle, you know I would never try and hurt your feelings
    as long as i get the same amount of thumbs down as King

  • Iris

    tgk (or michelle, whatever) you are just now noticing that Mediaite is all about promoting the fox?

  • writer

    You’re already doing pretty good, Iris, but to be in the King’s league, you’re really going to have to ramp up the level of arrogance and hatred. Try repeating these: “Beckerhead” “I hate Fox” “Trailer trash” “It’s only 1%”

    Good luck. We’re all pulling for you.

  • shellys_ghost

    oooooooOOOOOooooOoooooOoooooOOOOOOOOOOOoooothumbsOOoooooooooooooo

  • Corvax

    LibertySister said:
    You are so right!
    Just watch any commercial or sitcom now on TV… Its always the white person who is the complete idiot while the way cool black person rolls there eyes. How does this improve race relations when now the media is on purpose doing this?

    They can have the TV portrayals I’ll be content with reality.

  • CosmosDan

    I just hate to see chimps insulted that way.

  • lazzzlo

    Iris said:…..
    teh stoopid so bad!!

    What adult uses “teh”?

    Personally, the geek in me is so into jet-packs. They could be the ultimate hybrid.

    If you are looking for hard news or critical analysis you probably will not be best served on AM cable shows.

    They do the same things that I do…aggregate information…they comment and I distill.

  • Iris

    theres Shelleys Ghost!! I missed you!
    The whole gang is here
    Anybody want to take bets on which one of you gets banned next?!

  • Iris

    Yeah lazz, its only those damn kids that use the teh.
    and why don’t you tell them to get the hell off your lawn while your at it!
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

  • Arkansas Steve

    At least the folks at FOX have never lost the ability to laugh at themselves.
    This is a really important quality for mentally healthy people.

  • tgk

    Iris said:
    tgk (or michelle, whatever) you are just now noticing that Mediaite is all about promoting the fox?

    Huh, not sure what the michelle thing is all about, but I can assure you, you are incorrect. I have been using this screen name and only this one for well over a year on various message boards. Not even sure why you needed to reply as my comment was just an observation. But I would say “promoting” Fox is definitely NOT Mediaite’s purpose.

  • Yoda002

    I think this would be an upgrade for Fox and Friends.

  • chucken

    I thought flying cars would come first even with Geico jacking up the insurance rates.Fox and Friends should have had a producer yell this is stupid and where did this story come from.

  • The Real Royal Queen

    Big Eddie said:
    Just get an estimate .

    How dare you!! Off with his head!

  • Iris

    well,t, its had to tell these days who isn’t our old fiend michelle who was banned fom the site and has now assumed many identities here and shes obsessed with the thumbs up thumbs down thing and will use the identites to give liberal comments lots of thumbs down
    But what the hell she povides lots and lots of laughs

  • The Real Royal Queen

    Iris said:
    Anybody want to take bets on which one of you gets banned next?!

    I bet that it will be me

  • Iris

    Not you Queen!!! NO!!
    though i might put a couple of bucks on it

  • lazzzlo

    Iris said:
    Yeah lazz, its only those damn kids that use the teh.
    and why don’t you tell them to get the hell off your lawn while your at it!
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

    I think you kinda proved “teh” point…

  • The Real Royal Queen

    Iris said:
    Not you Queen!!! NO!!though i might put a couple of bucks on it

    I think I’m ok as long as the Royal King rules the comment section. He says he loves me…but all men say that right before, you know…fun time.

    Sorry for the image that might create.

  • Iris

    proved teh point!
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
    you are so “hip”

  • lazzzlo

    Iris said:
    you are so “hip”

    No I’m not…I use pronouns correctly.

  • The Real Royal King

    tgk said:
    Interesting that every single article on the front page of Mediaite right now is about FNC or their hosts…….

    Michelle-in-Utah, “FNC” is a collective, and the pronoun most be singular. “Its”.

  • The Real Royal King

    Iris said:
    well,t, its had to tell these days who isn’t our old fiend michelle who was banned fom the site and has now assumed many identities here and shes obsessed with the thumbs up thumbs down thing and will use the identites to give liberal comments lots of thumbs downBut what the hell she povides lots and lots of laughs

    Have soccermon and truther been banned, as well? It’s very hard to keep up with.

  • http://gordonbloyershow.com gordonbloyershow

    The Real Royal King said:
    Michelle-in-Utah, “FNC” is a collective, and the pronoun most be singular. “Its”.

    RRK the divorce lawyer is playing grammar police again.

  • lazzzlo

    gordonbloyershow said:
    RRK the divorce lawyer is playing grammar police again.

    That has developed a few degrees off the original!

  • SpineCrusher

    lazzzlo said:
    No I’m not…I use pronouns correctly.

    PWNED by Iris…ROFLMAO!!!

  • SpineCrusher

    gordonbloyershow said:
    RRK the divorce lawyer is playing grammar police again.

    So what does that make you? The police of grammar police?

    I’d run with it Blowhard, much better than your current day job of getting down to the SSI office on your motorized scooter to pick up your Social Security.

    NEXT PLEASE!!!

  • Iris

    King, I don’t know if they have been banned or Michelle just knows that eveyone knows they are her. Besides the comments being a typical Michelle comment, look for whoever has the most thumbs up, she apparently likes giving herself more than others, I guess she thinks that makes her really , really, really , really smart
    You know like how she gives you the most thumbs down

  • lazzzlo

    SpineCrusher said:
    PWNED by Iris…ROFLMAO!!!

    I think that is the whole point….PWNED?

  • lazzzlo

    At some point you actually do have to be clear.

  • lazzzlo

    Did you “own Me”?

  • writer

    You know like how she gives you the most thumbs down

    So that’s why the King always gets so many thumbs down on virtually every post. Michelle is doing it! And there I thought it was because the King is a hate-filled, arrogant prick.

  • lazzzlo

    teh pOwned!

  • Iris

    Of course you want to think that writer but everybody else knows MichelleF has made the thumbs thing so bogus nobody bothers with it but yet she keeps doing it , kinda lets you know how she has nothing better to do with her life :-)

  • writer

    I don’t think I’m the only one thinking that about the King, Iris. It’s kinda self-evident.

  • timcajun

    I need a fake christian to jump in about this Lord Beck 40 day 40 night pitch he is pushing to the sheep! He never gives any details, but has all these weak losers on about how it changed their lives! I am sure a bagger will say I don’t understand, because I don’t get it, but there is nothing to get! Becks standard is to talk in circles, start one direction not end, then starts something different that never ties in to the point. There is no point, just sheep rambles! I need a hate filled clown to explain this, hurry!

  • Tedderman

    Who even noticed? The only difference I can see is that the chimp is cuter than that dumb blond.

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