Out of left field, it’s Alan Simpson with the best clip you’ll see all day. The former Wyoming senator and current co-chairman of President Obama’s deficit commission was on Fox News Monday night, talking about the elderly and Social Security, but he made an epic turn midstream, and ended up on the grandkids and their pop culture. Now don’t be fooled by Simpson’s age and think he’s not fully tapped in to what the kids are listening to. He gets it. Oh, how it gets it. He knows “they’re walking on their pants with the cap on backwards listening to the enema man and Snoopy Snoopy Poop Dogg.”

For the third year in a row, DJ Earworm has created a mashup of the top 25 songs of the year, as determined by Billboard, in his 2010 United States of Pop (Don’t Stop the Pop). Featured: Katy Perry, Ke$ha, Lady Gaga, Beyoncé, Jay-Z, Enrique Iglesias (really? He was back this year?), the Black Eyed Peas, Rihanna, Eminem, and — wait, no Bieber?!? I can’t imagine a 2010 mashup without the Baby hook that I still maintain ripped off “Runaround Sue” (oh look! Proof!).

Learning the steps to the hip-hop dance colloquially known as “the Dougie” is no easy feat, which is why the song from which it originates is titled, “Teach Me How to Dougie.” So while CNN anchor Wolf Blitzer did try his best to learn and perform the dance at last week’s Soul Train Awards, he was largely unsuccessful.

Anderson Cooper returned to his slot as occasional 60 Minutes contributor this week, gaining rare access to award-winning rapper Eminem.

The Detroit native brought the CNN host around his former neighborhood, and taught him the proper way a person can in fact find a rhyme for “orange.”

Anderson Cooper is not a good rapper. He can’t even find a word that rhymes with “orange.” This the latest from his upcoming 60 Minutes interview with popular early-aughts rapper Eminem, who appears to be staging a comeback of sorts whereby he brags about reading the dictionary and mispronouncing words to fit them into his rhyme scheme.

See what I did there? Hot off the Youtubes comes the trailer for “Jersey Shore XXX,” a porn spoof of MTV’s already-self-parodying “Jersey Shore,” and featuring the adventures of characters like “The Predicament.”

I’m too tired to dish out double entendres about stiff competition or how the shoot was hard on the cast, but I do have one observation to make after you watch the nudity-free, but profanity-laced, trailer:

Remember, early on in this innocent decade, when it was a big deal when Bill O’Reilly started criticizing rap music? Now, it seems to happen all the time. For someone opposed to the immorality and hedonism that he sees embraced in rap lyrics, O’Reilly knows how to start a hip-hop-style feud with some of the big names in the industry, including Ludacris, Nas, and Cam’ron. Eight notable beefs between O’Reilly and rappers, starting off with Ludacris (semi-NSFW):

Micheline Maynard — “Micki” to her friends and Twitter followers — is the Detroit-based senior business correspondent for the New York Times covering autos and aviation, and the author of the just-released The Selling of the American Economy: How Foreign Companies are Remaking the American Dream. If you’re wondering if it’s a good book, consider [...]