If you’re a reader of Italy’s Oggi magazine, there’s a good chance you’ll find yourself with a little extra gift with your next magazine purchase. And we’re not talking about a dinky little tin ring or plastic animal figurine or strain of E. coli in your Cracker Jack box: You’ll get a full set of knives! Along with a cover story on Amanda Knox, whom, as you may be aware, was recently declared not guilty of having participated in the stabbing death of her flatmate in Italy.

Um, this is some of the weirdest audio I’ve ever heard: Dude calls the operator to — politely! — report that he’s just been stabbed. Operator: 911 Man: Uh, yes ma’am – would it be possible to send an ambulance here? Operator: What’s going on? Man: Uh, there’s a knife stuck in my chest.