For many small businesses, having a large political event in their area is a good sign– it brings tourists and attention and business to the community. For others, it’s a nuisance, particularly when politicians are involved. That’s what Colby’s Breakfast & Lunch in Portsmouth, New Hampshire decided of the week-long political circus heading their way and, in preparation for the storm, put up a simple and non-negotiable sign: “No politicians, no exceptions.”

KTLA’s Henry DiCarlo has had it with the lack of communications at the LA-based local news outlet and he isn’t afraid to air some dirty laundry on live television. To wit: a recent weather segment appeared to be cut short after he also interviewed some dude…DiCarlo got pissed and basically said as much during a live shot. Related: slow news Thursday!

KBOI TV in Idaho had some technical difficulties with their newscast graphics during their morning show this week, and a producer somehow linked up his audio with the live broadcast, resulting in a couple f-bombs being dropped live on the air.

I see the following clip as a sort of paso doble between a local television reporter and a rather enthusiastic onlooker.

At the beginning of the footage, the reporter, who is busy interviewing a man about shopping at lower Manhattan’s South Street Seaport, all but swats a young man away when he gets too close to her and her interviewee. He, being apparently mesmerized by the camera, doesn’t seem to mind. Undaunted, he tries again, waving happily behind the reporter.

Like many of the Occupy movements across the country, Occupy Boston has been nursing a delicate drug problem on the premises, and as more people get arrested for dealing and taking drugs in the tents, one local news station decided to visit the site and night and find out just how rampant the drug use is. With protesters claiming they are getting a bad reputation for a select few of “bad apples,” WHDH sent a reporter to find drugs, and it didn’t take long for coughing and laughing groups of people within tents to push the reporter away.

The gentleman in this edition of KRON 4 News’ “People Behaving Badly” segment just received a $500 ticket for driving alone in a carpool lane. Most people upon receiving such a hefty fine would merely grumble some profanities at themselves and maybe think about appealing. The star of this instantly viral video? He decided to remind the officer repeatedly that he was a “fat-ass” that didn’t “even have a real job” and couldn’t afford a ticket like that if the tables were turned. Adding to the hilarity of this officer calming taking this barrage or insults, the culprit was wearing a happy-faced Elmo shirt that clashed comically with his mood.

On Friday’s KBAK-KBFX morning show, based in Bakerfield, California, legendary calypso singer Harry Belefonte doze off before an interview, leaving anchor Leyla Santiago to awkwardly ask him to wake up repeatedly.

Winding down on this calm Sunday afternoon, here’s a fun little local news clip for you. Not sure if this was a happy accident or a prank or someone was just testing the graphics. Whatever the case, never have the words “EPIC FAIL” carried with them so much meaning. Watch the video below, courtesy of [...]

Ray Cortopassi is a jerk. No, I’ve never met the anchor for Indianapolis’ Fox59 Morning News and have seen nothing of him except the below clip, but judging solely from that, he is a jerk. A hilarious, hilarious jerk.

In the clip in question, Cortopassi uses a giant tarantula from a segment to sadistically torture poor Jim O’Brien while he’s trying to give his weather report. The arachnophobic weather man eventually makes a bee-line straight for the studio door leaving anchorwoman Angela Ganote to attempt to finish the segment. This lasts for a few seconds until Cortopassi starts scaring her.

The image says it all: WTTG Fox D.C. reporter Tucker Barnes braved the beach at Ocean City, Maryland to give a live report of the wind and water power of Hurricane Irene. Except, unlike most of the unfortunate, courageous reporters out tonight braving the elements, Barnes had to suffer neither rain nor water, but what he called “sea foam,” which Fox later explained was “probably the remnants of raw sewage.”

Congress has been out of session for little more than a week, but it’s never too early for boisterous Town Hall meetings where constituents get a chance to lash out at their representatives for their perceived incompetence. First up this year is Sen. John McCain, who confronted an enraged (but polite) Tea Party member who demanded an apology for the Senator having mocked her movement on the Senate floor during the debt debate. “I am not sorry for what I said,” the Senator replied dryly.

Phoenix ABC affiliate ABC15 decided to get to the bottom of a story involving a man who accidentally shot himself in the groin by, naturally, asking strangers completely unrelated to the story how they felt about it. The answer, shockingly, can be summed up in one word: “Uryghthhhjugh?!”

“I don’t really know what to say about that,” said one man standing in a parking lot, penis presumably intact. “That’s… Wow. I, yeah. I’m baffled right now.”

“Definitely makes me cringe,” said another gentlemen currently in possession of a groin. “Uh, without a doubt. I mean, what man wouldn’t?” Bold words.

A local news reporter in California unfortunately found herself in the news when she was shot at with a BB gun by two teenage boys. During a live report. Leanne Suter, a reporter for KABC-TV, was hit in the hand by a BB gun pellet and was taken to a nearby hospital. Luckily she was not seriously injured.

The funny thing about doing a liveshot is that you always run the risk of missing news while you’re busy reporting the news. When you end up doing your local news liveshot, and you’re telling the anchor and audience about all the reporters who’ve gathered to–maybe–hear from a newsmaker, well, there’s an even bigger chance that the newsmaker might just emerge while you’re all tied up. That happened this week to a News 12 Long Island reporter, and wow if the results aren’t among the funniest few moments of TV you’ll see all week.

Sunny with a chance of cool, romantic breeze and long, flowing blond locks dimly lit in candlelight: this, for some reason, was the local news forecast in the Portland, Oregon metro area this week, as KOIN5′s meteorology department appeared to have been hijacked by Fabio, the romance novel and “I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter” who occasionally pops up on Fox News to warn against the perils of the socialist Obama administration.

It was a quiet night in Philadelphia. The crickets were chirping, the lights were dimming, and police were raiding a local residency housing several dead dogs, a live alligator, and a comatose partridge in a pear tree. (Okay, maybe not that last one.)

With this iconic image comes quite a tale. As the news anchors in the local California Fox News 40 studio said, “it looked like a joke, but really there is a lot more to this story.” Brianna Mooney was just hanging out and minding her own business when she heard Jared Medeiros screaming. She looked out her window and witnessed first hand the image of a man’s flailing legs sticking out from a manhole. “I was like… What?” she told Fox news anchor Tihanna McCleese.

Have you ever heard of sulfur hexafluoride? I hadn’t until I watched the clip below, but I’d now really like to get my hands on some. The clip features a science segment on local 9News in Denver, Colorado. Steve Spangler, science guru, uses his originally titled Steve Spangler Science show to demonstrate to the Denver anchors all the very fun things they should be doing with sulfur hexafluoride, a very heavy gas.

Most cities don’t have politicians who send pictures of their genitalia to porn stars. Very few do; at last count, the number totaled one.

Most cities don’t have a President who gets into debates on policy with foreign leaders; they don’t have internationally recognized music stars; they don’t create fascinating innovative tech companies. Most cities potter along, debating the police department budget or the addition to the zoo or an increase in auto thefts.

Most cities, in other words, are boring.

The cliche about local news liveshots is there’s usually no reason for them. It’s not like there’s anything happening that warrants being live. The liveshot just adds an element of excitement, or so news producers will tell you. And in the case of St. Louis station KSDK, they might be right. On Wednesday, reporter Ann Rubin led the 6 p.m. newscast with a liveshot that was interrupted by breaking news: a car crash that caused Rubin to jump as tires squealed and metal made impact.

The Shake Weight is a phallic exercise object that demands of its users vertical shaking in order to strengthen arm muscle. Using it looks very much like a sex act. Given these two facts, the good folks at KTLA Los Angeles decided the item merited its own segment, where the anchors described their “small white ones,” “big black ones,” and the “technique” that makes size differences irrelevant.

Intrepid reporter Marissa Mike reporting in Palm Springs, California is willing to brave the elements to deliver news to her viewers. Even if it takes over twenty times to get it right and even if she is required to chase around her news hat as the strong winds repeatedly blow it off of her head.

In 2008, the Obama campaign seemed to re-invent modern elections with their success in new media–raising cash, organizing supporters and channeling them to the polls. As President Obama gears up his 2012 re-election campaign, he’s turned back to the tried and true for presidents seeking four more years: TV interviews. Gloria Goodale, writing in The Christian Science Monitor, says it’s notable that the guy who “made his name in new media during the 2008 election cycle, is burnishing some old media tools this time around.”

It’s the kind of story bitter, sarcastic local news writers live for: a molasses truck overturning on a California highway. You know there’s no way you’re getting through the story without somebody–actually, everybody–describing it as a “sticky situation.”

Eight thousand gallons of molasses hit the road, and sure, that “sticky stuff” is indeed “thick as molasses,” as a Sacramento reporter tells us. He adds the “sweet smelling stuff” left drivers caught in the resulting traffic jam “feeling sour.”

Ah, local news: a neverending fountain of stream-of-consciousness obscenity shocking and awing myriad housewives all over the nation. Today’s profane slip-up comes to us from Ohio’s WFMJ, where “Nancy from Sparkle” has a bold and tasteful suggestion for combining sweet and savory: “biscotti does go great with cock.”