Party Advertised On Facebook Crashed By 1,000s

A teenage girl in Germany accidentally invited over 1,000 guests to her party over the weekend when she forgot to mark the event private. The video, just posted yesterday won numerous “Most Viewed” awards internationally, so you can expect to see this video getting more play in the US early this week.

This type of video already has a recent history of viral success.

Last September, when William J. Lashua’s 90th birthday party was advertised publicly on Facebook, Anonymous showered the WWII vet in cards rather than showing up in person.

Over on the Know Your Meme forums, Sprint is coming under scrutiny for using the “surprise birthday flash mob” theme in their “Random Acts Of Togetherness” campaign because of how Anonymous’ sudden coordinated targeting of individuals has been malicious as often as kind.

Weinergate Is Petering Out

The Drudge Report published a story of the weekend asserting that because Weiner’s weiner shot was posted through TweetDeck this was somehow proof that his account wasn’t hacked. Many a right-winger sought to promote the article with claims that the attention on Weiner hadn’t died about, but as one can see from the week’s Twitter volume (courtesy of Trendistic), hardly anyone really seems to care anymore.

Sarah Palin Provides Plenty Of Entertainment

Refusing to back down even when historical facts prove her wrong, Sarah Palin appeared on Fox News asserting that her version of Paul Revere’s Ride was correct.

Meanwhile on Wikipedia, a battle brewed over edits being made to the page on Paul Revere as loyal Palinites attempted to ret-con history to align with the former Alaska Governor’s gaffe.

MTV Movie Awards

MTV honored stars of the silver screen on Sunday, implementing a real-time Twitter tracker to display activity across a number of actors’ names and award categories. From where I sat, the awards show did nothing to raise the already ridiculously high volume of Bieber Tweets.

So far the two breakout moments that seem to be getting the most buzz are both due to Robert Pattinson, first for kissing Taylor Lautner, then for telling the audience he “fucked” Reese Witherspoon.

This Is A Cute Squirrel

Although this photo has been passed around since at least February of this year, it’s experiencing a resurgence in popularity after hitting the Tumblr Radar over the weekend. Your mom will be forwarding this to you in an email some time next month.

Then came Robert Pattinson. He noted that they worked together on his first film, “Vanity Fair,” playing mother and son, but his part ended up being cut from the final version of the film. The second time they worked together was on “Water For Elephants,” in which he played Reese’s love interest. “I didn’t cut you, but I did f*ck you,” Pattinson said, to the delight of the crowd and the probable consternation of the show’s censors. He wrapped up his speech by saying that his time working together with Reese made him realize it was okay to feel sexual chemistry with one’s mother.

Man, Robert Pattinson really is the best thing to happen to the network’s awards show franchise in a long time. He wins every award, always shows up, and now thanks to him they can still claim that the MTV Movie Awards are “edgy!”

Watch the clip via MTV below:

The worthy contenders for the awards show’s highest honor were Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis in “Black Swan,” Emma Watson and Daniel Radcliffe in “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows,” Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart in “Twilight: Eclipse” and Taylor Lautner and Kristen Stewart for the same film, and Ellen Page and Joseph Gordon-Levitt in “Inception.” Unsurprisingly, Stewart and Pattinson took the prize. The two bucked tradition by not opting to kiss each other during their acceptance speech; instead, Pattinson stormed into the audience, passionately smooched Taylor Lautner, and then dragged Kristen Stewart backstage.

Watch the clip via MTV below:

That said I double-taked the other day at this tab on the homepage: Biebz. In addition to “News & Gossip” (the homepage), “Style & Beauty” (actually, that is a pretty great bbq outfit), “Hollyscopes” (apparently my mental energy is a little quieter and more relaxed than usual), “Win!” (summer hair Rx!) and “Pics” (hello, The Situation and your washboard abs), there is also a tab dedicated to Justin Bieber, in all his shaggy Canadian glory:

Here it’s all-Biebz-all-the-the-time, where you can read about how he was with two girls in one weekend (TMI), how Harry Potter heartthrob Daniel Radcliffe thought Bieber was a girl, how his hairstylist spills his shag secrets (unintentional headline entendre, I’m guessing). As they say, “Once you have Bieber Fever, there’s no known cure.”

To be fair, I should note that there is also an “Eclipse” tab – but that’s for a blockbuster movie franchise, not even for R.Patz himself. Does the power of R.Patz pale before the Biebz? To be honest, I never thought of it before. Judging by who gets a super-special tab on Hollywood Life though, I’m gonna say the Biebz could take both the Vamp and the Werewolf, easy – maybe while he was taking two girls in one weekend. Er, perhaps that was an unfortunate turn of phrase.

Let’s clean it up with this headline, which is by far my favorite: “Justin Bieber’s Mom Keeps It Classy and Says She Won’t Pose For Playboy.” Phew! Perhaps Dina Lohan should read this page more often.

Related in “This Exists: Justin Bieber Edition” – CountdownTilJustinBieberTurns18.com. Warning: When you click on it, it will play “Baby,” so be warned lest you suddenly blast it in your office and then have to explain. Upside: Insta dance-party!

From CountdownTilJustinBieberTurns18.com. Get excited – that timeclock is ALREADY out of date!

p.s. Justin Bieber is Canadian.
p.p.s. Geekosystem editor Robert Quigley informs me that this also exists: http://www.buzzfeed.com/biebfeed. It’s pretty funny.
p.p.s. Bieber and his girlfriend, Caitlin Beadles, can be referred to as “Bieber n’ Beadles.” Is it me or does that sound like a store in Diagon Alley?

That was a euphemism. What he actually said: “I really hate vaginas. I’m allergic to vagina.” Happy Valentine’s Day from Robert Pattinson!

Here’s the full quote:

“I really hate vaginas. I’m allergic to vagina. But I can’t say I had no idea, because it was a 12-hour shoot, so you kind of get the picture that these women are going to stay naked after, like, five or six hours. But I wasn’t exactly prepared. I had no idea what to say to these girls. Thank God I was hungover.”

Here’s one of the pictures from the shoot. Warning: May contain vaginas.

Here’s another picture from the shoot. Warning: May also contain vaginas.

Here’s a screenshot from an accompanying video of the shoot. Warning: Here the vagina is very close to his head, but don’t worry, he gets through it.

Here’s a poster from his upcoming film, Remember Me, in which he apparently gets naked. Thankfully, the poster is free of vaginas — unless you count the one on the woman he’s co-starring with. Shhh. He looks so happy here, don’t spoil it.

And here he is in Harry Potter, where probably he wouldn’t have had much contact with vaginas, unless there was something in the Cho Chang storyline I missed.

Oh, I’m sorry, did you miss the vaginas? Here you go. They’re in there somewhere.

Okay so: I know Robert Pattinson is only 24, and I know he’s probably joking around in his arch English way (in the rest of the article he’s clearly having fun, and not shying away from speaking on risque subjects), and it’s pretty clear he did this interview without any handlers, who would have been horrified, but: He probably should have remembered that most of his audience has vaginas, and most of those are tween-to-teenage girls who are maybe already self-conscious about that holiest of holies, as Jules from Pulp Fiction liked to say. He seems like a nice guy from this and his much-tamer more soft-focus (and far less interesting) Vanity Fair interview, and he probably didn’t mean for this to sound misogynistic — though that’s pretty much what the word “misogynist” literally means — but, well, when someone like Robert Pattinson talks about vaginas, the media, the industry, and an army of frenzied teenage girls do listen. And forgive me, people who think that the language police should just ease up and let carefree young superstars say whatever they want to magazines, but I do think that saying baldly (ha) “I really hate vaginas” is actually pretty misogynistic. I’m sure Megan Fox would have something to say about it.

There is more in the interview, but that’s for the Gossip Cop to parse — is he really not dating Kristen Stewart? (Details scribe Jenny Lumet does not ask, and Pattinson does not mention, but it is suggested in his comment that “The only emotional connection of relevance is with my dog”). More broadly, though, this interview is a good reminders that magazines are still in a position to hire good writers with good interview skills with the budget to get the good stuff out of their subjects, plus the money to hire models to pose nakedly with them clad in black gloves and a hauteur that suggest that they are not, in fact, naked. Perhaps, dear reader, that’s the best V-Day gift of all.

Now please enjoy this sexy Robert Pattinson video.

Robert Pattinson On Life Beyond Twilight* [Details]
Photogallery By Norma Jean Roy [Details]
Can You Be Allergic To Vaginas? [Gawker]

*Alternate title: Robert Pattinson: Vagina-Free And Loving It

Watch at here.

The performances are beautiful but the stories told are truly tragic, and harrowing — what Wyclef Jean had to say about what he’s been doing in Haiti, moving rubble and burying friends, should quell some of the noise about his Yele Haiti finances, for a bit at least — but for now, this is about people putting all that (even that line between journalist and advocate and celebrity) behind in order to come together to make a difference.

How to make it:

There are many ways viewers can contribute to the telethon. Donations can be made online at HopeForHaitiNow.org, over the phone by calling (877) 99-HAITI, by texting the word “GIVE” to 50555 or by mail addressed to Hope for Haiti Now Fund, Entertainment Industry Foundation, 1201 West 5th St., Suite T-700, Los Angeles, CA, 90017.

Video: George Clooney’s Opening Remarks & Bruce Springsteen’s Performance

Video: Madonna Performs ‘Like A Prayer’

And what better way to look at our history than to break down some of the things we’re thankful for!

We’re thankful for pop culture – TV and movies (and our media spin on them):

» Harry Potter and the media muggles

» The Twilight saga characters and their media matches

» Gossip Girl cast matched with their media mates

» The Mad Men (and women) of Morning Joe

» Saturday Night Live‘s great news spoofs

» And the Saturday Night Live-inspired “Real Biker Chicks”

We’re thankful for those times when we can be service-y:

» Halloween costumes ripped from the headlines

» Ways to get over (or not get over) a fear of flying

We’re thankful for Oprah:

» Outrageous Sarah Palin stories Oprah will have to address (she went 0 for 10)

» Best Oprah moments

We’re thankful for those we’ve lost:

» “Summer of Death”

And we’re thankful for the future:

» 25 bloggers you need to know

But mainly, we’re thankful for…you our readers. Happy Thanksgiving!

You won’t believe this: it has only been one year since the live action stars of teen vampire sensation Twilight infiltrated popular culture. And part of the reason they seem like such fixtures of celebrity already — apart from their impossible good looks, effortless cool and high-powered marketing machine — is their presence in print and command of their image. Flattering pictures may not be hard to come by when you’re young and playing magical characters, but from this charming Vanity Fair spread to the endless tabloid fabrications, the kids always come out looking all right.

With this weekend’s release of the latest entry in “The Twilight Saga:” New Moon, it’s safe to say a new publicity blitz is upon us. Until now, stars Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson have been the face of the group, but upcoming covers have been confirmed including new heartthrob Taylor Lautner (who plays Jacob) on Rolling Stone and a cast photo for Entertainment Weekly, but as you’ll see below, newsstands are already bleeding Twilight blood. Does the cast work best as an ensemble or do they have the star power to go out solo? In this edition of Cover Wars, we remember the classic covers from the Twilight franchise, knowing full well that many more are now in print. We’ll call it The Greatest Twilight Cover So Far. Here are the contenders:

Their debut cover, a July 2008 issue of Entertainment Weekly, was initially met with derision by the Twilight faithful, weary of seeing their favorite book series come to life. “That’s Edward?” they thought. But it might have been the final note of dissent — that, or the haters were drowned out by the screaming droves who quickly fell in love. The photo is cheesy, to be sure, but something about it made certain that it was the first of many.

Mediaite Grade (B-): The pale skin is too white. His sandy blonde hair seems off. An apple insinuates an incorrect fairy tale. The pair looks uncomfortable together, not drawn together by irresistible passion. And yet… maybe only in retrospect, but the B-movie feel of the cover is an apt introduction to the campy film, all glittery torsos and vampire baseball. And for Kirsten and Rob, it was the beginning of a beautiful friendship…

Are they the hip young versions of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie? Probably — at least in the sense that their tabloid covers seem endless. Every time you step into the checkout line at a grocery store Stewart’s big bored eyes and Pattison’s glare are staring back at you, and in that sense, this OK! cover represents a much larger canon of tabloid Twilight. They’re as interchangeable as they are ubiquitous.

Mediaite Grade (C-): If you’re a fan of the celebrity romance, this is an easy one to buy into. It’s vague enough to be mysterious and picturesque enough to make for enjoyable covers. But that doesn’t mean it’s not dishonest. For instance, this issue of OK! uses a staged award show still with the headline “Yes! They’re in love.” And that’s to say nothing of “Obsessed With Each Other” or “Twilight Fight!” or… “Engaged!” Yikes.

>>>NEXT: Kristen and Rob Go Solo!

The Twilight Saga: New Moon opens in theaters almost exactly one year from the date when the first little Twilight movie entered our lives. You know, the one based on a ‘children’s book’ by Stephenie Meyer (in fact it was named one of Publishers Weekly’s best children’s books of 2005), about a teenage girl who moves to a new town and just happens to fall in love with a vampire (happens all the time), the one that single-handedly turned a tiny indie studio, Summit Entertainment Group — previously best known for partnering with Disney/Touchstone on the “Step Up” franchise — into a force to be reckoned with, and pretty much the envy of all of Hollywood. Aside from the once-a-decade type of phenomenon that is the recently released Paranormal Activity ($15K budget; $100 million-plus box office), has there been a more profitable, franchise-creating film in recent years than that first little Twilight movie? I think upon a glance at the box office returns it’s safe to say the answer is no. Let’s consider the numbers.

The first little Twilight movie had a reported budget of $37 million, and its take at the worldwide box office was over $380 million. Not too shabby a return. And these figures don’t count the receipts from the seemingly endless pieces of Twilight merchandise now flooding our economy – the boatfuls of dvds, lunch boxes, and R-Patz tshirts that are being sold (that’s Robert Pattinson for those of you playing at home). And can you imagine if the studio had a piece of tabloid magazine sales based on coverage of the star-crossed, are-they-a-couple-or-are-they-not stars of the movie series? Then we would be talking some big bucks.

Have I mentioned I have not yet seen that first little Twilight movie? Have I mentioned also that I am not a teenage girl? Well, truth be told I have the Twilight dvd in my possession and I swear I’m going to watch it soon, but I guess the point is it really doesn’t matter if I watch it. Sure, Summit will take my money gladly and I bet they secretly hope I have a crush on R. Patz too (sorry, ladies I just don’t see it), but their little business model for these little Twilight movies doesn’t really need to count on the 18-49 male demographic. Did I just type that and mean that? What other thriving Hollywood franchise of any significance can pretty much ignore the entire male movie-going population? (Sorry, Sisterhood of Traveling Pants 2, based on the performance of your last film, you could use every male eyeball you can get). Don’t get me wrong, I fully realize that many male moviegoers are going to willingly tag along as dates with their female companions to see the next installment of Hollywood’s brand-new powerhouse franchise, and that there are many single men of all sexual orientations who will be lining up at theaters tonight. But none of those men matter.

The male moviegoer takes a rare backseat in the world of that little Twilight movie. In fact, when the first little Twilight movie opened a year ago to box office of $69.6 million during its opening weekend, females made up an astounding 75% of the audience. Well, last night’s midnight shows of New Moon topped all that: The debut set box office history, taking in $26.3 million across 3,514 theaters — in just the midnight showing. Tracking indicates that the second little Twilight movie will deliver grosses this weekend never seen outside of summer. We are talking weekend grosses potentially over $100 million. That’s just the first weekend and just U.S. box office. Wow.

To put an opening weekend of $100M in perspective, let’s compare those potential figures to the box office results for the original Star Wars trilogy (the holy trinity of movie trilogies). Keep in mind that average movie ticket prices back when the first Star Wars film was released in 1977 was $2.23 and grew to a wallet-busting $3.15 by the time the 3rd Star Wars film was released. Star Wars Episode IV (better known as the original Star Wars), released in 1977, actually opened in limited release (only 43 theaters) and made $1.5M its opening weekend (an astounding figure based on the limited opening run). Episode 5 (aka The Empire Strikes Back) earned $4.9M in its opening weekend in 1980. Finally, Episode 6 (aka Return of the Jedi) made $23M in its opening weekend in 1983. So even if we consider that average movie ticket prices have basically quadrupled since 1983, a $100M opening weekend for that second little Twilight movie would not only put it in the same rarified air as the Star War series, but it would even outperform the series opening weekend box office results. Again, wow.

It is the teenage girl who rules the school in this case (including the inner teenage girl among Twilight-obsessed twenty and thirty-something women who fixate over the love triangle that is Edward, Bella and Jacob with an equal passion and fervor). They will compete among themselves to lay claim to who saw the film the most times over opening weekend, they will buy every piece of Twilight merchandise possible, they will read and re-read the books in hot anticipation for the next movie in the series (The third little Twilight movie aka The Twilight Saga: Eclipse is already slated for release on June 30th of next year – start lining up now ladies). Yes these Twi-hards or Twilighters or whatever they are calling themselves have become the Star Wars geeks of this generation and in the process have created a new franchise and single-handedly launched a new Hollywood studio powerhouse.

So, yeah, I won’t be lining up tonight. I don’t think Summit Entertainment Group is losing any sleep. They are too busy steamrolling ahead with their plans for the 3rd little and 4th little Twilight movies. And limbering up their calculator-punching fingers to start tabulating the box office receipts as they begin to roll in this weekend. And thinking up Twilight-based theme park rides and video games and cell phone wall paper and coffee mugs and snuggies and…ok you get the point.

Now that I’ve gotten that off my chest, have you noticed that in the wake of Twilight: New Moon’s premiere, there are an awful lot of Twilight-related articles gumming up the Internet lately? Is it possible that accomplished journalists are writing about Twilight not because they are deeply interested in it, but because they are trying to get traffic to their websites?

Bonnie Fuller‘s HollywoodLife.com launched today. According to the press release, “HollywoodLife.com’s digital conversationality also provides a richer take on lifestyle and beauty as always-updated, style-sensible women across the country will be able to respond, giving approval of the latest trends in beauty, weighing in on fashion, or revealing their own secrets of shopping.” Yet the lead story is a wallpaper-sized graphic of Taylor Lautner, Kristen Stewart, and Robert Pattinson proclaiming “New Moon Mania!” below which is a link that says “Everything New Moon, All The Time!” and blanket coverage of the premiere.

Why is an accomplished journalist like Bonnie Fuller, who was born in 1956, so into the tweenish vampire saga? A hypothesis: Twilight has a rabid fan base who tend to travel in packs, and getting some of them via Google search and cross-promotion with her parent site Mail.com could not only give her strong first-day traffic, but could grab for the longer term some of that coveted eighteen-to-thirty-five female demo that her site is after.

And it’s not just HollywoodLife: Fuller’s Mail.com colleague Nikki Finke, hailed by this very site as “a one-woman trade publication whose tenacity has landed her scoop after scoop,” routinely posts about Twilight, though she often prefaces with a wry aside like “Yes, this is another in my shameless plugs for Twilight fan traffic.”

This is to say nothing of Entertainment Weekly, whose PopWatch blog sees fit to Twilight it up, or Cinematical, with their ”Fan Made: Raunchy, Vampiric ‘Twilight’ Underoos:” (image via Twitarded)

Or Mediaite, which took a break from their probing, insightful media coverage to note that Geraldo Rivera looks like Charlie Swan.

it's probably because they both have brown hair.

Twilight bait works, or thinks it works, because it’s something for very little. It’s like blowing a dog whistle: the people who care about it come flocking when they hear it, and the people who don’t will go happily about their ways.

Only instead of not hearing it, they hear a faint but shrill sound, and are mildly irritated. And if you, the publication, spend too much time blowing on the dog whistle that is Twilight, then you are neglecting many fine woodwind instruments that you could be playing otherwise, such as the piccolo. Even though you thought that you were getting something for nothing (dogs) by playing on the dog whistle, in reality, the dog whistle was playing you.

In this extended metaphor, the “piccolo” equates to outstanding investigative journalism.

In all seriousness, any site that covers popular culture or Hollywood should be talking about Twilight, because like it or not, it’s one of the great pop cultural happenings of our time. The bigger issue is when sites overcover it to the exclusion of everything else, or stray too far and too frequently off their actual beats. A website is not a magazine, and part of the beauty of the web is that it allows readers and writers to connect who might not encounter each other otherwise. But when every site chases the same few stories, they all take on a watery, same-y flavor that can’t be too pleasing to the loyal readers who are supposed to be their audience.

p.s. Who makes a better stand-in for Robert Pattinson, Andy Samberg or Bill Hader? Trick question, there’s only one Robert Pattinson.

When the October issue came to light, surprisingly, all seemed to be at peace. Jackson graced the cover like so many of Harper’s Bazaar’s past cover girls have: chic, elegant, impeccably styled. Donning an exquisitely draped Donna Karan dress in one photo, with Jackson-eque leather fingerless gloves, and a Ryan Wilde felt hat in another, the shoot and interview played homage to Jackson, her brother, and to the magazine’s ability to glamorize a celebrity frequently found on the few pages of the tabloids for fashion mishaps.

But with Kristin Stewart and Robert Pattinson, stars of teeny bopper favorite Twilight and the wildly anticipated New Moon were announced as next month’s cover stars, all bets seem off. The newsstand cover, Gucci dress or not, looks more like a high school yearbook photo for the “Cutest Couple” superlative than an high fashion shot.

The spread features two redeeming shots: one featuring Stewart and Pattinson on a motorcycle, her in a sequin Alexander Wang dress, him in Dior Homme, and the other featuring the two against a column, Stewart in a belted Versace gown and this season’s token YSL pumps.

But all the McQueen and Prada in the world could not keep Stewart from sporting her usual “uncomfortable in my own skin” appearance and Pattinson’s “most popular guy in high school” aura. You can dress them up in couture, but this alone does not make them Bazaar cover worthy.

SLIDESHOW: Vampires & Zombies!…including this hormone-and-blood-drenched slideshow featuring bloodsucking studs, nubile young vampiresses and strapping zombie sidekicks in all their hot, flesh-decaying undead glory.

OMG OMG Robert Pattinson Is So Hot: Well, he is — as this poll of “The Best Twilight Magazine Cover E-vah” conclusively proves. BTW if you need more Robert Pattinson and Twilight coverage, our pals at Gossip Cop have that beat pretty thoroughly covered.

Harry Potter and the Media Muggles: This was an early Mediaite multi-post (as you can tell by the fact that we have all this content spread across just three pages — what were we thinking?) — but it remains one of my faves. For anyone who loves Harry Potter (as I ferociously do) and delights in the old “separated at birth” game, this is ridiculous fun (Graydon Carter as Lucius Malfoy! Malcolm Gladwell as Professor Trelawney! It still cracks me up). If you missed it the first time it’s definitely worth a look now. The pictures are uncannily good.

Eyeborg: “The Age of the Post-Human is Coming Soon” Rob Spence is our Cyborg Columnist. I’ll say it again: We have a Cyborg Columnist. For Hallowe’en, if he wants to dress up as a CYBORG, he just wears what he wants. Why? BECAUSE HE’S A CYBORG! Read his adventures in cyborg-dom here, at his EYEBORG tag page. Badass. p.s. We could very well also have a Cylon columnist, because according to SyFy president Dave Howe apparently you can’t tell the difference between them and humans. Oh well THAT should help. Thanks a lot, Dave Howe.

To Bloodcopy and Back: Remember the whole Gawker Bloodcopy hoo-ha? Wow that seems like ages ago.

Dr. Horrible: Here at Mediaite we LOVE Dr. Horrible. With our freeze-rays we would stop the world, if we could, so everyone could be in their Michael Jackson and Billy Mays and Slutty Everything costumes forever and ever. But we can’t, so tomorrow when you’re sad it’s all over and feeling vaguely ill from eating so much candy corn, check out our Dr. Horrible tag page to watch clips (or the whole thing here) and swoon over Neil Patrick Harris and Nathan Fillion. Also please patronize our “The Hammer Is My Penis” tag. It’s the little things.

Chopper Chicks in Zombietown: Far be it from me to extend the dominance of our REAL BIKER CHICKS post on our “Most Popular” list (it’s the Shamu of Mediaite!), but how could I possibly exclude Chopper Chicks in Zombietown? “They’re bad! They’re beautiful! They’re 8 broads on the rag!” WHAT IS NOT TO LOVE? We should also include She-Devils on Wheels in this round up, too, because they’ll mess you up pretty good.

Glenn Beck’s Powerful Vagina: This is Mediaite’s signature monster: VAGINA GLENNTATA. Honestly, this dress looks like a poster for a horror movie — even without Glenn Beck’s face! But actually, there’s a whole backstory to this, and it actually makes sense if only you read it (don’t worry, it’s all conveniently laid out for you under our “Powerful Vaginas” tag). The upshot is, it IS a scary monster, and as a matter of fact I was going to wear this for Hallowe’en this year until I remembered that the dress was $125. What-ever.

Geraldo vs. Stossel’s “Ultimate Mustache” Battle: Wait, those mustaches aren’t Hallowe’en costumes? Oops, my bad.

The Goth Women of the View, feat. Bill O’Reilly As A Vampire: You can’t make this shizz up. Check out the first few moments of the clip — at first I thought Baba Wawa was Cher…in the “If I Could Turn Back Time” video. Well done, Babs!

The Best of The Shining: What do you do on Hallowe’en when Lester Holt steals your Slutty Susan Boyle costume right out from under you? Do the next best thing: Spend a few hours collecting clips from The Shining and pretending that you’re not at all freaked out. Oh and that helps a lot when you’re alone in the deserted office on Hallowe’en Night. What am I, an idiot? I might as well be the babysitter going to take a shower. Sheesh.

Mediaite Presents: Hallowe’en Costumes Ripped From The Headlines: And now we come full circle, to the Mediaite Suggested Hallowe’en Costumes, which no doubt guided your festive choices, dear reader (we’re betting there will be photos of this eventually). I myself can’t wait to play Hallowe’en Bingo with Balloon Boy costumes (touché on this one).

Mediaite’s Glenn Beck Tag Page: Be afraid. Be very afraid.

That’s it! Have a happy Hallowe’en, everyone! Wait a second, how did that giant Megan Fox picture get in there? Ooops. See below.

But from what we’ve seen so far, we narrowed it down to four: the initial EW cover featuring Edward and Bella, the Kirsten Stewart/Robert Pattinson OK! tabloid fare, Stewart solo on Interview and Pattinson doing GQ alone. For her stellar career year and a sleek cover design, we gave the title to Interview and Stewart, but the poll results had a different take. The winner?

Robert Pattinson on GQ

He captured over 50% of the votes, with Stewart’s Interview coming in second place with 33%, and the other two totaling less than 10% each. A lot of credit goes to the RobPattzNews Twitter feed for getting out the vote. Here’s the breakdown in graph form:

It’s not hard to figure out the motivation behind the vampire zeitgeist — with Barack Obama in office and a times-are-a-changin’ vibe as the aughts draw to a close, bloodsuckers represent the Other in a swiftly changing planet. True Blood‘s vamps are Alan Ball’s thinly-veiled metaphor for gay rights. (A “God Hates Fangs” church sign drives the point in with a stake in the opener.) Twilight‘s Edward Cullen is a hero to abstinent teens (and their moms), making scary-sexy palatable for the Rick Warren set. The soon-to-be-developed Anita Blake series casts vampires as misunderstood outcasts fighting for “Preternatural Rights” – a continuation of Laurell K. Hamilton’s bestselling novels (IFC will premiere the show this fall.) To sum it up, vamps are outsiders – and America has a lot of outsiders these days.

But with Halloween around the corner and tween’s fake fangs starting to look a little forced, what spooky creature will next inhabit the popular imagination?

I’ve got a theory, summed up in one word: BRAAAAAIIIINNNS!

Zombies have returned to the popular imagination for a while now, with Simon Pegg’s breakout Shaun of the Dead reuniting the brain-eating genre. Next up is Woody Harrelson’ s Zombieland, which has “cult sleeper/teenage boy-fest” written all over it.

But that’s not all: days after the Zombieland premiere, Random House is backing The Zombie Survival Guide: Recorded Attacks, a graphic novel/zombie primer by Max Brooks (itself a sequel to his original 2003 guide) that will prepare us all from the brain fetishists.

Zombies are also infiltrating YA lit, a sure sign of future teen movie supremacy. There’s Generation Dead: Kiss of Life, about a high school girl named Phoebe dating a zombie version of Edward Cullen, and You Are So Undead to Me about a cheerleader who finds out she’s a beacon for the “living-impaired.” There’s even an early 2009 offering, Zombie Queen of Newbury High, about about a high school prom queen who mind controls her student body into voting for her. And there’s a potential werewolf contender in Bitches, which is hilariously pitched as “Werewolf ‘Sex & The City” and in development by FOX.

Meanwhile, the blockbuster to watch is Quirk Books’ Pride and Prejudice and Zombies it’s already the subject of a multi-studio bidding war. Or will ABC’s lizard-people remake, V, be the supernatural dark horse, putting aliens back in the popular psyche?

I don’t know, but one thing’s for sure: in a recession-addled media culture, the escapism of the fantastic isn’t going away any time soon. Shooting zombies is way more fun than covering the latest foreclosure story.

SLIDESHOW: VAMPIRES & ZOMBIES!: Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart, Megan Fox, Evan Rachel Wood, and more!

Jessica Gold Haralson is a writer and a gamer who writes about various topics, including entertainment, pop culture, and new media. She probably spends more time than is necessary playing World of Warcraft.