Krauthammer Deadpans: Pearl Harbor Does Not ‘Do Justice To The Grandness Of Newt’

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by Frances Martel | 7:31 pm, December 26th, 2011

» 15 comments

Charles Krauthammer gets plenty of (well-earned) credit on the right for being one of the preeminent political thinkers, but many overlook that, when he wants to, he has better comedic timing than probably anyone in his field. His deadpan was in rare form tonight as he discussed the case of Newt Gingrich comparing his logistical incompetence to Pearl Harbor, when he suggested that it was an offense to the grandiosity of Newt Gingrich to compare a failure in his campaign to a historical event that didn’t even involve Newt Gingrich.

“I’m not sure the analogy really does justice to the grandness and immensity of Newt,” Krauthammer replied to a question on his analogy, without indicating that he was joking, at all. He then went on to outline his own analogy– a John Lithgow-worthy Newtism if there ever was one:

“I think the better analogy is 1066, the Battle of Hastings. And I think King Harold is dead, and William the Conqueror has landed and Newt is going to pick up the crown of the last king of the Saxons and lead a trusty band of Saxons– fueled with money from Freddie Mac– and will retake Britain from William and change the course of European history. I think that analogy captures the cosmic importance of the Newt campaign.”

It’s no King Leonidas and the 300 Spartans, but it’ll do.

Krauthammer then got serious for a second, noting that “it’s hard to make a parody of Newt and the way he imagines himself” (Krauthammer made it look easy), but that he was happy that Gingrich was around and that he “injects a little humor in the campaign,” intentional or otherwise.

The comment via Fox News below:

charles krauthammer, fox news, Leonidas, newt gingrich, Pearl Harbor, Shannon Bream, Special Report

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_C7RM2CCQUO4VVC56BAXMWCYYKQ Samsohn

normally i don’t like charles’ responses – he’s so dry and serious – but here was a hilarious comment about newt as william the conquerer - lol nice 1 sire
Anonymous

Newt is Pearl Jam.

And I don’t mean the band.
Ben

Jeez…how long did he work on that one?
Didn’t know this guy could be that funny.
Pretty good tongue-in-cheek stuff..
Anonymous

That was a thing of beauty. I salute you, Charles Krauthammer!
Hout Bosques

No, you have that 180 degrees wrong; he’s describing Newt as the guy on the HOME DEFENDING side, the SAXON SIDE, who comes on the dead body of Harald the Tardy (son of & heir to Ethelred the Unready; real history here folks, not the phony re-imagined crap that Gingrick peddles.), with that arrow sticking out from his eye socket, & picks up Harald’s trusty sword with the avowed intent that he “will retake Britain from William” (to directly quote the words of Krauthammer the Pontificant).

But I sympathize with your first point; contrary to Frances Martel’s take, der Kraut’s effort at humor here is too ponderous; he really needed to be able to channel Colbert channelling Newt – or, as Frances touches on, Lithgow channelling “Ging-Grich”) – but then, they’re both liberals, so that’s not about to happen.
Hout Bosques

You must not be familiar with Das Sour Kraut: this does not show, as the headline asserts, his “deadpan” – rather, it puts on display the full range of his emotive potential.
Hout Bosques

There’s no doubt he worked on it. He only gets invited on because Ailes recognizes he plays ball with Fuppet News Channel policy, which at this point is to knock down every other GOP contestant without making it to painfully obvious for even FNC pond slime viewers to miss that the Murdoch-Ailes Axis is in the bag for Mittens.
Ben

Yea I know,but it was still funny…
http://pulse.yahoo.com/_C7RM2CCQUO4VVC56BAXMWCYYKQ Samsohn

i stand corrected from a historical standpoint :)
Anonymous

Question: What is the difference between Newt Gingrich and God?

Answer: God does not think that He is Newt Gingrich!
Anonymous

There is a TV program called “Inside Washington” that’s produced on a commercial Washington, DC station and distributed to several PBS stations. It airs in Boston on a digital sub-channel of WGBX-TV. The K-man’s wit is often on display therein, especially during his tussles with Mark Shields (who also appears on “The PBS News Hour” on Fridays).
http://pulse.yahoo.com/_LR3I4X656U47FEK4XYRP6VHJ5U Marie

I wonder how the widows and family members of the fallen at Pearl Harbor think about this. I have not seen any comments from them. The analogy that Newt should have used is losing a “3 legged” race to all the others that were in the “egg in spoon” race.
Anonymous

Since Newt’s problem in Virginia is ‘self-inflicted’, I think he is “not quite the historian” he wants you to think he is. I like your analogy best. Yes, Newt is in the grown-ups game. He needs to get out.
Anonymous

We can only hope.
Andrew Bratcher

dude, I just read your blog…

Get help. Psychiatrist.

And no, that’s not a secret code and no I’m not the FBI. I’m just a stranger telling you something’s wrong with you.