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Mitt Romney Delivers Letterman’s Top 10 Things Mitt Romney Wants To Say To American People

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As frontrunner Newt Gingrich‘s poll numbers descend from their former lunar colony heights, slow-and-steady GOP presidential candidate Mitt Romney is poised to capitalize on his rival’s stumble. In a shrewd move, with shrewd timing, the former Massachusetts Governor appeared on The Late Show Monday night to deliver host David Letterman‘s Top Ten List. Romney’s performance was characteristically wooden, but achieved the desired humanizing effect, and distilled at least one essential truth.

The Rise of the Planet of the Newts has been predictably brief, and now that Gingrich has fallen behind in Iowa, and sits in a tie with Romney in the most recent national poll, Mitt Romney could use something of a charm offensive headed into the early Republican primaries. His appearance on Letterman, then, was a well-timed, shrewd move. I don’t want to spoil the “Top Ten Things Mitt Romney Wants To Say To The American People,” but I will say that #2 will likely be one of the few times the world will see unanimous agreement between Romney and every liberal in America.

RELATED: Top Ten Reasons Newt Gingrich Will Flame Out Like A Napalm Birthday Candle

Here are the Top Ten Things Mitt Romney Wants To Say To The American People, as read by Mitt Romney, from CBS’ The Late Show:


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  • Levi

    This was painful to watch. Jesus, he’s like a robot.

  • Anonymous

    Really?  Was it?  Are you gonna be OK?

  • Anonymous

    To say his delivery was dry would be a bit of an understatement

  • Levi

    Yea I think I’ll be aiit, thanks man.

  • WiddleBabyDanielson

    The picture looks like a mannequin.

  • Anonymous

    That was the best thing I’ve seen him do, for whatever that’s worth.

  • http://www.facebook.com/eric.boisen Eric J. Boisen

    You could tell he didn’t enjoy that one bit. He needs to loosen up, someone needs to re-oil his sockets.

  • Joke Scareborough

    Jake Tapper scoops the supposed “media” website and it’s “White House correspondent”.

    An all-star list of progressive and liberal media folks came to the White House today to chat with President Obama over coffee in the Roosevelt Room.The group chatted with the president about economic messaging, his agenda for 2012, the various campaign arguments against different GOP candidates, the desire among some Democrats for him to highlight his foreign policy accomplishments, fighting corporate influence and the “crappiness” of the Senate filibuster , as one attendee put it.

    Those there included the Washington Post‘s Ezra Klein and Greg Sargent, MSNBC anchors Ed Schultz, Rachel Maddow, and Chris Hayes, the Nation’s editor and publisher Katrina vanden Heuvel, the New York Times‘ Frank Bruni, and stars of the interwebs Arianna Huffington, Josh Marshall of Talking Points Memo, Faiz Shakir of ThinkProgress and Joy Reid of The Reid Report.

    http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/politics/2011/12/potus-has-coffee-with-progressive-media-stars/#comment-12304172

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_45S32GWGDRUJIL6E2U4HOZW4BM Bob

    Rick Perry actually did a pretty good job delivering his top 10 a month or so ago.

  • Anonymous

    Well, since it came from you, it’s worth nothing.

  • Hout Bosques

    Did Dave seem somewhat, uh, miffened at having to do this? “How was the back nine?” as an aside tends to fit an effort to demittsify the lameness of a bit to one’s audience. Anyway, it sure didn’t seem like it was Dave who instigated this – leave aside who in the “CBS Family” would have thought to have Romney deliver these line ‘live-ish and in person’ (Paging Mister Redstone, a Mister Sum-ner Red-stone!”). 

    Anyway, I disagree: he’s nothing like a robot. A robot delivering these lines wouldn’t work to make We The Viewers squirm so with the awkwardness of it all; a robot wouldn’t have been nearly this charmless; & a robot would at least have delivered these lines with some modicum of credibility. 

  • Hout Bosques

    Agreed: Perry does “wooden” with far more authenticity.

  • Hout Bosques

    Sounds like a pretty fun & lively bunch. Can you imagine having to spend relaxy-time with the likes of George F***ing Will, Hannitty, the late Charles Krauthammer, that dickwad (and latest winner of the SALON Hack of the Year Award) Mark Halprin, that pervy wanker Breitbart, Red Erik, Daffyd Brooks, & William (Not the Funny One) Kristol? Not even to mention your close namesake, Morning Goe.

  • Pablo

    So we’re doing campaign events in the White House…again?

  • Pablo

    Can you imagine letting Ed Schultz in your house?

  • Anonymous

    Thank you for this post, great example of the Main stream media advising and coordinating Owebumbles re election efforts, I guess we can expect fair reporting from their respective news outlets. Not.

  • Colter dravid

    great example of the Main stream media advising and coordinating Owebumbles re election efforts, 

    Sam Chanin

    https://plus.google.com/106911967179825485221#106911967179825485221/posts

    http://www.linkedin.com/pub/sam-chanin/31/33/b67

  • Anonymous

    Trevor is a worthless failure.

  • Anonymous

    These politicos should stay home. They have no business being out on the street. We’re in the hands of troglodytes.

  • The Real Royal Emperor

    The Late Charles Krauthammer …. Excellent!

  • The Real Royal Emperor

    I’m really looking for something to like about Willard, and I’m have a very difficult time. I don’t have any particular problem with his policy agenda, since with Willard policy changes hourly or more often, but he’s just so “icky”. I know that’s not a great term of art, but it seems to fit. Stiff. Groveling. Oily. Sanctimonious. Condescending. Ingratiating. I like him less than any of the other Clowns in this year’s GOP Circus. I even like the Newt better. At least he admits he is wholly lacking in moral clarity and a devotee of situational ethics.

  • Anonymous

    They Royal Empress is just concerned that with a Romney president she will finally have to get a job and not live off of the public.  She’ll have to give up her food stamps and welfare.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1252130808 Paige Cohen

    Okay, I am a Mitt supporter.  That was a little awkward.  The jokes were not funny at all.  You can see they didn’t try hard to make Mitt say funny lines.  Folks, that is Mitt Romney.  He is a gentleman.  He’s not one wild and crazy guy.  He is constant.  I liken him to 1950s character.  He is steady.  Really, after all we’ve been thru – it is time for steady, calm, effective leadership – not a reality star.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1252130808 Paige Cohen

    No – he is just Mitt.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1252130808 Paige Cohen

    Were the jokes funny?  uh, no – I could have written better lines.  Letterman seemed annoyed with the writing.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1252130808 Paige Cohen

    oh, he’s a handsome feller -

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1252130808 Paige Cohen

    that’s impossible.  He is very poised and proper – that is just the way he is.  Personally, they say he is a lot of fun to be around and quiite the prankster.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1252130808 Paige Cohen

    oh, you are not giving Mitt a chance.  He is a good man.  Wholesome. 

  • Anonymous

    Just when I think you’ve hit rock bottom in the old sewer system, you manage to find a little pocket of feces and go lower.

  • The Real Royal Emperor

    Actually, I am trying very, very hard.

  • The Real Royal Emperor

    In other words, you have no substantive response?

  • WiddleBabyDanielson

    Now that I think about it, I have several mannequins that look LESS stiff.

  • Anonymous

    “Whats up gangstas” coming out of Mitt-the-Robot’s mouth was the best one.

  • Anonymous

    Why does he stand like that, he has no comfort zone, he is a scary non-engaged robot.

  • Anonymous

    Do you liken him to 1950s character Eddie Haskell on Leave it to Beaver???  That’s who he reminds me of, an insincere brown noser.  Saying what he thinks you want to hear.  You interpret this as steady, calm and potentially effective, you are not a perceptive person.  He is a compulsive liar.

  • Anonymous

    Not

  • Anonymous

    That was his wife saying that, she is ambitious also, likes the look of that White House between visits to the multi million west coast house.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1252130808 Paige Cohen

    gee – a little envious aren’t you?  And where is Mrs. Obama vacationing right now?  All the GOP candidates are successful financially – good.  And of course Ann said that about Mitt — I don’t know him personally – geez.  You are trying awfully hard picking apart Mitt Romney.  And leave Ann out of it.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1252130808 Paige Cohen

    you are the one who can’t see the forest….  what a cynic you are.  President Romney will turn around Washington D.C. for the better – you’ll see.  I am very confident of it.  I have complete trust in Mitt.  Been supporting him since ’07.  It’s frustrating that he is smart isn’t it?  No Sarah Palin moron here.  You sound like children calling him robotic and stiff — immature people you are.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1252130808 Paige Cohen

    you are afraid of the little Mormon?  LOL — come on.  Robot term is getting real old.  When he is President standing tall for America in the world you are not going to think that.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1252130808 Paige Cohen

    the funnier part was Dave shaking his head saying “no you are not M to the double t…”

  • Anonymous

    When the haters leave Michelle out of it, we’ll leave Anne out of it; don’t be silly, she is a huge part of it and will have to take the heat.  Envy is not at play here, unless one wants money at any cost, which is a blanket right wing accusation.  Mitt was a bad governor of our state, he said anything to get elected, all lies.  I reallly don’t know which side of him is lying, is he a fake conservative or a fake liberal, he goes with the flow.  The Obamas pay for their own vacations and are not phonies, Romney is very scary and if you lack the perception and intelligence to really know what he is about, that’s your problem. 

  • Anonymous

    Give Mitt some credit, he was a good sport here and did a good job.

  • Anonymous

    He never turned Massachusetts around and had four years to do it, he was gone most of the time actually, Your trust is misplaced and unfounded, he IS a robot, and I’ve been following him since the 1990s when we should have learned enough about him to force him to go back to what he likes, money making.

  • Anonymous

    You are delusional, and need to do some research before you make these predictions.

  • Anonymous

    I agree. Rick Perry’s Top 10 was much funnier.

  • 12voltman1

    He is. If he ever got elected his likeness in the “Hall of Presidents” at Disney would be right on target. You really wouldn’t be able to tell the differance.

  • 12voltman1

    Mr charisma!

  • Anonymous

    Pitiful, really.

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