Trevor Noah Mocks Trump on Possible Love Child: Between All The Payoffs, ‘His Dong Has Its Own Economy’

 

Trevor Noah slammed President Trump over a newly-discovered payoff that was made during the election.

The New Yorker reported that the National Enquirer killed a story by buying it from a former Trump Tower doorman who alleged that Trump had a secret love child with a former employee. And the doorman, who was paid $30,000 in 2015, stands by his claim today.

“Oh snap! Jerry! Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!” Noah reacted. “Trump might have a secret kid? I bet everyone who doesn’t know their father right now is panicking. Yeah, they’re phoning their moms like, ‘Tell me it wasn’t him, Mom. Tell me it wasn’t him!'”

The Daily Show host quipped that there have been so many payoffs to coverup Trump’s affairs, it’s as if “his dong has its own economy” that has its own “GDP: gross domestic penis.”

“I mean, think about it. Everyone’s getting paid; porn stars, doormen, lawyers,” Noah continued. “At this point, I’m worried that if Trump stops cheating on Melania, the stock market will crash. There’s just going to be another recession.”

Noah joked that if you just so happened to be Trump’s long lost love child, you can “be in line to inherit billions of dollars in debt.”

He then came to the realization… that perhaps he himself is Trump’s love child.

“I always felt like there was something, something that connected the two of us,” Noah addressed Trump directly. “I could see it now! I’ll show you my birth certificate!”

Watch the clip above, via Comedy Central.

New: The Mediaite One-Sheet "Newsletter of Newsletters"
Your daily summary and analysis of what the many, many media newsletters are saying and reporting. Subscribe now!

Tags: