Is it news that Gordon Ramsay has a beef with chef nemesis Jamie Oliver? Not particularly, but now it sounds like he’s starting to fill a Mean Girls-esque Burn Book about the man. In an interview with a British TV presenter, Ramsay launched an assault of insults against Oliver, including the inspired taunt that Oliver was a Fatty McFailureson von Smellypants.
“You have to be very careful when you go across the pond and want to dictate to Americans about healthy eating,” he said about the cancellation of Oliver’s Food Revolution, and openly speculated that Oliver’s weight gain contributed to the show’s failure. “If you’re not in that best shape yourself then you have to be very careful.”
In addition, like the best of Queen Bees, Ramsay wants the world to know that Jamie’s just talking smack about Gordon because he’s, like, super jeal of Gordon’s hot wife, Tana. “I think Jamie Oliver has a crush on my wife,” he gossiped, “because every time he gets the chance to mention me he goes to my wife.” So not only is Jamie Oliver fat, he’s a fat whore.
But don’t think that Ramsay’s being uncharitable towards Oliver at all, oh no! “For Christmas all I want to do is give him a f***ing good wash,” he offered.
And to cement his position as Queen Bee of the culinary world, sometimes Ramsay will cook the recipes from his rivals’ cookbooks, particularly those from a certain loser who goes by the name of Marco Pierre White, take them to his local animal shelter, and feed that “shit” to the dogs. “There was one time when there was a golden retriever and I made a dish out of Antony Worrall Thompson’s book — and the dog wouldn’t eat it.”
Has anyone realized that Regina George has the same initials as Gordon Ramsay, but backwards? At the very least, they share the same tactics. Oh, if only Gordon Ramsay were a teenage girl in high school; he’d probably be just as entertaining. Also, on Fridays, he wears pink.
Have a tip we should know? firstname.lastname@example.org