Once upon a time, this Japanese guy decided to charge some utter weirdoes a lot of money for the pleasure of eating…well, what we’ll refer to as his “ding-dong.” Mao Sugiyama, a Japanese artist, surgically removed his ding-dong, garnished it with mushrooms and garlic, and served up his own pajama python to five guests at a banquet.
Though Japanese authorities couldn’t arrest Sugiyama for cannibalism (there are no laws prohibiting it in Japan), the Daily Mail has learned that they have charged the man with indecent exposure of his one-eyed trouser mouse. In a statement, Tokyo’s Metropolitan Police Department said that the district prosecutors would soon receive criminal papers against Sugiyama and other organizers of the event.
Sugiyama, who describes himself as asexual, had announced the event on Twitter after he had surgically removed his doo-hickey and having the whole shebang frozen. “First interested buyer will get them, or I will also consider selling to a group,” he tweeted. “Will prepare and cook as the buyer requests, at his chosen location.”
Each guest paid roughly $260 per person to partake of the schlong, which is around the same price of a dinner at the finest high-end restaurants in the world and is, therefore, a total ripoff.
(PS: All of those strange words meant “penis.”)
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