Isn’t that the best headline ever? But this really happened, a chocolate cartel exists, and now you can imagine Breaking Bad with chocolate. After a five-year investigation, Canadian officials have charged Nestle Canada and Mars Canada with conspiring to fix the price of chocolate with their competitors, a serious offense that could result in millions of dollars’ worth of fines or imprisonment. But they would have gotten away with their little “chocolate cartel” if it weren’t for that punkass Hershey, who pled guilty and will get a lenient sentence for snitching on its cho-bros.
NBC News reports that the Canadian Competition Bureau first learned of the price-fixing activities through a program that promises legal immunity to parties which first disclose these types of cartel-like activities. Mars and Nestle denied the accusations and went all, “Nuh uh, I ain’t know nothin’ about no allegations of ‘conspiracy to fix the price of chocolate confectionery products in Canada,’ ese.” But in a statement, the makers of the Hershey Kiss acknowledged that they’d cooperated with the authorities ever since receiving messages in 2007 outlining the chocolate plot.
You know who was also betrayed by a Kiss? Jesus.
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