Recently, a prestigious little corner of the Time Warner Center experienced a shock when the bookkeeper at Masa, the legendary sushi restaurant with three Michelin stars, was indicted for stealing $96,000 from the company. But when the New York County District Attorney’s office announced that they had charged Rafael Thomas with one count of grand larceny and twenty counts of falsifying business records, they just had to do it with a restaurant pun, didn’t they?!
It’s bad enough that Thomas hurt his own restaurant by skimming money, overpaying himself, and cashing corporate checks — was it not worse for District Attorney Cyrus Vance to say the following in the statement announcing Thomas’s indictment?
“This was a raw deal for a hot restaurant,” said District Attorney Vance. “This defendant is charged with cooking the books for more than a year at one of the top dining establishments in the country.”
While he goes on to state that “every case is important to its victims and to this Office’s Special Prosecutions Bureau, from the fake attorney who steals $1,600 from immigrants to the person who steals from a restaurant where bills can easily reach $1,600 a meal,” it didn’t matter at that point: the puns happened, and the world can see them, DA Cyrus Vance. Are you trying to Law and Order your way into the governorship? Not on our watch.
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