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The Funniest Stand-Up Bits About Food, The Thirdenning

We’re back, and we’ve got more food-related stand-up bits for you to take you into the weekend. In case you were wondering, yes. “Hot Pocket” is on this list.

1. Dane Cook – Burger King

Despite our feelings on Cook, this joke is good. One of our favorite lines: “I called it the BK Lounge.”

 

2. Mitch Hedberg – Pringles

“I think Pringles’ initial intention was to make tennis balls.” Truer words have never been spoken.

 

3. Jim Gaffigan – Hot Pocket

You knew this one was coming. “Tonight’s specials: We have a seabass which is broiled, and we have a Hot Pocket which was cooked in a dirty microwave.”

 

4. Patton Oswalt: KFC Famous Bowls

“Yes? We can pile that in a bowl? But we can also arrange it on a plate like you’re an adult with self-respect and dignity.” ‘Nuff said.

 

5. Aziz Ansari – Cold Stone

“I couldn’t even get a small, because their sizes are ‘Like It,’ ‘Love It,’ and ‘GOTTA HAVE IT.’ What kind of crackhead terminology is that?” Have you ever had a ‘Gotta Have It’ Birthday Cake Remix? It might actually end you.

 

Have we missed any? Let us know!

[image via screen grab]

Related:

The Best Stand-Up Bits About Food, Part 1

The Best Stand-Up Bits About Food, Part 2

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