Martha Stewart is hip to the social media game, and so she graciously gave an hour of her life to doing a beautifully candid “Ask Me Anything” on Reddit. Fun fact: Martha doesn’t shy away from prison questions! Now we’re dying for her Orange is the New Black cameo. Here are her 12 best answers.
On her South Park episode: “I thought it was really cute!”
Her best sex advice: “Always take a bath before and after.”
And on copulating during bath time: “That’s good too, and don’t forget to brush your teeth.”
On what it’s like being friends with Snoop: “I wish I were closer friends with Snoop Dogg.”
On whether she has prison tats: “I would not EVER, EVER deface my body with tattoos.”
On the bastardization that is truffle oil: “I think truffle oil is one of the few ingredients that doesn’t belong in anyone’s kitchen. It is ruinous of most recipes.”
On her
On whether she had a prison nickname: “I think I did, but I can’t remember. I don’t think about the past.”
From the author of My Boyfriend Barfed In My Handbag … And Other Things You Can’t Ask Martha: “Okay, here goes: 1. How do you clean a steel riveted leather harness used for a strap-on dildo? 2. What’s the best way to remove skidmarks (left during sexual relations) from Pratesi sheets? 3. How can you clean semen stains off of a green velour recliner?”
Martha’s answer: “What’s a dildo?”
On running in 2016: “Sounds like a good idea, but I think there will be another strong woman candidate.”
Favorite celebrity: “Pharrell Williams. He’s so cute. I’ve actually seen him in person and adore his good humor.”
On prison food: “There was nothing remarkable about the food at all.”
(Also, in case you were wondering about the answer to that harness question…We know. Leather’s a bitch.)
[Reddit]