The latest how-to-be-a-walking-penis guide from Penis Monthly was so bad the first person in my feed to tweet it out already saw what was coming:
— Matt Pearce (@mattdpearce) October 30, 2014
Have at it, everybody:
1. Set this article on fire http://t.co/HID4WqYFRQ
2. Never say "friendzone" again
3. Stop expecting rewards for bare minimum human tasks.
— Stealthy Wratherton (@AthertonKD) October 30, 2014
the easiest way to avoid the friendzone is to acknowledge that the friendzone's a product of male entitlement culture http://t.co/Di2BQoAZpa
— Jessica Roy (@JessicaKRoy) October 30, 2014
Follow-up idea for Esquire: "How to dress like you appreciate people are even friends with you, you entitled prig"
— Fires of Hades Brown (@HayesBrown) October 30, 2014
The joke is that no woman considers a guy who uses the term "friendzone" a friend http://t.co/MrqALw8I5f
— Scott Bixby (@scottbix) October 30, 2014
But plz no pleats. RT @HayesBrown: Yes, Esquire, feed into notion that women are shallow and only like dudes because of money and clothes.
— Lauren Jenkins (@laurenist) October 30, 2014
Oh, duh, the problem all along has been the lack of lapel flower http://t.co/Wpk076VhVW
— Jim Newell (@jim_newell) October 30, 2014
also, according to that Esquire article, it costs $5,718 to get out of the friendzone…
— Neil (@Burghpunk) October 30, 2014
And my favorite:
I am going to provide my own guide to "how to get out of the friend zone." Thank me later.
1. DO not be a douchebag
— Spidey N. Gore (@moorehn) October 30, 2014
I renew my offer to double Charlie Pierce’s salary to write for any publication but Esquire.
[Image via Esquire]
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