‘Absolutely Bonkers’: Stephen Colbert Mocks Trump ‘Bitchy’ Letter to Congress


Stephen Colbert pilloried the “bitchy” and “absolutely bonkers” letter the White House sent to Congress blasting the House Democrats’ impeachment inquiry of President Donald Trump.

The Late Show host took dead aim at the White House’s arguments — which were roundly dismissed by House Democrats as “deranged” and “garbage” — that claimed on Tuesday the House impeachment investigation was “illegitimate.”

Quoting verbatim from what he called an “officially bitchy, eight-page” letter, Colbert said: “Given that your inquiry lacks any legitimate constitutional foundation, any pretense of fairness, or even the most elementary due process protections, the executive branch cannot be expected to participate in it.”

“Wait, wait, wait, wait,” a faux-befuddled Colbert said in reaction. “You can’t just not participate in your own impeachment.”

Quickly switching to impersonate a stern judge’s voice, Colbert announced: “Sir, you are charged with assault and battery. How do you plead?”

“Um…pass?” Colbert-as-defendant meekly answered, to laughter.

“The letter is full of absolutely bonkers arguments,” Colbert went on, noting that, in it, the White House claims: “You have denied the president the right to cross-examine witnesses.”

“The witness is Trump’s incriminating phone transcript, which he released!” an exasperated Colbert pointed out. “If he wanted to, he could cross-examine himself. [as Trump] ‘Where was I on the night of the phone call?’ ‘I was on the phone!’ ‘Ah-ha! Well, let me ask you this. If that’s the case, did you get any dirt on Joe Biden?'”

Watch the video above, via CBS.

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