Jon Stewart Mocks Holographic ‘Dildo People’ In CNN’s Iowa Coverage
Jon Stewart Mocks Holographic 'Dildo People' In CNN's Iowa Coverage
Jon Stewart had a lot on his plate today, with the Iowa caucuses cramming a week’s worth of news into the wee hours of the night early Wednesday morning. Stewart gave every candidate their turn, and praised everyone from Rick Santorum to Mitt Romney for sticking with it. One entity notably getting moans and groans from Stewart for its inanity: CNN, for its “weeble” cyber-illustration of the caucuses.
Stewart began with some footage of the actual Iowa caucuses, which he couldn’t bring himself to mock because they were so “beautiful.” “It looks like a historical reenactment,” he noted, suggesting that “it would be instructive for it to just play out in real time over the cameras.” Instead, CNN used “weebles,” what Stewart described as “cybernetic, multi-colored featureless dildo people” after he yelled “Why????” at the screen for a good minute. “There are rooms in 99 counties that are filled with real people demonstrating the thing that you are trying to explain!”
He then turned to the candidates, and had some good words for Rick Perry and his “completely unjustified enthusiasm after a fifth place ass-kicking,” mocked the Marcus Bachmann “doggie sunglasses moment,” and sat in awe as Rep. Ron Paul‘s crowd cheered Ludwig von Mises. “It’s like being at a Jimmy Buffet show and being like ‘why is everybody wearing a parrot on their head?'”
The segment via Comedy Central below:
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