Here Are the Craziest Philly Police Scanner Reports After Eagles Win: ‘Someone Lit a Christmas Tree on Fire’


Sunday night, Philadelphia erupted into scenes of joy — and chaos — after the Eagles won the Super Bowl. Nobody had a harder job that night than the city’s police force, who had to field all manner of ridiculous complaint. How do we know that? Slate got a hold of some of their police scanner chatter, which shows a city teetering on the edge of absolute lunacy.

Here are some of the craziest actual lines from the actual police scanner.

10:46 p.m. “It’s endless, chief. Endless.”

10:53 p.m. “About four stories above the Wawa we got people out on the ledge. I can’t tell how they came up. If they’re not allowed to be there can we get them down? … They’re coming out of the window up there.”

10:57 p.m. “Be advised that someone is flying a drone in the area at 1-5 and Market.”

11:11 p.m. “They’re on top of trash trucks. There is to be no one on top of trash trucks, guys.”

11:14 p.m. “We have multiple people on Broad Street swinging on light poles.”

11:25 p.m. “I need to get the fire extinguisher out of my trunk. I got a fire on Broad Street just south of South. Someone lit a Christmas tree on fire.”

11:26 p.m. “They just flipped a car over here. If you could get a medical response team over here, I’d greatly appreciate it.”

11:38 p.m. “They’re trying to tear multiple light posts down and I don’t have anyone to counteract it right now.”

11:44 p.m. “A man jumped off the light pole and landed on his head.”

11:51 p.m. “On the southeast corner the pole is about to collapse. There are about 40 of them on there.”

11:53 p.m. “We have a large crowd throwing bottles and chanting ‘Meek Mill.’”

Of course, not all of this police scanner chatter was crazy in fun way. There were multiple reports of assault, among other serious crimes. Also there was the specter of racial bias, in which sports-related riots are gently dismissed but protests — such as those associated with the Black Lives Matter movement — are defamed.

[image via screenshot]

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