Set to the tune of Leonard Cohen‘s oft-covered classic “Hallelujah,” Sandler and David Letterman‘s long-time sidekick Paul Shaffer performed a parody titled “Sandy, Screw Ya!”
Name-dropping every famous New Yorker under the sun from Mayor Michael Bloomberg to Alex Rodriguez to Donald Trump‘s combover, the lyrics were as follows:
“The terror of the hurricane / The unforgiving wind and rain / New York, the world held its breath as the storm took it to you / But you’ve been knocked down in the past / Taking shots they thought would last / But you always get right up shouting ‘Hallelujah!’ / Hallelujah / Sandy, screw ya / We’ll get through ya / ‘Cause we’re New Yorkers.”New York, you dealt with crap before / Like squeegee man and tunnel whores / And restaurants delivery biking right through ya / The puke
on your stoops every Sunday morn’ / Times Square losing all its porn / Original Ray’s pizza closing to ya / But Hallelujah / Sandy, screw ya / We’ll get through ya / ‘Cause we’re New Yorkers.”‘Cause we believe this too shall pass / Like when Sanchez fumbled into an ass / During the playoffs, A-Rod telling girls in the crowd ‘I wanna do ya’ / The Mets have sucked since ’86 / Isaiah tried to ruin the Knicks / But now Jason Kidd and the boys can freakin’ school ya / Hallelujah / Sandy, screw ya / We’ll get through ya / ‘Cause we’re New Yorkers.”The bed bug scare of 2010 / The Lohans getting busted again and again / The lady who said she was a man right after she blew ya (sorry that was just me!) / Trump’s combover always making us sick/ The congressmen who tweeted his dick / The mayor’s ban on 32-ounce Mountain Dew-ya / Hallelujah / Sandy, screw ya / We’ll get through ya / ‘Cause we’re New Yorkers.”And Jersey, you’ve taken your share of hits / The Situation always showing his tits / And Turnpike exit 13 stinkin’ like poo-ya / You lost the Nets and now they’re good / But we’re still the Hudson brotherhood / Together we’ll give Sandy a big ‘fungool’-ya / Hallelujah / Connecticut too-ya! / We’llget through ya! / ‘Cause we’re New Yorkers!”
Watch the performance below, via Bloomberg:
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