With Christmas under a week away, and Hanukkah starting today, you likely have a refrigerator door full of holiday cards at home right now, featuring friends, family, and awkwardly dressed kids whose names you can’t remember. There might even be a dog or two in there. Perhaps the kids are making snow angels. Here at Mediaite, we get our fair share of cards, too. They’re just not as trite.
Take, for instance, the greeting we received from Fox News. In case you forgot that they had a great year, the network took the occasion of their annual holiday card to remind you. Merry Christmas? Maybe not, as the term “Christmas” is conspicuously, (and perhaps wisely?) absent from the card. Why politicize the holidays with good cheer!
The cover features a fox (get it?) racing ahead of CBS, ABC, and NBC. Make sure to note the CNN and MSNBC characters peeking over the hill on the left. Detractors (ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN, and MSNBC) are sure to recoil at the bravado in the card, which is, of course, just the
It gets better once you open the card. Instead of a simple “Season’s Greetings!” there is this parody:
(Sing to the tune of “Joy to the World”)Joy to the world for Fox News ChannelConsistently number oneWe are the network that viewers chooseFair and balanced newsSee our ratings we don’t loseBeating the rest in TV newsOn things for certain, we’re here to stayAs our fifteenth we celebrateNews-gathering redefined, our news channel’s one of a kindSo many wished we would failBut we proved we’re far from frailAnd winning we are as behind us they do trailOur talent can’t be matched, one can’t denyBut sadly they still tryBill O’Reilly and Hannity, Shepard Smith and Megyn KellyWith Fox & Friends on the couch we sitWhile Cavuto gives us a financial twistWe go live with The Five and tough questions Baier doesn’t missJoy to the world for Fox News ChannelThe most trusted name in newsThe best in breaking news, exclusive interviewWe are the ones to beatDefeat we shall not meetSo into the background the rest do retreat
Give Fox News credit — they never miss the chance to remind you who sits at the top of the ratings, even if this instance is with a wink and a nod.