‘TOUCH HER BOOBS!’ Things Get Weird When Hot Roast Comic Gifts Bill Maher A Sex Robot
Raunchy superstar roast comic Whitney Cummings made it weird when she gifted comic, pundit, and podcast host Bill Maher with a sex robot fashioned in her own likeness and cajoled him to “TOUCH HER BOOBS!”
Fans know her as a touring comic and mainstay of brutal celebrity roasts who has also starred in numerous films and TV shows, but news junkies might remember her edgy outburst on CNN’s New Years Eve special this year.
Cummings was a guest on this week’s edition of Maher’s Club Random Podcast, during which she gifted Maher with the robot she unveiled several years ago onstage, and who calls herself Bear Claw.
Maher was initially “creeped out” by the gift, but seemed to be warming up to the idea until Cummings took “giving head” a bit too literally and showed him what was under the bot’s hood:
BILL MAHER: That’s fucking creepy, that thing. When I walked in, I mean, there’s something about a human figure with any shroud over there, full head or shit.
WHITNEY CUMMINGS: Well, I just figured it might help for you to see that we don’t have that much to worry about in terms of the robots taking over.
BILL MAHER: I disagree. Wow, is that the one of you?
WHITNEY CUMMINGS: That’s me. That’s the one from the special. Do you want to see, like, the extent to which she is built? Custom. She can talk.
BILL MAHER: I don’t care about that. Okay. If I wanted to talk, I’d get a real woman.
WHITNEY CUMMINGS: This is why I think that this might just be the next star. I had to put her head.
BILL MAHER: Why are you taking your head off?
WHITNEY CUMMINGS: Well, now I thought you might want to see sort of the back of it. Are you sure?
BILL MAHER: I saw it on the special. I mean, you know, it’s exactly what I would think, a bunch of fucking wires. What am I gonna be like?
WHITNEY CUMMINGS: Well, it’s just something kind of odd happens when you…
BILL MAHER: Well, let’s not take the sexiness away from it. Now you’re taking it, now I’m not going to be able to fuck it at all because you’re taking all the romance out of it. I don’t want to see the back of her head.
WHITNEY CUMMINGS: Okay, you don’t wanna see her brain, that’s how smart she is?
BILL MAHER: Put it back on!
WHITNEY CUMMINGS: Well putting it back on is kind of a whole thing, so when you do have sex with her, be gentle.
BILL MAHER: Then just put it in her crotch for now.
WHITNEY CUMMINGS: Because you don’t want to have sex when her head goes flying off. There you go. There you. Hold on, hold on. Her teeth are even molded to mine as well.
BILL MAHER: Really?
WHITNEY CUMMINGS: Mm-hmm. There we go. Did you touch ’em?
BILL MAHER: No.
WHITNEY CUMMINGS: Touch her! Just give her a little, give her little squee.
BILL MAHER: All right, all right.
WHITNEY CUMMINGS: Give her a, I’m gonna sell you on robots on this special.
BILL MAHER: You know what? You know…
WHITNEY CUMMINGS: By the way, that’s Bill’s next stand-up special. You know what? You know?
BILL MAHER: It’s, uh…
WHITNEY CUMMINGS: Touch her boobs. Touch her boobs. Touch her boobs! Touch her boobs!
BILL MAHER: You know, I touch the part I would want to touch.
Do you know what’s–?
BILL MAHER: And that’s, you know, oh, I can’t talk about this. It’ll just get me in trouble.
Watch above via Bill Maher’s Club Random Podcast.
