1. Mediaite
  2. Gossip Cop
  3. Geekosystem
  4. Styleite
  5. SportsGrid
  6. The Mary Sue
  7. The Jane Dough
  8. The Braiser
Advertisement

Jon Stewart Sums Up Govt. Non-Shutdown Drama In Three Words: ‘I Hate You’

video
» 52 comments

As the nation begrudgingly emerged from the inevitable perfectly avoidable government shutdown that wasn’t Friday night, both Democrats and Republicans scrambled to make the ordeal into some sort of political victory. Tonight, Jon Stewart did his best to find the people on cable news asking the important questions about our budget, but instead delivered lines like “who came out ahead politically?” and “who are the real winners and losers?”

Stewart began at the start of the nail-biting ordeal, highlighting the various countdowns to the shutdown and increased certainty from cable news anchors that the government would be closed for business come midnight Friday. That, of course, failed to occur, thanks to what Stewart curmudgeonly described as “mundane pragmatic agreement… that should happen all the fucking time.” But with that over, what will that mean for the many non-essential programs that could be cut in the second round of negotiations? No one quite knows, because everyone was instead asking who the “real winners and losers” are, sometimes even with multiple choice (though with a pesky “none of the above” option). The conclusion? “Everybody wins by avoiding losing,” as one pundit put it, a line that drove Stewart to merely stare at the screen and whisper, “I hate you.”

The segment via Comedy Central below:

Follow us on Twitter.

Sign up for Mediaite's daily newsletter.

Email Twitter Facebook Digg Reddit Stumble Upon Yahoo Buzz LinkedIn Tumblr Delicious
  • http://TheDividedStatesBlog.com Publius219

    As usual, Jon Stewart in 5 minutes gets to the core of the problem better than 3 “news” networks with 24 hours a day to do so.

  • ModerateMan

    Publius219 said:
    As usual, Jon Stewart in 5 minutes gets to the core of the problem better than 3 “news” networks with 24 hours a day to do so.

    No. He portrayed the people who wanted a real attempt towards balancing the budget (the Tea Party) as the evil extremists who wanted to “hurt poor people”. Just another dishonest slandering against the people “on the other team” under the guise of humor. It’s getting old.

  • kvon

    Jon Stewart is a RINO!

  • http://TheDividedStatesBlog.com Publius219

    ModerateMan said:
    No. He portrayed the people who wanted a real attempt towards balancing the budget (the Tea Party) as the evil extremists who wanted to “hurt poor people”. Just another dishonest slandering against the people “on the other team” under the guise of humor. It’s getting old.

    Funny. I haven’t heard the Tea Party plan for immediate means-testing and raising of the Social Security age, which you’d think they’d want to do, given that Social Security is the singular biggest expenditure of the federal government.

  • Yoda002

    kvon said:
    Jon Stewart is a RINO!

    Joh Stewart is a true blue Republican he just pretends to be a lib.

  • ModerateMan

    Publius219 said:
    Funny. I haven’t heard the Tea Party plan for immediate means-testing and raising of the Social Security age, which you’d think they’d want to do, given that Social Security is the singular biggest expenditure of the federal government.

    That’s actually exactly what Rand Paul is talking about doing. The only people advocating for real cuts are the Tea Party. The Democrats only seem to be able to sit back and attack any attempt to balance the budget. I would be embarrassed of the Democratic leadership these days if I were a liberal. It’s sad.

  • Callingallcops11

    When will Washington and the media (Almost Everyone) focus on how to get the country on the right track instead of what party looks better? Both are still putting politics and special interests in front of the general public. Even a prompt threat of a government shutdown hasn’t stopped it.

    When the world is ending in 2012 Congress will be campaigning til the bitter end and the media will debate who is more likely to win the historic, first post-apocalyptic election.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Ellen-Carey-Rowe/683757018 ellie

    “Well it’s a good deal but some poor people remain oddly unfucked.”

    Nailed it!

  • ModerateMan

    ellie said:
    “Well it’s a good deal but some poor people remain oddly unfucked.” Nailed it!

    Face Palm:(

  • rubberneck

    Man, cable news is f-cked up.

  • RowdyHoward

    A bunch of dildos running our country.

  • Michael_T

    Does anyone else think that foreign aid, defense spending, too many military bases abroad and oil company subsidies should have at least been part of the discussion – not just programs that affect the poor (Planned Parenthood) and the middle class (Pell Grants).

    K-street wins again.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Ellen-Carey-Rowe/683757018 ellie

    Michael_T said:
    Does anyone else think that foreign aid, defense spending, too many military bases abroad and oil company subsidies should have at least been part of the discussion – not just programs that affect the poor (Planned Parenthood) and the middle class (Pell Grants).

    K-street wins again.

    It’s that special brand of Christianity. The f*ck the least among up kind.

  • Yoda002

    Michael_T said:
    Does anyone else think that foreign aid, defense spending, too many military bases abroad and oil company subsidies should have at least been part of the discussion – not just programs that affect the poor (Planned Parenthood) and the middle class (Pell Grants).

    K-street wins again.

    I agree we have 43% of the world’s military expenditures. The military Industrial complex that Ike feared has a lot of power over the government.

  • tatboy

    kvon said:
    Jon Stewart is a RINO!

    Yoda002 said:
    Joh Stewart is a true blue Republican he just pretends to be a lib.

    You two are morons…

  • Barack Must Go

    Another Jon Stewart aka Douchy McDouchebag propaganda hit piece where he highlights, for his own pants off listening, viewing pleasure, ” FOX NEWS ” as the dumb ones at the begininng, with a little fellow left wing bomb thrower filler in the middle, then he climaxes ( all over himself ) with those rat bastard Tea Party folks not happy every poor, minority in America was not maimed or murdered.

    This, what passes for comedy / political satire by the left only proves one thing. The Obama administration / democrat caucuss both sent out identical E-Mails to their people the othe week.

  • BeckFinallyDemoted

    Both Colbert and Stewart tore into Jon Kyl’s lie about Abortions being 90% of what Planned Parenthood does.
    Kyl’s office response. “That was not meant to be a factual statement”. lol
    The GOP makes it too eay for them.

    ___________________________________________
    Recent FOX lies…

    1 – A guy just hit me!!

    2 – Wisconsin poll numbers reversed

    3 – BECK: They are all Reform Jews

    4 – Mislabeled Ron Paul CPAC video

    5 – Obama refuses to “enforce” DOMA

    6 – BECK: Only FOX and Washington Times covered Pentagon report

    7 – Jennifer Griffin: “Earlier I reported that Fox news had not gone to Ghaddafi’s compound while I reported CNN and Reuters had in fact gone.
    I’ve have since learned that Fox did indeed go.”

    8 – DOOCY: “Obama is on vacation in Brazil.”
    His concession, days later: “OK, it’s not a spring break that he’s on down there, it is an important meeting with the leaders down there to drum up jobs.”

    9 – Jim McDermott “called the Constitution silly”

    10 – Brian Kilmeade – “If the President wrote a budget, we wouldn’t need a continuing resolution.” Wrong, for better or worse the President did submit a 2011 buget.

    11 – Beck: Says Michelle Obama has 43 people on her staff; Nancy Reagan had just 3.

    12 – STEVE DOOCY: And the thing about it that was audacious was the fact that he [Sen. Harry Reid] was talking about Planned Parenthood being this great provider where women can get blood pressure checks, and pap smears, and breast –

    BRIAN KILMEADE: Which you can get at Walgreens.

    DOOCY: –examinations. Exactly right.

  • Barack Must Go

    ellie said:
    It’s that special brand of Christianity. The f*ck the least among up kind.

    My aren’t we the racist little Christophobic bigot today?

  • Barack Must Go

    Michael_T said:
    Does anyone else think that foreign aid, defense spending, too many military bases abroad and oil company subsidies should have at least been part of the discussion – not just programs that affect the poor (Planned Parenthood) and the middle class (Pell Grants).

    K-street wins again.

    Your left wing bomb throwing bigotry proceeds you sir. Keep up the good fight.

  • Barack Must Go

    Callingallcops11 said:
    When will Washington and the media (Almost Everyone) focus on how to get the country on the right track instead of what party looks better? Both are still putting politics and special interests in front of the general public. Even a prompt threat of a government shutdown hasn’t stopped it.

    When the world is ending in 2012 Congress will be campaigning til the bitter end and the media will debate who is more likely to win the historic, first post-apocalyptic election.

    Sadly, per youtube never.

  • BeckFinallyDemoted

    Also this….

    Kilmeade: “Thank God Something Happened To Chris Farley Or He Else Chris Farley Would Have Been Me [On SNL].”

    Now I know Brian was saying he was glad Chris Farley was dead, but geez louise, doesn’t this idiot ever think before he talks?

  • Barack Must Go

    ModerateMan said:
    No. He portrayed the people who wanted a real attempt towards balancing the budget (the Tea Party) as the evil extremists who wanted to “hurt poor people”. Just another dishonest slandering against the people “on the other team” under the guise of humor. It’s getting old.

    And this jackass is where 90% of self proclaimed liberals between the age of 18 and 45 exclusively turn to get their REAL news. Then they’ll argue to the death the point he’s just a political saterist….. MAN.

  • Barack Must Go

    BeckFinallyDemoted said:
    Also this….

    Kilmeade: “Thank God Something Happened To Chris Farley Or He Else Chris Farley Would Have Been Me [On SNL].”

    Now I know Brian was saying he was glad Chris Farley was dead, but geez louise, doesn’t this idiot ever think before he talks?

    I believe you ought to be asking YOURSELF that same question.

  • Barack Must Go

    kvon said:
    Jon Stewart is a RINO!

    Filling in for your better half this evening I see. Carry on.

  • the real john t

    Barack Must Go said:
    My aren’t we the racist little Christophobic bigot today?

    I didn’t know Christianity was a race. Or do you even know what the word racist means?

  • Barack Must Go

    Publius219 said:
    Funny. I haven’t heard the Tea Party plan for immediate means-testing and raising of the Social Security age, which you’d think they’d want to do, given that Social Security is the singular biggest expenditure of the federal government.

    How often, once….twice…..more than half a dozen times have YOU personally EVER actually listened to ANYTHING the Tea Party has stated or stands for, as opposed to just parroting what you’ve heard Stewart, Colbert or Maher say about them?

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Ellen-Carey-Rowe/683757018 ellie

    Once again Obama comes up smelling like a rose. The Repubs and Dems not so much … http://tinyurl.com/65sn8jp

    And the American people want to save Planned Parenthood , the EPA, and the Affordable Health Care Act.

  • billwhit1357

    Jon is a Comedian, first and foremost. He is more Liberal but sometimes he gets down on both. I like him because of the comedy, not for seeking the truth and anyone who does, I would have to question their intelligence. As a moderate Conservative, I take no offence in his jokes, the guy is hilarious. Yes, sometimes he hits below the belt, more on the Right than the Left, but hell, he is a COMEDIAN, nothing else.

  • http://www.zazzle.com/talkingpoints NORBIT Jr.

    billwhit1357 said:
    Jon is a Comedian, first and foremost. He is more Liberal but sometimes he gets down on both. I like him because of the comedy, not for seeking the truth and anyone who does, I would have to question their intelligence. As a moderate Conservative, I take no offence in his jokes, the guy is hilarious. Yes, sometimes he hits below the belt, more on the Right than the Left, but hell, he is a COMEDIAN, nothing else.

    He’s also part of a multi-media narrative inculcating left-leaning “verities” into the nation’s zeitgeist.

  • Barack Must Go

    the real john t said:
    I didn’t know Christianity was a race. Or do you even know what the word racist means?

    Because of the way YOU left wing zealots treat Christianity, it’s now classified as a race. If you don’t believe me just ask me.

    Your question explains an awful lot about why so many liberal cowards feel perfectly comfortable bludgeoning Chriatianity right out in the open, even in broad daylight like you so often do.

    You say, well hay, it’s not a race so therefore I’m not really a racist……KA – WRONG…..you are.

  • Barack Must Go

    ellie said:
    Once again Obama comes up smelling like a rose. The Repubs and Dems not so much … http://tinyurl.com/65sn8jp

    And the American people want to save Planned Parenthood , the EPA, and the Affordable Health Care Act.

    CNN….800 adults, not voters or even likely voters? I don’t think so libs, but you go with it like a Lawrence O’Donnell monologue.

  • http://www.perceptionasreality.blogspot.com/ skoorbekim

    I thought Stewart was Colby’s turf…
    Is there dissension in the ranks?
    Should I expect an “EPIC” caffinated rant from Colbert soon?

  • valkyrie101

    NORBIT Jr. said:
    He’s also part of a multi-media narrative inculcating left-leaning “verities” into the nation’s zeitgeist.

    Yep. Well said.

  • Paul G

    Who is this guy Stewart? He’s SOoo HILARIOUS!!! He’s so funny, I’m crying. .He should be on Tv 24hrs a day! He’s gotta be the funniest guy EVER in the history of the world…He’s like a comedic genius. Ok..I’m done…..he’s an idiot.

  • http://www.perceptionasreality.blogspot.com/ skoorbekim

    skoorbekim said:
    I thought Stewart was Colby’s turf…Is there dissension in the ranks?Should I expect an “EPIC” caffinated rant from Colbert soon?

    Right on cue Colby…
    The caffinated clown appears @ 7:41…
    -Thanks

  • ChiliPeppersFan

    billwhit1357 said:
    Jon is a Comedian, first and foremost. He is more Liberal but sometimes he gets down on both. I like him because of the comedy, not for seeking the truth and anyone who does, I would have to question their intelligence. As a moderate Conservative, I take no offence in his jokes, the guy is hilarious. Yes, sometimes he hits below the belt, more on the Right than the Left, but hell, he is a COMEDIAN, nothing else.

    sure he is a comedian but because there are cases when his comedy spills over to reporting and/or affecting news as in the case of him humiliating the republicans for ignoring the health benefits for the 9/11 workers. it was his ‘jokes’ that got the attention of shep smith to shine a light on those hypocrites.

  • ChiliPeppersFan

    Paul G said:
    Who is this guy Stewart? He’s SOoo HILARIOUS!!! He’s so funny, I’m crying. .He should be on Tv 24hrs a day! He’s gotta be the funniest guy EVER in the history of the world…He’s like a comedic genius. Ok..I’m done…..he’s an idiot.

    with brilliant comedy like in your post, of course those stale jokes stewart tells will seem lame to you.

  • ChiliPeppersFan

    Barack Must Go said:
    Because of the way YOU left wing zealots treat Christianity, it’s now classified as a race. If you don’t believe me just ask me.

    gee mr. barack must go…is christianity a race?
    on a serious note, what the hell are you talking about.

  • ChiliPeppersFan

    Barack Must Go said:
    Barack Must Go says:

    you can tell he’s a moderate because he doesn’t use his middle name.

  • http://www.perceptionasreality.blogspot.com/ skoorbekim

    ellie said:
    And the American people want to save the Affordable Health Care Act.

    Not the Democrats in Missouri…
    http://www.nytimes.com/2011/04/12/us/politics/12missouri.html?_r=1&hpw#

  • THE REAL ROYAL KING

    Barack Must Go said:
    If you don’t believe me just ask me.

    One seldom encounters such arrogance so early in the morning.

  • ChiliPeppersFan

    THE REAL ROYAL KING said:
    One seldom encounters such arrogance so early in the morning.

    not true for me. my fruit loops claims to have 8 essential vitamins and minerals.

  • http://TheDividedStatesBlog.com Publius219

    Barack Must Go said:
    How often, once….twice…..more than half a dozen times have YOU personally EVER actually listened to ANYTHING the Tea Party has stated or stands for, as opposed to just parroting what you’ve heard Stewart, Colbert or Maher say about them?

    I’m not your caricature. Where’s SS in the totally unrealistic Ryan plan?

  • RichS

    ModerateMan said:
    No. He portrayed the people who wanted a real attempt towards balancing the budget (the Tea Party) as the evil extremists who wanted to “hurt poor people”. Just another dishonest slandering against the people “on the other team” under the guise of humor. It’s getting old.

    Well, and you expected Publius to dispute that? Remember he is one of the leading liberal BS artists who posts here.

  • RichS

    THE REAL ROYAL KING said:
    One seldom encounters such arrogance so early in the morning.

    Yep, it sounds almost as arrogant as you do any time of the day.

  • Barack Must Go

    ChiliPeppersFan said:
    gee mr. barack must go…is christianity a race?
    on a serious note, what the hell are you talking about.

    My statement is pretty self explanatory really. Sorry I left my dog whistle in my other pants or I would attempt to translate what I said from English to something you could readily understand. Maybe next time.

  • Barack Must Go

    Publius219 said:
    I’m not your caricature. Where’s SS in the totally unrealistic Ryan plan?

    The problem here is YOU view the world from a Barack Obama’s still the president state of mind. You need to totally perge those thought comepletely away or nothing here in ” real ” America is ever going to make any sense to you.

  • Barack Must Go

    THE REAL ROYAL KING said:
    One seldom encounters such arrogance so early in the morning.

    Why thank you…..thank you very much for saying that, Coming from you it means a……….. basically nothing at all.

  • http://TheDividedStatesBlog.com Publius219

    Barack Must Go said:
    The problem here is YOU view the world from a Barack Obama’s still the president state of mind..

    You’re right. I do. You know why? Because Barack Obama is still the President. And you’re still an idiot. I think that quote sums up your grip with reality–or lackthereof– quite well.

  • BarneyFranken

    Jon Stewart and all his fellow rich white men who are clamoring for higher taxes on rich white men should take the lead and voluntarily give 90% of their income to the government.

    There, crisis solved.

  • X-3

    Mediaite,

    Kindly tell us how much John Stewart, Bill Maher, Keith Olbermann, Chris Matthews, and David Letterman are paying you to run story after story about them?

  • hgarner2000

    I poke fun at Stewart’s fans on occasion. In my experience some say he’s liberal, others say he’s a moderate and still others that he has the truth. Actually, everyone has the truth, it’s just that some are more certain of it than others and, hence, more entitled to the satisfaction of self-righteous indignation. But for me, the basis of Stewart’s comedy is the importance of being reasonable. And so, being reasonable allows enough wiggle room on the political spectrum for me to laugh my ass off although I may not always touch down in exactly the same spot.

© 2012 Mediaite, LLC | About Us | Advertise | Newsletter | Jobs | Privacy | User Agreement | Disclaimer | Power Grid FAQ | Contact | Archives | RSS RSS
Dan Abrams, Founder | Power Grid by Sound Strategies | Hosting by Datagram