The Madoff Prison Interview, Part I.

Bernie Madoff gave his first prison interview (sorry Barbara, Diane, Matt) to the lawyer representing the victims suing his wife, sons, and brother, but it was something of a dud.

San Francisco lawyer Joseph Cotchett told ABC News that Bernie was surprised he was able to get away with it for so long. “There were several times that I met with the SEC and thought they got me,” Madoff said to Cotchett from the federal prison in Butner, N.C., where he is serving his 150-year sentence (is the plan to keep him cryogenically frozen in jail?).

We also learn that Bernie looks really buff. Hey, are you working out?

One of the theories being batted around is that Madoff wanted to get caught. His secretary of more than 20 years, Eleanor Squillari, said as much to Vanity Fair. If that’s true, he must have been incredibly frustrated by the S.E.C.’s incompetence.

You could almost imagine Madoff’s meetings with the commission:

Bernie: What does it take to get arrested in this town? $50 billion not enough? I can grow that. Just cuff me now, please.
S.E.C.: Mr. Madoff, now why would we do that?
Bernie: Because I am running the biggest Ponzi scam in history, ripping off charities, philanthropies, universities, Elie Wiesel, Mort Zuckerman, and the New York Mets.
S.E.C.: Thanks for your time, Sir. We will, errr, look into that. Fascinating. Have a nice day.

It may not console his victims very much, but if Madoff truly did want to get caught, he was already living in purgatory.

Jim Impoco is a New York-based writer and a former editor of the Sunday Business section of the New York Times and deputy editor of Portfolio. This is the first of occasional posts on Mediaite about the financial press. Please send tips or comments to jimpoco@mediaite.com.

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