John Mayer’s Penis Is A Racist Wonderland
» 15 comments
Well it’s official – John Mayer is a complete and total pig. A very quotable, jaw-droppingly honest, hilarious, fairly introspective pig. But a pig nonetheless.
He did a lengthy interview with Playboy in which he discussed his racist penis, having sex with Jessica Simpson, dropped an n-bomb and much much more. Here are some highlights.
So here’s the full Playboy interview. There’s a whole lot there. But here may be the most insane quote to come out of the entire interview:
My dick is sort of like a white supremacist. I’ve got a Benetton heart and a fuckin’ David Duke cock. I’m going to start dating separately from my dick.
John Mayer has a “David Duke cock,” ladies and gentleman.
Now the singer/songwriter/tabloid fodder has not shied away from speaking his mind in interviews before, and it has led to some memorable exchanges. But this may be the height of his ‘he’s so edgy and refreshing’ honesty. While we’re talking about David Duke, here’s Mayer dropping an n-bomb while describing how much black people love him: “And by the way, it’s sort of a contradiction in terms, because if you really had a hood pass, you could call it a nigger pass. Why are you pulling a punch and calling it a hood pass if you really have a hood pass?”
MSNBC contributor Toure has been dressing down Mayer on Twitter this morning (no response yet from the musician). To the above comment he writes, “Whatever you wanna call it, you don’t have it any more.”
Update at 5pm: Mayer is apologizing on Twitter. Here’s some of what he wrote:
And while I’m using today for looking at myself under harsh light, I think it’s time to stop trying to be so raw in interviews…
It started as an attempt to not let the waves of criticism get to me, but it’s gotten out of hand and I’ve created somewhat of a monster.
I wanted to be a blues guitar player. And a singer. And a songwriter. Not a shock jock. I don’t have the stomach for it.
Again, because I don’t want anyone to think I’m equivocating: I should have never said the word and I will never say it again.
Alright more from the Quotable Mr. Mayer -
• Of Jessica Simpson:
That girl, for me, is a drug. And drugs aren’t good for you if you do lots of them. Yeah, that girl is like crack cocaine to me…Sexually it was crazy. That’s all I’ll say. It was like napalm, sexual napalm…Have you ever been with a girl who made you want to quit the rest of your life? Did you ever say, “I want to quit my life and just fuckin’ snort you? If you charged me $10,000 to fuck you, I would start selling all my shit just to keep fucking you.”
That last line is actually from his upcoming single, “Your Body Is A Fuckin’ Wonderland And Shit”.
• Let’s go back to race – and specifically, Kerry Washington:
She’s superhot, and she’s also white-girl crazy. Kerry Washington would break your heart like a white girl. Just all of a sudden she’d be like, “Yeah, I sucked his dick. Whatever.” And you’d be like, “What? We weren’t talking about that.”
I’m like “what?” right now, so…
• And now, to Jennifer Aniston:
I wish I could be with her. But I can’t change the fact that I need to be 32…That woman was the most communicative, sweetest, kindest person. When people hear the record, I hope the songs make them think about their lives, not my life. Like, when you listen to Coldplay, do you think about Gwyneth Paltrow? I don’t write songs in order to stick it to my exes. I don’t release underground dis tracks
See, I always thought Chris Martin was like the British John Mayer.
• We’ll just let this entire exchange sink in for you:
PLAYBOY: What does the word womanizer mean to you?
MAYER: Well, wouldn’t a womanizer have dated more than two girls in two years?
PLAYBOY: You and Aniston got back together and broke up again in 2009. How many women did you sleep with in the eight months after the breakup?
MAYER: I’m going to say four or five. No more.
PLAYBOY: That’s a reasonable number.
MAYER: But even if I said 12, that’s a reasonable number. So is 15. Here’s the thing: I get less ass now than I did when I was in a local band. Because now I don’t like jumping through hoops. It’s been so long since I’ve taken a random girl home. I don’t want to have to submit myself for approval. I don’t want to audition. I’d rather come home and edge my shit out for 90 minutes. At this point, before I can have sex I need to know somebody. Unless she’s a 14 out of 10.
John Mayer has standards people, unless she’s really hot.
• And finally, a little about the true love of John Mayer’s life – John Mayer:
What that explains is that I’m more comfortable in my imagination than I am in actual human discovery. The best days of my life are when I’ve dreamed about a sexual encounter with someone I’ve already been with. When that happens, I cannot lay off myself.
The End…to something.
> Update: The interview was conducted by Mediaite contributor Rob Tannenbaum.
> Update at 5pmET: GossipCop points out Mayer has apologized for his use of the n-word.
—–
» Follow Steve Krakauer on Twitter
Sign up for Mediaite’s daily newsletter.
Chris Matthews Retapes Sherrod Segment For 7PM Hardball Rerun After 5PM Flap
Stephen Colbert: Basil Marceaux Will Have A Beer With You Whether You Want It Or Not
PBS Defends 'Palinese' Segment Mocking Sarah Palin
Meet Gubernatorial Candidate Basil Marceaux: Proof America's Democracy Is Still Healthy
Now This: Naked Pictures Of 'Sexy Russian Spy' Anna Chapman
Jon Stewart To Fox News: 'Nothing Obama Does Will Ever Make You F*cking Happy' »146
Judge Stops Arizona From Enforcing Most Controversial Part Of Immigration Law »132
Shirley Sherrod Saga Continues: She "Will Sue" Andrew Breitbart (Update) »129
Laura Ingraham And John Stossel Delight In Liberal Hypocrisy On The Factor »103
Howard Dean Fires Back At Fox News' Response To Racism Accusation »101
Job hunting?
Use our proprietary jobs tool to access the largest pool of jobs aggregated from around the country.
More Online/Print:
Straight Outta Minority Report: New “Recorded Future” Product Predicts Future Events?
Gay Media Giant Threatens Former Employee Over Facebook Posts
The publisher of the Advocate and Out magazines--Here Media--has sent a letter threatening legal action to a former employee of its skin magazines for making negative comments about the company on his Facebook page.
Twitter As Mood Ring: How Tweets Can Be Used To Study Feelings Nationwide
Good News/Bad News: NY Subways To Get WiFi And Cell Phone Service
Plans are in place to bring WiFi and mobile phone service to the subways of New York. Sure, this announcement comes after a summer where budget constraints have caused lines to be discontinued and the MTA has considered no longer selling unlimited tickets but, hey, now I don't have to wait till I get all the way to work to surf porn on the internet!
RSS
15 comments
Who is John Mayer?
LOL I kinda feel sorry for Steve, who has to summarize this crap for his loyal readers…..
(in the future, you can pass…seriously!)
Wow, if only the women who slept with him had standards.
Jelperman – Who is John Mayer? How about a total asshole…for starters.
Next time they should just interview his dick.It would probably be a better interview.
“I’ve got a Benetton heart and a fuckin’ David Duke cock.”
I have always considered David Duke a very small man….may the analogy fits after all.
So much rambling. Much of what he said in unintelligible.
Hey Facebook user –
I had a lot of fun writing this one! Summarizing the crap was a good time…
No comment from the females? C’mon, what say you? ( sorry facebook user if you are female)
OK, back from reading the entire interview. Mayer comes off a bit more sympathetic in that context ( and I really, really wanted to hate him!), As an erstwhile musician myself, I’ve always thought of him as an excellent guitar player and a god-awful boring songwriter/ singer.
So who is this guy Mayer? Is he a pop singer? They all say stuff like that ,then apologize saying “oh I was high on Mara-wanna.”
Jessica Simpson’s dance card suddenly, and inexplicably, became full.
Enough with the tortured, brooding, brilliant-yet-misunderstood singer/songwriter. In his effort to be “honest,” Mayer, once again, predictably reinforces the stereotype.
I’ve downloaded this interview of his at rapidshare search engine and completely agree with the authour of the article. What man would discuss his sexual partnters in such a way?
Yeah, John. Love the guy but man, is he a dick.
Hmmmm…Cherry Picking? Anyone that is reading Mr.Krakauers article should read the Playboy article in full.
PC is DEAD…let it rot in its grave. The only thing about this incident that is regretable is that John Mayer bowed to criticism and appologized. As far as this quote… “I’ve got a Benetton heart and a fuckin’ David Duke cock”…I’m quite sure that there are just as many that would call him a pussy for the “Benetton heart” remark accept they tend not to be of the PC crowd (he does seem to want to distance himself from the one eye tyrant…guess you missed the joke).
The “N-Bomb”? When black men and woman stop using the word THEN they will have earned the right to ask “white people” to stop using the word. Seems to me Mr. Krakauer you are among the herd of people embarrased to be white and applogetic to blacks for something that you were never part of.
Was Mr.Mayers remarks about woman offensive to you? You may want to hear what the girls say when men aren’t present. You would have a better perspective on who says what and where.
John Mayer had the “balls” to speak his mind. Too bad he capitulated to the weak, “highminded” (laughable) and hippocritical PC crowd.
Mr Krakauer, you were offended by Mr. Mayers remarks just as I am offended by your childish article. I realize that you are paid to write your comments and perspectives and so you have. Don’t like what someone has to say? Keep your nose on your face where it belongs. Your article was more obnoxious that John Mayers interveiw was and no where near as honest.
» Login » Register