Watch Real-Life Hamburglar Break Into DC Five Guys and Casually Grill Himself a Burger


Look out, McDonald’s, it seems regional burger chain Five Guys has stolen one of your most loyal customers! Police in Washington, DC have released video of a real-life Hamburglar who broke into a Five Guys burger joint in March, poured himself an ice-cold fountain drink, then casually cooked himself a couple of burgers in the restaurant’s darkened kitchen. Just how cool was this extralegal customer? While he worked the grill, the guy took a phone call:

If the cops ever do catch up with the outlaw Burgermeister, that could end up being a very expensive, very un-Happy Meal:

D.C. police have asked for the public’s help finding a man who slipped into the Five Guys in Columbia Heights and helped himself to an after-hours meal.

An award of up to $1,000 is being offered for information leading to man’s arrest and indictment. He faces a charge of burglary for the surreptitious repast.

Police said the incident happened between 3 a.m. and 5 a.m. March 18. The fast-casual restaurant is located in the 1400 block of Irving Street in Northwest.

If you see this man, approach with extreme caution, and let him know there’s no way that grill was hot enough to get a proper sear on those burgers.

The chain does come highly recommended. Early in his presidency, Barack Obama caused a media sensation with a stop at a DC Five Guys, and has since become well-known for the guilty pleasure he takes in such junk-food junkets.

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