Finally, Here’s The Hardcore Paul Ryan Rap You’ve Been Waiting For (Featuring Jesus And Ayn Rand!)

Ah, the election year songs. There’s nothing more fun than these now traditional videos featuring people singing about or as the year’s big candidates. We’ve had a McCain Girl, an Obama Girl, and even an Obama Boy. And now, finally, we’ve gotten a perfect Romney/Ryan song. Even more amusingly, this is the first tune of the bunch that’s going to require a parental warning.

The folks over at the comedy site Jest have brought us the “Hardcore Paul Ryan Rap,” a new video in which Paul Ryan busts a rhyme to brag that he’s a combination of Ron Paul with Ryan Seacrest’s face. Who’da thunk that Paul Ryan would be such a hip hop superstar? Crazy. The fact that Mitt Romney would just be awkwardly doing the robot in the background? Yeah, that’s much more believable.

The lyrics are pretty great (if foul-mouthed). Here’s a sample:

“I’m from the streets of Wisconsin,
District One represent,
I’ll represent extra hard,
If you’re the One Percent,

And, if you think I’m a prick,
I’ve got a stick you can picket with,
But, shit, at least admit,
This is one pretty sick ticket, bitch!

Guy One runs with more money than God
Guy Two comes with a P90X bod”

I’m sold. And this is even before Jesus Christ and Ayn Rand appear to join the backing band.

Check out the video from Jest below:

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