Holy Bible! Conservatives Target Word of God for Liberal Bias

by Tommy Christopher | 2:56 pm, October 6th, 2009

» 7 comments

bible While cries of “Liberal bias!” are nothing new, especially to a media blog, it seems the religious right may have bitten off more than it can chew this time. Targeting MSNBC, CNN, or even the New York Times is one thing, but apparently there’s an “in the tank” source bigger than all of them: Almighty God.

At first blush, you might think they’re trying to fend off more recent translations like the “Good News Bible,” or some ultra-PC Gay Bible. Nope. The Conservative Bible Project, despite all evidence to the contrary, is not a joke. The “brainchild” of the Conservapedia, the project seeks to translate the King James Bible into a version that’s devoid of “liberal bias.”

It gets funnier, though. The project cites “lack of precision in the original language” as one of the reasons this new translation is necessary. The ultimate in hubris, though, is their actual attempt to rename God, preferring “the word ‘Lord’ rather than ‘Jehovah’ or ‘Yahweh’ or ‘Lord God.’”

And how does this intrepid group plan on besting the Holy Trinity? Wikipedia-style! The translation has already begun, which gives us unique insight into how the Bible was probably originally written. It’s certain that, as with John Chapter 3 verse 33, John probably got assessments from God like “This needs work.”

In fairness to the right, it is difficult to imagine any mainstream conservatives, or Christians, signing on for this. I asked my friend Ed Morrissey, who qualifies on both counts, what he thought of the project. He gave me a preview of what he’ll be posting on the subject later:

It depends on how one considers the Bible. If a person just views it as a series of parables with immense wisdom on life and truth but written by men for their own purposes, then a “conservative version” is as objectionable as making 10 Things I Hate About You from Shakespeare’s Taming of the Shrew — which is to say that the offensiveness depends on the final version. (For the record, I liked 10 Things, which I thought was both a clever and goofy take on the Bard, so that’s not a dig.)

However, if one believes the Bible to be the Word of God written for His purposes, which I do, then the idea of recalibrating the language to suit partisan political purposes in this age is pretty offensive — just as offensive as they see the “liberal bias” in existing translations.

I agree with Ed that this is offensive, and I’d even say this might merit a lightning strike or two. The creators of this project seem to either know this and don’t care, or have failed to understand their own page:

And if any man shall take away from the words of the book of this prophecy, God shall take away his part out of the book of life, and out of the holy city, and from the things which are written in this book.

You have been warned.

Maybe they’re waiting for a better translation.

Conservative Bible, Conservative Bible Group, Conservative Bible Project, Conservative Bible Version, Conservative New Bible, Politics News, Tommy Christopher

m

The liberal bias meme should just get buried with Rick Rolling and lolcats (lolcats btw also have a Bible translation project http://www.lolcatbible.com/index.php?title=Main_Page)
Magister

Are they translating the King James translation or have they gone back to the original text.

I mean, if I’m understanding this properly, t’ll be more like turning 10 Things into a special episode of Blossom and instead of having a professionally-written script, the words will come from caller snippets into Larry King’s old Mutual show at 2AM.
http://www.facebook.com/people/Alex-Lawson/5321694 Alex Lawson

They are going to have to remove the entire book of Acts.
Acts 4:32-5:11

The Believers Share Their Possessions
All the believers were one in heart and mind. No one claimed that any of his possessions was his own, but they shared everything they had. With great power the apostles continued to testify to the resurrection of the Lord Jesus, and much grace was upon them all. There were no needy persons among them. For from time to time those who owned lands or houses sold them, brought the money from the sales and put it at the apostles’ feet, and it was distributed to anyone as he had need. Joseph, a Levite from Cyprus, whom the apostles called Barnabas (which means Son of Encouragement), sold a field he owned and brought the money and put it at the apostles’ feet.

Now a man named Ananias, together with his wife Sapphira, also sold a piece of property. With his wife’s full knowledge he kept back part of the money for himself, but brought the rest and put it at the apostles’ feet.

Then Peter said, “Ananias, how is it that Satan has so filled your heart that you have lied to the Holy Spirit and have kept for yourself some of the money you received for the land? Didn’t it belong to you before it was sold? And after it was sold, wasn’t the money at your disposal? What made you think of doing such a thing? You have not lied to men but to God.”

When Ananias heard this, he fell down and died. And great fear seized all who heard what had happened. Then the young men came forward, wrapped up his body, and carried him out and buried him.

About three hours later his wife came in, not knowing what had happened. Peter asked her, “Tell me, is this the price you and Ananias got for the land?”

“Yes,” she said, “that is the price.”

Peter said to her, “How could you agree to test the Spirit of the Lord? Look! The feet of the men who buried your husband are at the door, and they will carry you out also.”

At that moment she fell down at his feet and died. Then the young men came in and, finding her dead, carried her out and buried her beside her husband. Great fear seized the whole church and all who heard about these events
mkh4

One would suppose The Sermon on the Mount will have to be eliminated as well…. I mean, Jesus sets out quite the social agenda with this particular speaking engagement – and shared FOOD with the crowd… how insane is that??? Speaking to a large crowd about taking care of those who cannot take care of themselves, being humble and meek, putting others needs before your own… far too liberal to keep!

One must assume this too shall pass.
http://www.facebook.com/people/Alex-Lawson/5321694 Alex Lawson

In fact they might have to just remove the entire Jesus character, he is pretty radical.
claybarham

The Bible the Pilgrims brought with them to America, which was our first Consitution, would be a good choice, i.e., the Geneva Bible, It was the one with Calvin’s commentaries that enfuriated King James so he would have to make his “authorized” version which still allowed for elite intermediaries to rule the many in Jesus’ name. I’d vote for that original Geneva Bible myself, as it set the law that Americans followed at the start of our nation. Even John Adams, not the most libertarian of our Founders, suggested that we owed to that Bible and Calvin the best our nation produced.
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