“What is the best thing in the world?” you are likely asking, chin resting on hand. Cake? Puppies? A cake in the shape of a puppy? A puppy in the shape of a cake? The answer is “No, wrong, none of those things!” Because the best thing in the world is Nancy Grace doing a cartwheel in a swishy gold dress. I mean. Right? Obvious answer.

Live TV is always kind of a gamble, particularly because it offers people a platform to promote their intense feelings for Dancing with the Stars and/or David Arquette. Seriously, you simply never know when someone is going to interrupt a live broadcast to sing the praises of America’s favorite Arquette, not including Patricia, Rosanna or Alexis.

And that’s exactly what happened Monday afternoon when CNN sent Maggie Lake out to the streets of Manhattan to report on the release of a new biography on Apple’s Steve Jobs.

You can say this about Nancy Grace: she seems to be really enjoying her time on Dancing With The Stars. And she’s using her official YouTube channel to show what ABC’s cameras aren’t capturing — progress reports on that week’s dances and impromptu moments with her makeup team. This week, DWTS had an 80′s theme, and Grace, going down Memory Lane, revealed that she was a high school cheerleader back in Georgia. She even whipped out a cheer to prove it. After surviving the cut and back at work, someone pressed Grace for an encore. And she obliged. right there in the CNN lobby:

Nancy Grace and her partner, Tristan MacManus, advanced to the next round of Dancing With The Stars on Tuesday, sealing their spot in the Final Eight and avoiding elimination. After the voting was announced, Nancy and Tristan took to Nancy’s personal YouTube account to thank fans for their support

For some reason, people get passionate about Dancing with the Stars. Who knows if it’s the stars or the dancing that’s to blame but, when people aren’t frothing at the mouth over contestant choices, they’re shooting TV sets over the results. The latest episode in the headline grabbing show is an anthrax scare that occurred after a letter containing white powder was mailed to the studio.

On Monday night, the world was shocked, shocked when, after all the hand-wringing over Chaz Bono’s fiendish insistence on existing, it actually seemed that HLN’s Nancy Grace was the one to plunge our nation’s children into depravity. The worst depravity of all in fact, the depravity of a briefly viewed human female breast! However, Grace has spoken out, denying that that slightly different shade of pink that we saw for a second was actually her nipple.

Thank God. I guess my children won’t be going to Hell after all.

On last night’s Dancing with the Stars, legal analyst Nancy Grace shocked America with half a second of breast exposure. Given the precarious moral nature of this season of DWTS to some conservatives given the presence of Chaz Bono there, Jon Stewart posited tonight that the biggest story of the day would get major coverage on Fox News, where the transgendered contestant was called dangerous to children by resident Dr. Keith Ablow.

Since its premiere last week, opponents of this season’s Dancing with the Stars have claimed that the images broadcast therein could corrupt and severely traumatize children. All the griping around Chaz Bono seemed to leave the Dancing with the Stars unprepared for the real threat: Nancy Grace‘s breasts, escaping the shackles of her dress after a fairly energetic performance.

Chaz Bono appeared on ABC’s Nightline to discuss his contentious debut as the first transgendered contestant on Dancing With The Stars . Bono told anchor Cynthia McFadden he’s had a great time so far being on the show, “It’s the hardest job you’ll ever love. It’s like the Army!”

After a series of controversies spearheaded by conservative viewers and Fox News contributor Dr. Keith Ablow (who was on The O’Reilly Factor tonight decrying said debut), the moment for transgender activist Chaz Bono to make his rhythmic debut came tonight. Hide the kids and the gullible, Ablow fans, because Bono did what he came to do on the program– dance.

Tonight’s premiere of Dancing with the Stars brought with it several surprising names, perhaps none moreso (in a confusing way) than HLN legal maven Nancy Grace. Grace kicked off her run on the program with a cha-cha that began with Grace sliding out of a desk in a glittery white gown and making plenty of conservative, albeit difficult to follow, steps around her partner.

Tonight marks the much-discussed debut of transgender activist Chaz Bono on Dancing with the Stars, and his biggest opponent on cable news, Fox News contributor Dr. Keith Ablow, marked the occasion with a visit to the O’Reilly Factor doubling down on his claim that children watching Bono could be incited to change sexes.

Fresh from her confrontational interview with Dr. Keith Ablow over his transphobic Chaz Bono editorial, Fox News anchor Megyn Kelly appeard on The O’Reilly Factor to discuss her criticism of her Fox colleague. While allowing that Ablow is a “good guy,” Kelly wouldn’t back down, and even called Ablow’s rhetoric “irresponsible and dangerous,” noting that transpeople are already “persecuted,” and that “there are people that will react to that the next time they see a transgender person at the McDonald’s.”

Chaz Bono was already considered to be one of most public transgendered individuals in pop culture history, but now that he is going to be participating in the ABC’s Dancing With The Stars, he has become somewhat of a political lightening rod fortransgendered persons. Fox News contributor Dr. Keith Ablow has been quite vocal in his dismay at Bono’s inclusion on DWTS, calling it “toxic” to our children, and appeared on America Live to defend his denunciation to host Megyn Kelly.

This is obviously not your typical media post. While I personally don’t care for TV shows about dancing, the idea of cable news hosts, known best for their political coverage, participating on such a show is an interesting spectacle to behold. It falls in that pantheon of “wait, what?” TV moments like Larry King rolling with Snoop Dogg or Glenn Beck engaging in some awkward sexual banter with Rick Santorum. It is a class of television all its own.

Hide your kids! You may have already heard that Chaz Bono, the transgendered former daughter of Cher and Sonny Bono who recently and very publicly underwent gender reassignment surgery, is going to be a contestant on ABC’s extremely popular Dancing with the Stars, where he’ll be competing with a female dance partner. And some people are pissed.

Psychiatrist and frequent Fox News contributor Dr. Keith Ablow reacted to the news with an editorial piece denouncing ABC’s decision and, indeed, expressing denying that transgendered individuals even exist.

Today, ABC announced the line-up for the upcoming (and 13th) season. The 12 “celebrity” crew, motley as ever, includes George Clooney‘s ex-girl friend Elizabetta Canalis, Kardashian brother Rob, and Casey Anthony obsessive Nancy Grace, among others. And with the competition still several weeks away, the announcement page has already attracted hundreds and hundreds of commenters, the majority of whom seem concerned to see Chaz Bono‘s name on the list.

Hot off her star turn on ABC’s Dancing with the Stars, Bristol Palin has landed her own show. Or, as the New York Post puts it, “Bristol Palin’s assault on the reality show world continues.”

BIO has announced the deal, describing the latest Palin family TV adventure as a 10-episode half hour series (sadly, it’s still untitled) that puts single mom Bristol in Los Angeles, where she cares for son Tripp, works at a charity, and lives–seriously–with two former child stars turned singers:

What does it take to elicit groans from the production  staff of Fox & Friends? Co-host Brian Kilmeade found out Tuesday morning, as he offered a cruel assessment of well-liked actress Kirstie Alley‘s fall on Monday night’s Dancing with the Stars. Although Alley’s partner, Maksim Chmerkovskiy, insists the fall was all his fault, Kilmeade diagnosed the problem as “too much weight…” before adding, after that chorus of groans, “He put on too much weight!”

Well, it looks like we won’t get to see a sexy, winking dance set to Screamin’ Jay Hawkins’ “I Put a Spell on You” starring Christine O’Donnell after all (seriously, you know this would have happened). Our friends at Gossip Cop have gotten the exclusive confirmation that O’Donnell will be sitting out this season of Dancing with the Stars. Damn. Now I guess I won’t watch Dancing with the Stars.*

*That statement has nothing to do with Christine O’Donnell being on it and entirely to do with the fact that it’s Dancing with the Stars.

C’mon, Facebook, do us all a solid and tell Christine O’Donnell to take the invitation from ABC and become a contestant on Dancing With The Stars. Just look at the brilliant photo illustration from today’s New York Daily News and tell me you don’t want this as much as we do. What’s even more tempting, the Daily News reports, is O’Donnell’s own assurance–posted to her Facebook page–that’s she’s a lousy dancer:

As you may have heard, Bristol Palin recently appeared on ABC’s Dancing with the Stars, and she did pretty well–defying the judges and rising to the final three. Ultimately, she and her partner finished in third place.

Well, the against-all-odds success of Sarah Palin‘s kid apparently boiled the blood of some DWTS viewers, who weren’t satisfied simply moaning to friends, family and neighbors, nor even to picking up the phone and complaining to ABC. No. They went to the government.

The back-and-forth between Bristol Palin and Countdown host Keith Olbermann continued Friday morning, as Palin hit a local Alaska radio show to discuss her “Worst Person in the World” win. While the eldest Palin daughter was generally a good sport about the whole thing, hosts Bob & Mark laid it on pretty thick, and secured agreement from Palin that Olbermann is, indeed, a “dick.”

Bristol also displayed a willingness, even an eagerness, to appear on Countdown and let Olbermann take his best shots at her.

It’s been nearly 24 hours since we posted our last story about Sarah Palin—yeah, we can hardly believe it either. Thankfully, now we can end our long silence with a juicy news item. Dancing With the Stars Season 11 contestant and comedian Margaret Cho published a blog post yesterday in which she offered her take on Bristol Palin‘s television debut—one that claims the teen wouldn’t have been Dancing at all if a certain Mama Grizzly hadn’t pressured her into it.

If you didn’t know any better, you might think that Dancing With the Stars is one of the most polarizing issues in America today. It’s inspired conspiracy theories, threatening mail, and gunfire. You can now add name-calling to the list: on a recent visit The Joy Behar Show, comedian Sandra Bernhard commented on Bristol Palin‘s post-DWTS activity thusly: “She is such a hooker!”