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Fox News’ The Five Helpfully Explains Why Boys Can Have Casual Sex But Girls Totally Can’t

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» 60 comments

So how did Fox News’ new show The Five end their first week? With an episode in which Andrea Tantaros explained how sick she was of Casey Anthony (while introducing an entire segment on Casey Anthony), Greg Gutfeld dressed up in a beat poetry outfit to read Esquire’s “How Can We Not Love Obama?” article, and Bob Beckel said Jose Baez looks like “a drug deal I once had.” They also had one of the most uncomfortable television segments I’ve ever seen in which Gutfeld explained why actress Mila Kunis was a great American and Tantaros explained why ladies just have too many emotions and stuff for casual sex.

The segment was based on the contents of an interview Kunis did with GQ. After lauding her agreement to accompany a marine to a dance, Gutfeld read what the actress had to say (which is good because I’m sure most readers were distracted by the accompanying photo) about the titular type of relationship in her new movie No Strings Attached Between Friends with Benefits:

“GQ: Your new movie is called Friends with Benefits. Ever been in one of those relationships?

Mila Kunis: Oy. I haven’t, but I can give you my stance on it: It’s like communism—good in theory, in execution it fails. Friends of mine have done it, and it never ends well. Why do people put themselves through that torture?”

First off, the panel was very, very excited that Kunis takes a hard stand against Communism since, as Gutfeld explained, so many Hollywood types stupidly praise it (Gee, wouldn’t it be great if we made some kind of list, like a black list or whatever to round up these dirty Hollywood Reds?). They were also heartened by her other comment (except, of course, for Beckel who helpfully discussed how much fun he had in the time period “after the pill and before AIDS”). Tantaros was especially heartened since girls just can’t handle that kind of thing.

“TANTAROS: Look, women can not have sex like men, Bob, and this notion that is perpetuated by Hollywood and MTV that’s all, ‘Women, just do what you want,’ they can not function like men. It always ends badly. Every woman out there knows what I’m talking about.

BECKEL: Women can’t have sex like men? You can last all night! Look at Greg!

TANTAROS: How many women have called you up all night, stalking you, crying?

BECKEL: Not many.”

Finally someone says it the way it really is! You hear that, ladies? Don’t do what you want! Only us guys have the right parts for that kind of thing.

Watch the clip from Fox News below:

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  • expatpatriot

    A race to the bottom of the gene pool.

  • insideguy

    I watched this show it was horrible. It was kinda like watching red eye except even less funny. They didn’t talk about anything for an hour.

  • Cecelia

    “Finally someone says it the way it really is! You hear that, ladies? Don’t do what you want! Only us guys have the right parts for that kind of thing.”

    You guys absolutely do!

    You have to be the most disingenuous idiot in the world to claim there is no difference in sexual attitudes between men and women!

  • BFD

    Why isn’t this show called The View 2?

  • expatpatriot

    insideguy said:
    I watched this show it was horrible. It was kinda like watching red eye except even less funny. They didn’t talk about anything for an hour.

    I’m not sure it’s possible to be less funny than Red Eye.

  • Cecelia

    “First off, the panel was very, very excited that Kunis takes a hard stand against Communism since, as Gutfeld explained, so many Hollywood types stupidly praise it (Gee, wouldn’t it be great if we made some kind of list, like a black list or whatever to round up these dirty Hollywood Reds?)”

    Nah… didn’t work. That’s why you see so many movies about the human drama of Stalin, Beria, and the travails USSR exiles like Solzhenitsyn and Sakharov.

    Who are they when you can do another McCarthy movie?

    Perhaps there’s some gulag for the politically incorrect Kunis, Jon?

  • Rokker

    Only FOX could find five goofballs that make Glenn Beck look sane in comparison.

  • writer

    The left seems to make a habit of watching shows they hate.

  • Nature Freak

    There are men who can easily have casual sex, there are men (lots of actually) who emotionally can not.
    There are women who easily can have casual sex, there are women who emtionally can not.
    A majority of prostitutes/ sex workers are women. Interesting.
    Human beings are individuals. We are all unique. This is BS one size fits all pop psychology.
    Human sexuality is complicated and can not be reduced to trite statements such as the ones by Tantaros.

  • kvon

    More things that are more pressing than the News Corp implosion.

  • Paleoconservatarian

    Cecelia said:
    Nah… didn’t work. That’s why you see so many movies about the human drama of Stalin, Beria, and the travails USSR exiles like Solzhenitsyn and Sakharov.

    Who are they when you can do another McCarthy movie?

    Perhaps there’s some gulag for the politically incorrect Kunis, Jon?

    Revealing demonstration, though, over what passes for a touchy subject for some. “Criticize Communism? Why I never!”

  • Cecelia

    Rokker said:
    nly FOX could find five goofballs that make Glenn Beck look sane in comparison.

    Yeah, what are the dramatic Beria show trials or 20 million dead in Stalin’s genocide or ethnic deportation schemes when Hollywood has Fox News to worry about.

  • Cecelia

    Paleoconservatarian said:
    “Criticize Communism? Why I never!”

    Not when you can do another Nazi movie linking an evolved humanistic superman to anyone but French and German philosophers…

  • Paleoconservatarian

    writer said:
    The left seems to make a habit of watching shows they hate.

    But they’ve yet to explain or quantify the hate, what with it being on the schedule for only a week so far.

    Maybe they thought after Beck gave up his show Chris Matthews would suddenly receive 2 million viewers…

  • Nature Freak

    writer said:
    The left seems to make a habit of watching shows they hate.

    Cecelia said:
    “Finally someone says it the way it really is! You hear that, ladies? Don’t do what you want! Only us guys have the right parts for that kind of thing.”

    You guys absolutely do!

    You have to be the most disingenuous idiot in the world to claim there is no difference in sexual attitudes between men and women!

    How much of the difference is cultural conditioning?
    And even if it was proven some differences exist, this does not discount the fact that not everyone is an average. The average person is not at the mean or median. Trends do not count for an entire population.
    Here is an example: The average person is not gay, but Gays still exist. Always have, always will.
    Again, we are all unique sexual individuals.

    BTW, no one should be pressured into having sexual activity if they do not want it. People have the right to be celibate. I support choice. Sexual activity is not for everyone.

    Some people are naturally asexual. Some people are naturally polyamorus.

    Honesty with a partner is important. Betrayal is not cool.

  • Yukon Jack

    Not the end of the week, yet, but for a new show, I must say, they did pretty good:

    http://www.mediabistro.com/tvnewser/the-scoreboard-thursday-july-14_b76882#disqus_thread

  • Cecelia

    Nature Freak said:
    How much of the difference is cultural conditioning?
    And even if it was proven some differences exist, this does not discount the fact that not everyone is an average. The average person is not at the mean or median. Trends do not count for an entire population.
    Here is an example: The average person is not gay, but Gays still exist. Always have, always will.
    Again, we are all unique sexual individuals.

    Exceptions always exist. You tolerate (remember that’s a GOOD word) exceptions, you don’t institutionalize them.

    You’ve only to hear the difference in sex talk between adolescent boys and adolescent girls (even WITH birth control) to know that there is a distinct difference between the sexes.

  • Yukon Jack

    BFD said:
    Why isn’t this show called The View 2?

    It could be, because The View SHOULD be called “The Beauty and The Beasts”. And I don’t mean Goldberg, Behar, Walters or Sherry be The Beauty, for obvious reasons.

  • Paleoconservatarian

    Nature Freak said:
    There are men who can easily have casual sex, there are men (lots of actually) who emotionally can not.
    There are women who easily can have casual sex, there are women who emtionally can not.
    A majority of prostitutes/ sex workers are women. Interesting.
    Human beings are individuals. We are all unique. This is BS one size fits all pop psychology.
    Human sexuality is complicated and can not be reduced to trite statements such as the ones by Tantaros.

    Because prostitutes are perfect examples of well adjusted human beings by which we should judge normal human sexual behavior.

  • Paleoconservatarian

    Cecelia said:
    Exceptions always exist. You tolerate (remember that’s a GOOD word) exceptions, you don’t institutionalize them.

    You’ve only to hear the difference in sex talk between adolescent boys and adolescent girls (even WITH birth control) to know that there is a distinct difference between the sexes.

    I thought it was that you normalize the exception as unique, vibrant and diverse and demonize the norm as traditionalist and repressive.

    You haven’t been keeping up with your cultural conditioning.

  • Yoda002

    I think they already have a show like this, it’s called the View.

  • expatpatriot

    Cecelia said:
    “First off, the panel was very, very excited that Kunis takes a hard stand against Communism since, as Gutfeld explained, so many Hollywood types stupidly praise it (Gee, wouldn’t it be great if we made some kind of list, like a black list or whatever to round up these dirty Hollywood Reds?)”

    Nah… didn’t work. That’s why you see so many movies about the human drama of Stalin, Beria, and the travails USSR exiles like Solzhenitsyn and Sakharov.

    Who are they when you can do another McCarthy movie?

    Perhaps there’s some gulag for the politically incorrect Kunis, Jon?

    Interesting that we can still make jokes about a political philosophy that’s been bankrupt/irrelevant in the US for at least 50 years and in the rest of the world for 30 or so.

    Yes, I realize that there are still people who still call themselves Communists, Trotskyites, Maoists, etc., etc., but they don’t really matter much.

    Even the largest Communist party in the world — China’s — has almost nothing to do with Marxism-Leninism and everything to do with hanging onto the reins of power as the country reinvents itself as a money-coining machine for the well connected.

  • expatpatriot

    Cecelia said:
    Yeah, what are the dramatic Beria show trials or 20 million dead in Stalin’s genocide or ethnic deportation schemes when Hollywood has Fox News to worry about.

    I think you’re conflating two unrelated things here. The actress made a fairly humorous comment that also demonstrated some historical awareness and then Bershad used that as a jumping-off point to snark at the panel.

    I don’t think that has any particular relation to the grotesque crimes of soviet leaders who have, after all, been dead for 60 years or so.

  • Cecelia

    expatpatriot said:
    I don’t think that has any particular relation to the grotesque crimes of soviet leaders who have, after all, been dead for 60 years or so.

    No. I’m afraid Jon’s reference to Hollywood and McCarthy, made it utterly appropriate.

    The fact that these tyrants who killed over 20 million people have now been dead over 60 years and we still haven’t seen a movie about Stalin’s pogroms and the USSR “sewage disposal system” (the Gulag Archipelago) makes it that much more inexplicable!!!

  • Cecelia

    expatpatriot said:
    don’t think that has any particular relation to the grotesque crimes of soviet leaders who have, after all, been dead for 60 years or so.

    Tell THAT to the Czech Republic and Slovakia.

  • Paleoconservatarian

    Cecelia said:
    No. I’m afraid Jon’s reference to Hollywood and McCarthy, made it utterly appropriate.

    The fact that these tyrants who killed over 20 million people have now been dead over 60 years and we still haven’t seen a movie about Stalin’s pogroms and the USSR “sewage disposal system” (the Gulag Archipelago) makes it that much more inexplicable!!!

    We have been treated to Stalingrad, however, and soaring revolutionary music.

  • The Rock

    I like the five pretty good replace ment for Beck. I laughed a lot today seem like Bob didn’t like having to talk about Casey Anothony laughed that he was fake sleeping LOL.

  • expatpatriot

    Cecelia said:
    No. I’m afraid Jon’s reference to Hollywood and McCarthy, made it utterly appropriate.

    The fact that these tyrants who killed over 20 million people have now been dead over 60 years and we still haven’t seen a movie about Stalin’s pogroms and the USSR “sewage disposal system” (the Gulag Archipelago) makes it that much more inexplicable!!!

    A quick google of “movies about the Gulag” and “movies about Stalin’s purges” produces over a million (admittedly highly redundant) hits. And there’s always “Dr. Zhivago.”

    However, I don’t think you’re going to see any “popular” movies about the topics until someone with Spielbergian passion and skill takes up the subject. Too damn depressing.

  • expatpatriot

    Cecelia said:
    Tell THAT to the Czech Republic and Slovakia.

    I think the citizens of those countries would agree with me that the rather silly comments of “The 5″ don’t have any serious bearing on the subject. Not that the subject is unserious — just that “The 5″ are.

  • Anonymous

    Why doesn’t Faux News bring back it’s “The 1/2 Hour News Hour”?

    Oh that’s right it like Gutfeld it wasn’t funny either. 

  • Anonymous

    It’s not about parts, it’s about mindset.  To think otherwise is to know nothing about women…or to be in total denial about the truth about women.

  • Anonymous

    Why isn’t this show called The View 2?

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_EK6EPCVMIJHMK5RBREBMZNQMKI Michael

    This show is such complete shit. I would rather have Glenn Beck back and he was a crazy extreme right-wing conspiracy theorist, but at least he was funny.

  • Michael T.

    Up until now I was unaware that a talk show on a major television channel could possibly have a more inane conversation than on the CBS talkfest “The Talk”.

    Who seriously finds this rambling banter entertaining?

    Sadly there is not even enough substance there for Saturday Night Live to parody.

    Before someone thinks my critcism is blinded by some hatred of Fox News, that is not the case.

    In fact, Bill O’Reilly often has stimulating debates featuring three contributors (including BillO).

    To wit:
    O’Reilly-Colmes-Crowley
    O’Reilly-Hoover-Carlson
    O’Reilly-Wiehl-Guilfoyle

  • Anonymous

    “ You hear that, ladies? Don’t do what you want! Only us guys have the right parts for that kind of thing.”
    I don’t think that is what she’s saying. She’s saying that women almost always end up *emotionally attached* – even if they start out just as friends with benefits. I think there is a lot of truth in that. Women can say they just want a f*ck buddy – but more often than not, they want more, or end up wanting more.

  • Yukon Jack

    So, how did The Five fare in the first week?

    Behold:

    http://www.mediabistro.com/tvnewser/the-scoreboard-thursday-july-14_b76882#disqus_thread

    The only thing I would like to see is more balance. Pity old Bob Beckel, alone against four conservatives. Give him a break! Get another lib!!!!

  • Anonymous

    I can see only one possible outcome.  If men can have NSA sex and women cannot, then it is obvious that the Fox hosts think that guys should be having this NSA sex with each other.  Is Fox going pro-gay?  Or at least gay until marriage?

  • ATLAS

    I’ve tried to watch this show but can’t get passed 3 minutes.  Terrible, terrible.  Someone else said it here…it should be called The View 2.  Kuddos!

  • Anonymous

    Let me guess, the show is 4 neocons against 1 sell out liberal.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_SIYF5565LXG7BBKTKGSSFWU7TA The Rock

    Beck was over top couldn’tn’t be taken seriously and wasn’t funny at all. The five is better than hearing end of world crap that Beck say every show.

  • Maizie45

    The thing is, when a woman has an orgasm there’s a chemical released in her brain that creates a feeling of attachment.  If you’re having lots of crappy sex, no big whoop, but if you’re having good sex (either with a bunch of random dudes every night, or a regular f buddy), it could cause some negative side effects to your emotional well being.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_SIYF5565LXG7BBKTKGSSFWU7TA The Rock

    Your claim is a lie Bob Beckel isn’t a sellout liberal he is a bleeding hart liberal but I guess any liberla that works for Fox is a sellout which there not. You don’t know what your talking about and are far-left bomb thrower without any facts or proof that lies about Fox News.

  • Miljanamandich

    You are daydreaming.NewsCorp is not imploding,liberals’ heads are

  • http://twitter.com/sethmillstein Seth Millstein

    You get the distinct impression watching this that none of the roundtable participants have ever had a friend with benefits.

  • http://twitter.com/sethmillstein Seth Millstein

    You get the distinct impression watching this that none of the roundtable participants have ever had a friend with benefits.

  • Miljanamandich

    The Five and Red Eye are clever and funny. The shows laugh at liberal sanctimony without the horrible raunchiness seen all the time on liberal “comedy”shows such as Bill Maher’s. They are classy,which is why they’ll never be like The View.The former have 4 conservatives to one liberal,the latter has the opposite ratio.That explains the classiness of the former.

  • RecoveringTeabagger

    Remember this is Fox News!! It is run by former GOP operatives. You can’t expect too much fairness and balance.

  • Anonymous

    Take those same adolescents 20 years later and you’ll find that the differences you noticed in their immaturity have more or less disappeared (with exceptions, of course).

    But Nature Freak’s comment about cultural conditioning is a good one. The differences between men and women, sexually, is not the same from country to country or culture to culture. I live in Korea, and what Korean women will say publically about sex is a complete 180 from what they say and believe in private; publically, they “admit” to adhering to the cultural norms, but privately they are much more in tune with men than you would think.

  • Anonymous

    “the panel was very, very excited that Kunis takes a hard stand against
    Communism since, as Gutfeld explained, so many Hollywood types stupidly
    praise it”

    Uh, when was the last time a “Hollywood type” PRAISED Communism?!?

    “TANTAROS: How many women have called you up all night, stalking you, crying?”

    Too many.

  • http://profiles.google.com/mattgordonmd matt gordon

    All five of these dim bulbs together would not make a good night light.

  • http://profiles.google.com/mattgordonmd matt gordon

    Saint Nancy, the self-annointed martyr of justice.

  • http://twitter.com/LowOnProzac rdf

    “They also had one of the most uncomfortable television segments I’ve ever seen …”Uncomfortable for a thin-skinned “progressive” maybe. I agree with @Miljanamandich – the show is funny and clever.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_CQWUTBF2KSSVOXCR4PSN66L2PM James

    I like this show. The five and red eye are now the only show’s I watch on fox. this show is Morning Joe done right, Without peolpe with egos and talking down to you,

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Billy-Brantingham/8326080 Billy Brantingham

    Uh, Benicio Del Toro and his lame-ass propaganda flick about Che?  Michael Moore and his equally lame-ass “Sick-O” where he went to a tourist hospital that normal Cubans could never get into in a million years?  I mean, shit, dude.  I named those off the top of my head.  We’ve seen tons and tons of movies praising Communists and Communism in general…what was the last movie that was anti-Communist?  Red Dawn?

    You can hate on Fox News all you want, but at least have the decency to admit that for such a despicable and evil ideology, Communism has gotten off EXTREMELY light in popular culture – it’s worse than Fascism for crying out loud!  And then, when you consider all the movies about EBIL CORPORASHUNS!!! (oh noes! THEY’RE TRYING TO SELL ME THINGS!  MAKE THEM STOP!), it makes the whole Hollywood kid gloves treatment of Communism look even more fucked up.

  • Anonymous

    of course conservatives like greg gutfield

    they still pop their collars and seem like the type of douchebags who would wear ed hardy.

  • Guest

    It’s not surprising that Kunis doesn’t like Communism. She is from Ukraine. She probably remembers from her childhood how awful Communism is in practice.

  • Anonymous

    yes…. political philosophy that’s been bankrupt/irrelevant …. however Obama wants to take us there….. and almost half the people in this country want it despite its dismal failure globally…. insane. nce more tahn half want the free circus of nero we are sunk….. just look at the budget debates. the silution is obvious but libs/progressives/commies – call them waht you wish…. want more big givernment, defying reality. listen to pelosi. listen to reid… nothing they say makes logical sense.

  • Anonymous

    I don’t think that has any particular relation to the grotesque crimes of soviet leaders who have, after all, been dead for 60 years or so.     
    GIVE OBAMA TIME…. HE WONT DISAPPOINT
    REMEMBER HE IS BILL AYERS / REV WRIGHT / HITLER WANNA BE rolled into one empty suit…
    BILL AYERS SAID 25 MILLION AMERICANS WOULD HAVE TO BE KILLED TO ACHIEVE THE LIBERAL GOAL OF TOTALITARIANISM IN THE USA….
    OBAMA IS FOLLOWING THE OVERLAOD THE GOVERNMENT TECHNIQUE AND IF NOT STOPPED IT’S ALL OVER BUT THE SHOUTING AND BLOOD IN THE STREETS…

  • caconservative

    “Intelligent” debate!

  • LalaDoll

    Brilliant comment Nature Freak!
    Truth is, adolescent boys and girls really are not as different as you think. Girls maybe prim and proper in public, but trust me, our thoughts are all but godly…trust me I know…I’m a kid.
    But to echo what Nature Freak said, yes, there are many of men and women who can tolerate casual sex, many who can’t just like there are many that can tolerate relationships, and many that can’t. Tantaros is totally oblivous, as you can’t say what most men or most women do except in your experience only, I mean, does she KNOW most men and most women? No, I’d venture to say that more women like casual sex than people think at least.

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