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Dick Cheney Kept A Resignation Note In Expectation Of Debilitating Heart Attack

» 49 comments

As it turns out, we weren’t the only ones worrying that Dick Cheney was on the verge of suffering a debilitating heart attack while acting as vice president. Apparently, while in office, he kept a signed resignation letter locked away in a safe, secret to all but a few, for just in case. Having successfully survived two terms, and long enough after to throw together a 576 page memoir, he’s ready to admit: maybe he was a little afraid.

“The possibility that I might have a heart attack or a stroke that would be incapacitating… there is no mechanism for getting rid of a vice president who can’t function,” he told NBC in an interview that will be aired Monday, in coordination with the publication of his memoir, In My Time: A Personal and Political Memoir. The memoir, Cheney says in the same interview, will likely result in “heads exploding all over Washington.” That being the case, look out for seismic readings next week that are higher than yesterday’s record breaking earthquake.

(H/T Politico)

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  • Anonymous

    Dick Cheney is a great man and patriot with an outstanding family .

  • Celisary45

    Dick Cheney is a Racist Prick!!!!! Who along with George W. Bush belong in the Hague standing trial for War crimes….

  • Anonymous

    Mr. Five Deferment Cheney is the most anti-American person out there.

  • Michelle

    Ditto!

  • Michelle

    You’re a moron.  Nuff said.

  • Anonymous

    Clifford Elisary is a three time loser . A smalltime burglar , a pickpocket and dog thief who will go away for good on his next conviction . He smokes crack , but makes up for that by also staying drunk 24/7 , especially while driving . He smells like a skunk and looks like Charlie Rangel , if Charlie had been hit in the face with a shovel . But , other than that , he’s an insane , nasty little twerp of a creep  of a pile of garbage .

  • Jooce

    hmm too bad…

  • Anonymous

    right – standing behind Clinton.  

  • Anonymous

    right – standing behind Clinton.  

  • Anonymous

    right skippy.  Does someone pay you to post stupid posts or do you do it for free?

  • Anonymous

    “there is no mechanism for getting rid of a vice president who can’t function,”
    We know, watching Biden we now know the answer that he’s still there.

  • Anonymous

    Too bad the current Veep didn’t put one away in case he is mentally incapacitated, because it could probably already have been put to use.  

  • Anonymous

    Sorry, I didn’t see your post before I posted mine.  Similar sentiment.  

  • TXarc

    The country would have been well served if this vile warmonger had to put the letter in play.

  • Anonymous

    Joe Biden, National Embarrassment, SHOULD have a resignation letter ready.

    The only problem is that he couldn’t find the right crayons to make the note look pretty.

  • Anonymous

    Watching Biden make a complete fool of himself, I can only believe that if this crowd somehow steals the election next year we might as well surrender to China right now.

  • Wasser12

    Cheney is an evil monster who should have been hanged side-by-side with Saddam.

  • The TRUTH looks like THIS

    Cheney is a great American and I wish him well.

  • Ekcletric Cowboy

    Were YOU next on Cheney’s H2O list?

  • Anonymous

    i disagree with everything you said.

    he was not a great man, but a coward.
    his definition of “patriot” has cost many american lives.
    his spawn are horrid.

    when he passes, the Underworld will have a new Overlord.

  • DEFENDER-90

    My list of “anti-Americans”.not in any particular order.

    #1Jane Fonda
    #2Tom Hayden
    #3Lee Hurvey Oswald
    #4Benedict Arnold
    #5Liberal Democrats who volunteerd to be human shields for Saddam Hussein in 2003.

  • Anonymous

    Why is this news?  It would have been irresponsible of him not too have one sitting in the drawer just in case considering his health condition.

  • Anonymous

    Even Bush stopped listening to him at the end of his term, that’s how crazy he was becoming.  

  • Anonymous

    After the release of Cheney’s new book, I am eagerly awaiting his prediction that heads will explode in DC. It should get pretty interesting.
    I agree with your assessment of Cheney.

  • Anonymous

    I have one important category of anti-American I would like to add to your list.
    Any elected government official who goes behind the backs of and against the will of the American people to skirt the law with actions they unilaterally decide is “for our own good”.

  • Sheik Yerbouti

    Why is there never a debilitating heart attack when you really need one?

  • Sharpo

    defender90: why are you a coward with no balls?

  • Anonymous

    We were all hoping, Dick.

  • Anonymous

    Barack Obama Keeps A Resignation Note In Expectation Of Debilitating Teleprompter Malfunction

  • Anonymous

    Too bad Cheney is too old to run again.  Judging by the vile and unreasoned hatred in the comments I bet a Palin/Cheney Presidency would drive these trolls to wild.

  • expatpatriot

    Dang! We were *that* close to getting rid of the bastard.

  • Adam Baum

    Your former countrymen still really dislike you.

    Please keep the “expat” until forever.

  • expatpatriot

    Speak for yourself, Jocko. My sentiment is very popular around the world — including inside the US.

  • expatpatriot

    After the laughing and the dancing in the streets, we’d need to take a nap. But we’d be fully awake in November 2012.

  • expatpatriot

    There’s still a chance that he, Rummy, and the C’boy could find themselves in chains in front of the tribunal in the Hague. I hear Mladic’s keeping a bunk warm.

  • expatpatriot

    And I understand that Eva Braun made a mean potato latke.

  • expatpatriot

    That’s a pretty vivid little fantasy you’ve got there. Did you have to change your Depend, ya know . . . after?

  • http://twitter.com/Good_Lt Good Lt.

    I’m sorry – your Race Card Express has been denied due to an account overdraw.

    Please insert another card and try again.

  • http://twitter.com/Good_Lt Good Lt.

    Yeah – and you consider Bush’s end of term to be the worst ever. Maybe Bush should have listened to him instead of his newly-minted Democrat Congress.

    Food for thought.

  • http://twitter.com/Good_Lt Good Lt.

    Yes.  Let your hate flow.

    Your hate is making you powerful.

  • http://twitter.com/Good_Lt Good Lt.

    Death wishes for political opponents? Check.

    You’re giving us a lesson in why liberals are not to be trusted with power.

  • http://twitter.com/Good_Lt Good Lt.

    And that popularity makes it right.

    Slavery was popular at one point, and that made it right.

    QED

  • Anonymous

    Wished he’d tendered it to the President. He would have done us all a favor. 

  • Sheik Yerbouti

    You mean like throwing them out of an airplane as your tea-party pal did recently?  And what don’t you understand about the word “debilitating” butter bar?

  • AliveStillKickin

     Cheney has balls…..Something your boy, Obeelzebub should grow.
    That would be a sight…..a liberal with courage…..ROFLMAO!!

  • AliveStillKickin

    I am still waiting to hear that AF-1 has crashed….no survivors….so I feel your pain

  • Anonymous

    Cheney is not and will never be a great man.  He, Rummy and Bush could be taken into custody depending on what Nation they visited. 

    Just because you think that a man so fearful (1% doctorine, anyone) is great means nothing. His/Bush Administration dropped the credibility of our Nation in our own eyes as well as the rest of the World. 

    And, whether you like it or not, we kind of share this planet with other nations. 

  • expatpatriot

    And what grade did you get in those logic classes where you clearly failed to learn the difference between a proof (QED) and a correlation?

  • Joe

    Dick Cheney..Evil incarnate

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