Celebrities Staged Dramatic Reading of Mueller Report Because Of Course They Did


The Mueller report is a long and grueling read, by some accounts. But never let it be said that boring material and pointless performance stops celebrities who know better than us about everything. Which is why a lot of actors- like seriously, a lot — gathered together on Monday night at the behest and on the dime of Law Works Action to stage a dramatic reading of that report.

The performance is titled “The Investigation: A Search for the Truth in Ten Acts”, and is listed as just #TheInvestigation on their website, because hashtags you guys! It stars Annette Bening, Kevin Kline, John Lithgow, Jason Alexander, Alyssa Milano, Alfre Woodard, Zachary Quinto and several others (even the “I’m a Mac” kid!) reading the Mueller report.

Reading. The Mueller. Report.

That clip above is from the actual performance. Sorry. It was big news, though, and got a lot of free promotion from excited Frankenstein people like John Kerry, who called it “an act of public service,” and Dave Jolly, who gave thanks.

They also put out this clip where a bunch of those celebrities take turns saying parts of a sentence, and then those parts are stitched together. In the biz, this now well-worn format is known as “snobdescension”, or should be, and is considered by the people who are in it to be “impactful” and compelling.

These weren’t the only celebrities getting on the taking turns talking bandwagon though. Rob Reiner directed a similar video for viral content Twitter news site Now This, and it featured famous actors Robert De Niro and Some Guy With a Crazy Mustache.

The group behind Monday’s big performance, Law Works, is being billed at places like CBS as “an organization dedicated to defending the nonpartisan role of the Department of Justice.” CBS doesn’t say who organized it or where the funding comes from, or what the money is used for besides celebrity performances. USA Today refers to Law Works as “an advocacy group.” Fox News called them a “sponsor” and “website.”

On the Law Works “About Us” page, it says the organization or group or whatever it is “engages bipartisan voices and educates the public” and that they “partners with leaders in the legal, judicial, national security, law enforcement community, and current and former elected and appointed officials.” Is Dave Jolly one of them? John Kerry? Alyssa Milano? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Bipartisan is a flexible word, so it could be true here, but they accept donations and those are handled by ActBlue Charities, a “pass-through organization, and service for donations to left-of-center nonprofits and PACs.”

There is some double talk out there about how it’s a public service in the interest of informing the public. But don’t mistake what the point is. George didn’t.

The performance seemed lively, and if you’re lucky enough to see John Lithgow live, more power to you.

But is it weird? Yes. This is weird. And snotty, and snobby, and condescending. You’re dumb, they’re smart, and this is them trying to make sure you know it.

It’s just another example of “ya just don’t get it, do ya” from elite members of the cultural upper crust. But hey, maybe they’ll raise a ton of money. We’re sure it probably doesn’t go directly to Democrat campaigns maybe.

This is an opinion piece. The views expressed in this article are those of just the author.

Filed Under: