After doing some segments this afternoon about how the electric car is the devil and such, The Five took a look at how the Republican nomination race is going. Greg Gutfeld started things off by making an impassioned plea for Mitt Romney to start getting more angry. The conversation then turned to someone who has no problem getting angry; Newt Gingrich. How angry? How about “murder every single person at the prom in a hellish blaze” angry.
That image came from one of Gutfeld’s least tortured metaphors, one that everyone seemed eager to jump on:
GUTFELD: The thing is, how is Newt gonna take defeat? He’s gonna be like Carrie at the prom. He’s gonna make it bad for everybody, right?
DANA PERINO: Right. He’s gonna be like, ‘Wait a minute. I was the one. I’ve been waiting for this moment. There I am in front of the stage and the Republican Party is pouring blood on my head so, you know what, I’m gonna burn everybody’s house down.’
GUTFELD: That was a great tortured metaphor!
BOB BECKEL: He’s gonna call a huge press conference, lock all the doors, and then blood comes pouring down, get out the only door that’s open, and burn the thing!”
Wow. From now on, whenever I see Newt Gingrich, I’m going to be unable to not imagine the voices in his head. “They’re all gonna laugh at you!” “We’re very sorry, Newt.” “They’re all gonna laugh at you!” “We’re very sorry, Newt!” “They’re all gonna laugh at you!”
Seriously, all I can say is that, come convention time, GOP folk better keep a close eye out for ropes leading to buckets on the top of the stage. Either that or have an escape plan.
Watch the clip from Fox News below:
Have a tip we should know? email@example.com