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Colbert Super PAC Airing ‘Mitt the Ripper’ Ad In South Carolina Narrated By John Lithgow

» 113 comments

It’s been less than four days since Colbert Super PAC changed hands from comedian Stephen Colbert to his colleague Jon Stewart and was renamed the Definitely Not Coordinating With Stephen Colbert Super PAC. Political analysts were wondering how long it would take for the new PAC to start airing ads in South Carolina. Well, wonder no more, because a new ad from the PAC targets Mitt Romney over his “corporations are people” comment.

RELATED: Stephen Colbert Salutes Romney’s Position On Corporate Personhood: ‘Dr. Martin Luther, Inc.’

The new ad, courtesy of Americans For A Better Tomorrow, Tomorrow, is titled “Attack In B Minor For Strings.” It was released online late last night, along with a press release by Stewart, the Super PAC’s “President For Life For Now.”

“Mitt Romney claims to be pro-corporations,” said Jon Stewart, President of The Definitely Not Coordinated With Stephen Colbert Super PAC. “But would you let him date your daughter’s corporation? Americans have been clamoring for a comprehensive study of this crucial issue, so we splurged for the full sixty-second commercial. We think South Carolinians will agree – they deserve a leader who shares their state’s values, and perhaps even their state’s initials.”

The new spot begins airing today in a major ad buy that will blanket South Carolina from Charleston all the way to North Charleston.

The ad is narrated by actor John Lithgow, proudly labeling corporations as “America’s greatest institution.” But as both Mitt Romney and the Citizens United Supreme Court ruling have declared, corporations are legally people and have the same rights. And yet, as the ad claims, when Romney was in charge of Bain Capital, he split up companies and “got rid of what he couldn’t use.”

RELATED: Stephen Colbert Is Now Offering $500K To Sponsor South Carolina’s GOP Primary (With A Few Conditions)

But if corporations are people, and Mitt Romney carved up corporations while at Bain, then by the candidate’s own logic, the ad declares, he is a “serial killer.” The ad encourages South Carolinians to vote for anyone except “Mitt the Ripper.”

Watch the ad below, courtesy of Comedy Central:

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  • Anonymous

    HA!

  • Jonathan Cantor

    This is awesome.

  • Anonymous

    I would have hoped for a better, more sharply satiric spot. Nonetheless, Colbert’s efforts to take on the Super PACs has been a real tour-de-force and he deserves a Pulitzer. He and his writers have done more to draw attention to the farce of campaign finance than any journalist or advocacy group in the country.

  • Anonymous

    Give the writers a raise!

  • AMP2020

    F-Comedy Central video player

  • Anonymous

    “Colbert’s efforts to take on the Super PACs has been a real tour-de-force and he deserves a Pulitzer.”

    Yes, the efforts by the guy who is paid millions of dollars a year by a fortune 100 corporation to advance a political agenda by writing, producing and hosting a nightly 1/2-hour talk show deserves a “Pulitzer Prize” for satirizing corporations (and individuals) who are guilty of advancing their own political agenda.

    I’m guessing you don’t see the irony in your own statement; most liberals don’t.

  • http://neurobonkers.com Neurobonkers

    Can someone youtube this for international viewers?

  • david r

    Politics needs more of this! Hilarious! I hope we get some of this stuff down the stretch, instead of the non-stop Obama drone on the tube.

  • david r

     Don’t worry about them.  They are already on youtube.

  • http://twitter.com/WorldDivider Mark Prior

    Don’t worry Colbert Obama will be lying about Romney’s record as well.

  • Anonymous

    Ironically, you don’t see the irony in yours.

    Colbert never hides the fact that he’s an overpaid corporate shill. If you ever actually watched his show you’d know that he revels in it, which is why he’d be the perfect GOP nominee. There’s nothing today’s Republicans love more than a soulless mouthpiece for unrestrained capitalism tarted up as “free enterprise.”

  • Anonymous

    You seem to be a really fun guy ….”harumph harumph ‘liberals’ harumph…”

  • Anonymous

    “Colbert never hides the fact that he’s an overpaid corporate shill.”

    I have no idea if that’s true, nor do I care.  What is indisputable is that he’s not advocating that constraints on his own personal free speech be implemented, or the rights of his CORPORATE employer be constrained, correct?  He’s not suggesting that the FEC tell Comedy Central what they can say or when they can say it or how much they can spend while saying it, are they?

    And yet, this is EXACTLY what’s he suggesting – through the comedic medium of sarcasm – should happen to and for everyone else:  The FEC should disallow other corporations or other people from speaking out about issues or candidates that they feel strongly about.

    In Colbert’s world, only entertainers and “news” people would enjoy unrestricted First Amendment rights and the FEC would have the authority to limit everyone else’s, particularly during the height of campaign season.

    It’s absurd.

  • Anonymous

    Brilliant, but may be too smart for South Carolina

  • Anonymous

    This is made more amusing by the fact that John Lithgow himself played a serial killer in season 4 of Dexter! 

  • AMP2020

    Want to provide a link? I’ve been digging for a while and cant find a single link that points to something other than that garbage comedy central player

  • http://gregingleright.weebly.com/ Greg

    To amend Plautus Asinaria, “Willard is wolf to man”.

  • Anonymous

    Its one of the smarter PR stunts I’ve seen in awhile.

  • Anonymous

    spending money is not freedom of speech. if that’s true than you’re suggesting that some people have more freedom of speech than others which is complete garbage. 

  • Larry Linn

    Stephen Colbert is a comedian. The other Republican candidates are bad jokes!

  • Anonymous

    It’s appropriate that a comedian continues to dupe brainless liberals as they were duped into voting in the last presidential election for PT Barnum.

  • http://neurobonkers.com Neurobonkers

    yup me neither, all CC vids are blocked outside the U.S.

  • http://twitter.com/AdamMVillarreal Adam M Villarreal

    You brainless c*nt. You are seriously insinuating that because Colbert’s show is aired on a channel owned by a corporation, he is no different than a PAC?? You think somebody from Viacom is in his writer meetings directing him to espouse a directed political view? Does Viacom have a political viewpoint? Can it? It is tens of thousands of people.

    You say “corporations and other people,” as though there is no distinction. If you wouldn’t have majored in blowing frat boys then crying and praying for forgiveness throughout college, you’d know your flawed logic is dead out of the gate. There are only 5 media corporations left, which means nobody on television or radio or in a movie would ever be allowed to have a political view; or each one would be considered a PAC. Either one is absurd.

    Finally,if you can’t differentiate between political satire and political campaigns, you should have assassinated the Muppets when they were doing it 40 years ago. Pathetic, illogical scumbag.

  • Anonymous

    Colbert is correct. 

    The only legitimate way to address the Republicans is by mocking them.

  • Anonymous

    This goes so far beyond comedy. What Colbert and Stewart are doing is pure genius, and their timing is perfect. Pointing out the folly of Citizens United at a time when the decision is coming back to bite the Republicans in the goolies — well, I am just in awe.

  • Anonymous

    He is not duping liberals. This whole circus relates to the GOP primaries.

  • WiddleBabyDanielson

    It’s appropriate that you see it in such a partisan way.

  • Anonymous

    Other than the first sentence, I agree with your point entirely.

  • WiddleBabyDanielson

    I’m guessing you don’t see the irony in Newt complaining when it comes after him.

    You are SADLY remaining partisan while he points out the ABSURDITY of our election process.

  • WiddleBabyDanielson

    Adam.

    Your post has several good points.

    If you do not want it removed by the Mediate Police, I suggest you remove the first sentence.

  • Anonymous

    Colbert and Liebowitz have made tens of millions of dollars off of suckers like you and if you can’t see it I don’t know what I could say to you except no wonder why you voted for PT Barnum.

  • WiddleBabyDanielson

    I never watched him much until he started his super pac.
    He has done well highlighting the absurdities with lavish spending and the likes.
    And has a Lawyer come on to compare what hes is doing “legally” to the likes of Rove.

    http://www.colbertsuperpac.com/

  • WiddleBabyDanielson
  • WiddleBabyDanielson

    Who is Liebowitz?

  • http://neurobonkers.com Neurobonkers

    Yup, no joy :-(

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Mark-Carter/100000676937901 Mark Carter

    This is terrible.  I’m sorry, corporations are not people!  They are more than people.  A corporation provides the livelihood for thousands of people.  Capitalism is the heart and soul of America.  Corporations should have rights – definitely more than the lazy liberals who collect food stamps and whine about more handouts or freebies.  The best thing that is happening for this country is the rise of political power for corporations.  America will be much better off than a bunch of illegals and ghetto dwellers running the country.

  • Anonymous

    The sum total of his comedy IS that irony – I think you missed the point.

  • Anonymous

    Best season of Dexter too…

  • Anonymous

    Funny you are making funny of others being duped.. Maybe you should watch the video and re-evaluate..

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_T4XWQIA67RCLK4PP7WAI6QNTG4 Peggy G

    I’m a Romney supporter and I thought it was funny.  John Lithgow is always great!

  • WiddleBabyDanielson

    Cool stuff on the Astroturfing.
    Looks like I have some reading to do.

  • Anonymous

    Unfortunately, US history shows that you are absolutely correct.  When the corporations are in charge, you have to import temp workers to meet the need.  First, it was the slaves from Africa, then the poor shanghai’d from Europe, now the “illegal” immigrants from Mexico.  Anything to reduce the cost of labor and increase profits.  Then, as has consistently been done in the past, you muster the full force of the government, military and judicial, against anyone who objects to the increasing divide between the ‘haves’ and the ‘have nots’ or the rush for short term profits while destroying the environment.  Remember – Those who ignore history are destined to repeat it.

  • Anonymous

    Comics used to make a name for themselves by speaking truth to power.  Now they are the attack dogs defending power.  Carlin and Bruce would be so very proud of what today’s comics have become. 

  • Bobby Brady

    How great, an Obama ad by Comedy Central, as if Obama can’t afford to make his own. Jon Stewart is now stepping on Bill Burton’s toes.

  • Anonymous

    Colbert will always rile the nut cases. You can always tell them by the way they use “liberal” as an epithet rather than use the English language meaning of it. Then they see anyone disagreeing with them as communists, a word they probably couldn’t define either without googling it.

    Rational people, even a Romney supporter, as evidenced above, see the humor in Colbert’s “ad.” I wonder if Roberts and Alito have yet seen any reason to ponder the effects of what they have wrought? Naahh, probably not. They were installed for this purpose, and they take actions like Colbert’s in stride as collateral damage.

  • Anonymous

    I was also wondering how many people might take this seriously. As much as some of us follow this kind of stuff, there are many, many more who only have a vague idea who Colbert is or realize he’s not being serious. I can imagine some older voters in particular being perplexed by this. 

  • Anonymous

    Nice one. Before it is over, and Colbert is showing why, the conservatives will be demanding that Citizen’s United be reversed.

  • Anonymous

    I think the ad, and colbert’s superpac, are engaging in obvious satire. The system that permits the superpac is the target.

  • Bobby Brady

    And yet for some reason they went after a Republican candidate, even though Obama’s Super Pac, run by his former administration employee Bill Burton, has been running negative ads against Romney.
    Obama and his duplicity must be a satire free zone.

  • michael

    I p eed on stepehns dead corpse!

  • Anonymous

    If you think that capitalism is the “heart and soul of America”, then it is understandable why you believe that running a country like a business is a good idea.

    Let me suggest that the first new company that we create under our new “US Government, Incorporated”, right after we amend the Constitution to include the new title of “CEO” to go along with President, would be an oil production company. What kind of a dumb idea has it been to sell our nation’s prime oil holdings to Exxon, and companies, at way way low prices, thereby giving giant windfall profits to those companies, instead of setting up our own company that directly benefits our country? Every savvy business man knows that cutting out the middle man is how you increase profits. Why should we be forced to buy our oil on the world market, instead of filling our reserve tanks directly from our own production. And there are lots of unemployed oil men who would love a Federal job.

  • Anonymous

    You inadvertently placed an asterisk and forgot the apostrophe in “can’t.”

  • Anonymous

    Sure, they both make big money, but not O’Reilly money, not Rush money, and not even Beck money. I am sure none of those guys ever try to fool anyone. I get comedy central on my cable, I suppose it costs me a buck or two a month. I am happy to pay that to get hours of good entertainment. Stewart and Colbert’s stuff is just a bonus.

    My friend, chill, all of this is going to be getting worse, but it will turn out alright. Don’t worry.

  • Anonymous

    That is because it is the conservatives that support the superpac notion, who created it to exploit Citizen’s United, which they support. As I said, Colbert is trying to make a mockery out of the superpac/citizen’s united loophole. In fact Colbert, as does most progessives, does not favor the loophole. Why would he go after Obama who likewise does not like Citizen’s United? Sure, there are Obama superpacs, I suppose, but that is the game the US Supreme Court unleashed.

  • Anonymous

    Stewart and Colbert are ‘celebrity’ comedians. Anyone else longing for the good old days when comedy was funny and political humor was humorous?

  • Anonymous

    This is’nt about just Republicans. They will take their shot at Democrats when the timing(it’s all about timing) is right. It’s about the corruption of our political system by unlimited cash. We need fundamental reform of campaign financing at federal and state levels.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jay-Burken/1183500214 Jay Burken

    Wow.  You totally don’t get it at ALL.  Sad that you cannot understand humor and comedy.  Obviously since you are not a viewer of his show you don’t get it.  Anyone that does watch his show is peeing in their pants right now, because this is absolutely hilarious.  From John Lithgow narrating, to McDonalds in the hospital infancy room, to the title “Attack in B Minor For Strings” it’s all just TOO perfect and so elaborate.  Bravo!

  • http://twitter.com/TommyBennett Tom Bennett

    Damn, people like you are just so hilariously out of it. You must be living in a cave. You hard right conservatives don’t have a self-effacing sense of the absurd in your ridiculous bones. Get comedy central to produce and air a conservative-agenda comedy show. It doesn’t exist. You people are pathetically unfunny. 

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jay-Burken/1183500214 Jay Burken

    What in that was a lie (besides the term serial killer)?  Mitt Romney effectively killed some corporations while he was at Bain (and yes he did save some as well) and he also says corporations are people.  So, following his own logic, he has killed thousands of people.  It’s an interesting bit of reasoning and it’s a smart attack on Romney’s claim that corporations are people.  Especially the family watching their babies (McDonalds) at the hospital.  I mean that is just stark visual contrast to Romney’s viewpoints.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jay-Burken/1183500214 Jay Burken

    Wow.  I have never asked for food stamps, never gotten any kind of government welfare, never lived in a ghetto, and am not an illegal alien, and I know I am not the only “liberal” that is the same.  So your comments are incredibly over-generalized and ignorant.

    And by the way, fascism is a right-wing philosophy.  True liberals are not fascists at all lol.  BUT most of the republican candidates (including Romney) lean toward fascism and authoritarianism.  The only one that doesn’t is Ron Paul, who is a staunch libertarian.  That is the OPPOSITE of fascism.  So if you don’t want fascism (intrusive, totalitarian CONSERVATIVE government) you should vote for Ron Paul. 

    I mean really…. get educated before you make ridiculous comments.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jay-Burken/1183500214 Jay Burken

    This is not a pro-Obama ad at all.  You obviously do not see the point.  Valkyrie is absolutely right.  This is anti-SuperPAC, anti-Romney, and anti-”Corporations-are-people-my-friend”.  At the end it said vote Romney, or anti-Romney.  Not vote Romney or Obama.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jay-Burken/1183500214 Jay Burken

    They went after a republican candidate because he said corporations are people.  Colbert was just pointing out that logic is ridiculous.  The intellectual conclusion one gets from the ad is not that Romney is a serial killer, it is exactly the opposite.  He is NOT a serial killer because corporations are not people.

    This is simple satire (which obviously is not simple enough for you).  I mean this isn’t Voltaire or Locke or anything.  If it’s too over your head I suggest you brush up on your education.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jay-Burken/1183500214 Jay Burken

    I cackled numerous times when watching this video.  If you don’t think it’s funny you obviously don’t understand satire.  That is the comedy of the “good old days”.

  • Graeme Edgeler

    He might go after Obama, because even though they are both opposed to Super PACs, Obama still uses one.

  • AMP2020
  • AMP2020
  • Чёрт Возьми

    Remember the basic rule: Candidates cannot use superpacs!
    They must not coordinate with them in any way, therefore they cannot be using them.

  • Чёрт Возьми

    Yes. Carlin and Bruce would be proud!
    You, sir, are simply intimidated and angry.

  • Чёрт Возьми

    Is this some kind of hyperbolic satire?

  • http://neurobonkers.com Neurobonkers

    Star!

  • http://neurobonkers.com Neurobonkers

    Cheers :-) Pretty relevant to the whole Superpac thing as well!

  • Anonymous

    I’m not in the least bit worried my friend.  I just feel sorry for the sad and hopeless people that they are suckering.

  • Чёрт Возьми

    If you had watched the Colbert Report, you would find that every word exGOPman says is true. Colbert does know exactly what he is doing, and he has a lawyer on the show to prove it!

    He shows exactly how much a superpac can get away with, and he does incorporate being a “corporate shill” into his show almost every night!

    He and his lawyer did specifically spell out exactly what his corporate employer could and could not say and do, and how Colbert Superpac could get around it. Colbert has shown us how this works in the real world, step by step.

    You would have learned a lot from him, but that is not what you want to do, is it?

  • Anonymous

    Not finding ALL satire funny is not understanding satire? Colbert is lame and counting on you not to notice.

  • david r

    I had a friend in London for years.  He had access.  Let me ask him.

  • Anonymous

    What a shocker that most Cons don´t get the brilliance of Colbert´s demonstration of the satire the political system has become.

  • Anonymous

    Nonsense.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_7UBIOOXN4NTXIESYV42GZ4LAVU Lee Murphy

    Apparently Rick Perry is following Colbert’s lead. According to a report in the Daily Rash Perry told Maury Povich that Mitt Romney once beat an elderly woman with his polo mallet. http://www.thedailyrash.com/rick-perry-says-mitt-romney-beat-elderly-woman-with-a-polo-mallet

  • Just some Blow Hard…

    Yes I am sure that Carlin and Bruce would be completely for corporations buying political power…

    http://youtu.be/acLW1vFO-2Q

  • Larry Linn

    Stephen
    Colbert is a comedian, and the other Republican candidates are bad jokes. Pat
    Paulsen and Andy Kaufman tore down the gates, opened the door, and Colbert has
    charged through the portal!

  • Anonymous

    Bill Moyers explores how America’s vast inequality didn’t just happen, it’s been politically engineered.
    http://www.commondreams.org/video/2012/01/14

  • bob ross

    I would like to point out that Steven Colbert’s PAC stole my Mitt Romany serial killer idea over night! He’s just another Politician taking advantage of the working man! My Lawyers will be in touch and I have Lawyers I haven’t even used yet! Besides that Jack The Ripper isn’t even an American You Communist SOB!
    “If Corporations are people my friend then Mitt Romany is the Ted Bundy of the financial sector…Giving unsuspecting Companies and Workers a ride then leaving there dead bodies in roadside ditches…No wounder Republicans are nervous…The American People are closing in on this Wallstreeter.”
    EditReply11 hours ago
    Hope you got about 250 million dollars! But I’ll settle for 50 million…and a monkey!

  • WiddleBabyDanielson
  • Чёрт Возьми

    Great ad. Great fun.

    Just playing with the idea, I think it would be appropriate to refer to the act as cannibalism. Bain Capital, a person, grew by dismembering and eating other persons. That was the worst of its acts. In other cases, it dealt in “mere” slavery, buying up people, making them more athletic (slimmer) or fatter, and then selling them off to other people.

  • Bobby Brady

    Obama, as we saw during the last election with his “stance (lol)” on public financing, is for whatever is good for Obama…and so is Comedy Central, Jon Stewart and Colbert.

  • Anonymous

    So corporations really are people?

  • Anonymous

    In fact Colbert is doing you, and the Republican party a favor. Why don’t you ask yourself why such a parody resonates (not only among the left) ?

  • Anonymous

    “I have no idea if that’s true, nor do I care.”

    Sure is easy to make points when you don’t let things like research get in your way.

  • Anonymous
  • Anonymous

    Uh…I think you got duped …

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Vivlian-Wozz/100003324676254 Vivlian Wozz

    I am a 27 years old doctor,mature and beautiful. and now i am seeking a good man who can give me real love, so i got a sername Andromeda2002 on  Agedate.СòM, a nice and free place for younger women and older men,or older women and younger men, to interact with each other.Maybe you wanna check out or tell your friends.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Vivlian-Wozz/100003324676254 Vivlian Wozz

    I am a 27 years old doctor,mature and beautiful. and now i am seeking a good man who can give me real love, so i got a sername Andromeda2002 on  Agedate.СòM, a nice and free place for younger women and older men,or older women and younger men, to interact with each other.Maybe you wanna check out or tell your friends.
     

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_IOJMG4TDUKBYALMF6V43KPYSKA Kim

    My best Frie’nd ,She just has announced her Wedding with a RICH young man Ronald who is the CEO of a MNC ! They met via Rich,——-S.u.c.c.e.s.s.f.u.l.m.i.n.g.l.e . ℃ ⊙ M— is The Largest and Best club for Wealthy people and their admirers to chat online. …you don’t have to be rich there ,but you may meet One ,maybe you wanna check it out or tell your friends !
    He is so freaken amazing looking- geez louise!!!!!!!!!!!!! Gosh I’m gushing-lol

  • Anonymous

    Not to mention the fact that Bain was BUYING corporations!!! If they’re people, then that’s SLAVERY my friend!

  • Anonymous

    “He dun goofed” you mean

  • Anonymous

    “I have no idea if that’s true, nor do I care.”

    In other words, the facts are irrelevant to your position.

    Quit wasting your time “saying” or “writing” things … the most eloquent use of language is meaningless coming from a lazy mind.

    PS – Rhymes with “absurd.”

  • Anonymous

    He’s correct: corporations are demi-gods.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_UZEYM7GOD4ANTXVRCI57J5JQYI David

    I guess English is not your primary language, idiot.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_QIS7XSXQS2XU6SHJLPQT5WEYQM Philbur

    You just went full retarded son.

  • Charles Ulysses Feney

    The Bain Of America’s Existence
    (sung to “If I only had a brain”)

    First we buy ‘em, then we fire ‘em
    Then we offer to rehire ‘em,
    At wage that causes pain…
    Then we load out the machinery
    Sellin’ it for China greenery
    That’s they way we work at Bain.

    Then we cut employee hours
    Until the venture sours.
    Another business down the drain.
    Next we raid all the pensions
    And sell the patented inventions
    Just another day at Bain!

    Oh, I would tell you why
    The jobs have all been sent offshore
    I’d think of ways to even send them more
    And then I’d close… the corner store

    Yes, I wont be just a raider
    But a Limbaugh certified Free Trader
    Showin’ Obama my disdain.
    But I’ll get a beratin’
    When he and I start debatin’
    Because I can not run from Bain!

    ‘Cause I’m just an asset stripper,
    A Corporate Jack the Ripper
    In magic Mormon underwear
    America had best watch her back
    She’s my next victim to attack
    If I win, She hasen’t got a prayer!
    __________________________
    Charles Ulysses Feney

  • Charles Ulysses Feney

    The Bain Of America’s Existence
    (sung to “If I only had a brain”)

    First we buy ‘em, then we fire ‘em
    Then we offer to rehire ‘em,
    At wage that causes pain…
    Then we load out the machinery
    Sellin’ it for China greenery
    That’s they way we work at Bain.

    Then we cut employee hours
    Until the venture sours.
    Another business down the drain.
    Next we raid all the pensions
    And sell the patented inventions
    Just another day at Bain!

    Oh, I would tell you why
    The jobs have all been sent offshore
    I’d think of ways to even send them more
    And then I’d close… the corner store

    Yes, I wont be just a raider
    But a Limbaugh certified Free Trader
    Showin’ Obama my disdain.
    But I’ll get a beratin’
    When he and I start debatin’
    Because I can not run from Bain!

    ‘Cause I’m just an asset stripper,
    A Corporate Jack the Ripper
    In magic Mormon underwear
    America had best watch her back
    She’s my next victim to attack
    If I win, She hasen’t got a prayer!
    __________________________
    Charles Ulysses Feney

  • Charles Ulysses Feney

    The Bain Of America’s Existence
    (sung to “If I only had a brain”)

    First we buy ‘em, then we fire ‘em
    Then we offer to rehire ‘em,
    At wage that causes pain…
    Then we load out the machinery
    Sellin’ it for China greenery
    That’s they way we work at Bain.

    Then we cut employee hours
    Until the venture sours.
    Another business down the drain.
    Next we raid all the pensions
    And sell the patented inventions
    Just another day at Bain!

    Oh, I would tell you why
    The jobs have all been sent offshore
    I’d think of ways to even send them more
    And then I’d close… the corner store

    Yes, I wont be just a raider
    But a Limbaugh certified Free Trader
    Showin’ Obama my disdain.
    But I’ll get a beratin’
    When he and I start debatin’
    Because I can not run from Bain!

    ‘Cause I’m just an asset stripper,
    A Corporate Jack the Ripper
    In magic Mormon underwear
    America had best watch her back
    She’s my next victim to attack
    If I win, She hasn’t got a prayer!
    __________________________
    Charles Ulysses Feney

  • Charles Ulysses Feney

    The Bain Of America’s Existence

    (sung to “If I only had a brain”)

    First we buy ‘em, then we fire ‘em

    Then we offer to rehire ‘em,

    At wage that causes pain…

    Then we load out the machinery

    Sellin’ it for China greenery

    That’s they way we work at Bain.

    Then we cut employee hours

    Until the venture sours.

    Another business down the drain.

    Next we raid all the pensions

    And sell the patented inventions

    Just another day at Bain!

    Oh, I would tell you why

    The jobs have all been sent offshore

    I’d think of ways to even send them more

    And then I’d close… the corner store

    Yes, I wont be just a raider

    But a Limbaugh certified Free Trader

    Showin’ Obama my disdain.

    But I’ll get a beratin’

    When he and I start debatin’

    Because I can not run from Bain!

    ‘Cause I’m just an asset stripper,

    A Corporate Jack the Ripper

    In magic Mormon underwear

    America had best watch her back

    She’s my next victim to attack

    If I win, She hasn’t got a prayer!

    __________________________

    Charles Ulysses Feney

  • 12voltman1

    Very funny.

  • Anonymous

    Well played.

  • Чёрт Возьми

    According to the Republicans, they are.

  • Чёрт Возьми

    One does not “understand” satire if one does not know what is being skewered by the satire.
    Many years ago, a friend gave me a book that was a satire on Lord of the Rings. I had not read the original, and therefore the satire just wasn’t funny.
    Since RIChris doesn’t get it, we must assume that he is totally ignorant on the subject of the satire.

  • Anonymous

    Hey Mediaite, get it straight. It is no longer the Colbert Super PAC. He signed it over to Jon Stewart to make sure there was absolutely no coordination with him as a candidate. It’s now the “Not in any way remotely coordinated with Stephen Colbert , Super PAC, right. Completely different.

  • Anonymous

    Tell Limbaugh and Fox news I said Hi.

  • Anonymous

    He mistakenly thinks that’s Jon Stewart’s real name and for some reason conservatives like to repeat it a if it means something.

  • Anonymous

    Taking on the issue of SuperPACs and thier influnce on our democracy is not a partisan issue.

  • Anonymous

    “Yes, the efforts by the guy who is paid millions of dollars a year by a fortune 100 corporation to advance a political agenda ”

    Doesn’t that pretty much cover every Fox personality?

    Ya see, Colbert is on Comedy central and is paid to make people laugh and happens to be good at it. He doesn’t fasly claim to be a legitimate news network that is fair and balanced.

  • Anonymous

    BTW; Here’s a decent retrospective on Colbert’s take on the absurdity of PACs and SuperPACS and Citizen’s United.
    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/01/16/stephen-colbert-pac-parody_n_1206439.html
    “But one public figure has managed to pierce the veil of dullness to actually demonstrate — in an electrifying way — just how dangerous and corrupt the current system of political campaign financing has become.”

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