This Doesn’t Exist: The Kentucky Fried Chicken ‘Skinwich’

Perhaps to mark the anniversary of the breadless KFC Double-Down Sandwich, this week saw the introduction of the ultimate in cardiac nose-thumbing cuisine: the KFC Skinwich. Composed of five layers of fried chicken skin (original recipe), bacon, and bun, the Skinwich seemed too good, or gross, to be true.

Chicago Trib food writer Monica Eng sensed something fishy about the Skinwich, and checked with KFC to see if they really were testing out the Skinwich. While the myocardial munchie really existed for a brief, beautiful moment in the hands of Brain Residue’s hoaxters, it is not an official KFC offering.

Eng reports that KFC spokesman Rick Maynard was a good sport about it:

KFC spokesman Rick Maynard has some bad news. Tonight he confirmed that the Skinwich was “just the result of someone having a little fun online.”

“While there is nothing like the taste of KFC’s Original Recipe,” Maynard wrote, “the best way to enjoy it is on a piece of KFC Original Recipe chicken.”

Even without KFC’s confirmation, Eng points out, Brain Residue’s backwards-coded list of Skinwich locations were a dead giveaway:

Ekaf, Maine — Colbert Blvd.

Tihsllub, Oklahoma — Corner of 3rd & Twain.

Eritas, California — Dense St.

KFC might want to rethink the Skinwich. Trib blogger Kevin Pang followed up Eng’s story by constructing his own Skinwich, and gave the product high marks. It’s a golden marketing opportunity, as well. Picture Ted Levine in an “It puts the eleven herbs and spices on its skin” commercial. Ditto Mike Myers, whose Goldmember character could resurrect his “That’s a keeper!” catchphrase.

I’m not sure what it says about America that the Skinwich is a hoax, but San Francisco’s proposed anti-Happy Meal law (already adopted in Santa Clara) is actually real. I’m all for clear labeling and high food safety standards, but as long as it’s legal, we should all have the freedom to choose what happens to our bodies.

This is an opinion piece. The views expressed in this article are those of just the author.