Look, we know that tabloid magazines lie. That’s a given. Even their most ardent fans don’t actually, deep down believe the stuff they’re reading. But there are some standards that should be kept. Standards like, I don’t know, the English language. That’s why this Gossip Cop story about OK! Magazine (they of the similarly ridiculous Jennifer Aniston pregnancy report) and their cover touting a “confirmed” pregnancy for Jessica Simpson is so insulting. The word “confirmed” kind of means something.

Well it’s official – John Mayer is a complete and total pig. A very quotable, jaw-droppingly honest, hilarious, fairly introspective pig. But a pig nonetheless.

He did a lengthy interview with Playboy in which he discussed his racist penis, having sex with Jessica Simpson, dropped an n-bomb and much much more. Here are some highlights. Update: Mayer has apologized.

US Weekly has really blown us away with their recent article, “EXCLUSIVE: Oops! Jessica Simpson Farts During Business Meeting.” Which, by the way, is filed under their “News” vertical. To maintain both dignity and professionalism, their source remained anonymous. But, boy, was the scoop a doozy.

The September Issue: it’s not just the title of the highly anticipated R.J Cutler documentary about Anna Wintour, its also what every magazine loving fashionista anxiously awaits, its hefty size a welcome antidote to the malnourished August issue. But judging from Elle’s September cover, which features Jennifer Aniston clad in black leather (last month anyone?), it’s beginning to look a lot like August.

From Bleacher Report: “As men we don’t ask for a lot. we want our beers to be cold, our seats to be comfortable, our wings to be hot, and our sports brought to us by beautiful women.” A Mediaite One-Act.