Finally. The war on reality television has begun.

While I’ve been trumpeting the need to exterminate this blot upon our culture for years, it wasn’t until today that things really started moving in earnest. First, we got word that President Obama was an enemy of the demonic Kardsashian clan, and now the hosts of The Five spent an entire segment discussing how the Jersey Shore‘s and Real Housewives of Hades‘ of the world are destroying our nation’s children.

Yes! Let the great cleansing begin!

Recently on an episode of Kate Plus Eight, Kate Gosselin freaked out over her babysitter’s handling of a pizza pie (because that’s a totally normal thing for someone to do). Last night on Anderson Cooper 360, Cooper absolutely demolished Gosselin over the ridiculous clip.

The real news here: Anderson Cooper watches Kate Plus Eight?

Mock it if you must as a coming together of reality show titans, but the stranger-than-fiction matchup of Kate Plus 8 star Kate Gosselin and Mama Grizzly Sarah Palin packed a proverbial punch in the ratings Sunday night, but perhaps not quite the knockout TLC had hoped for.

Highly hyped, the Gosselin visit pushed SPAlaska to 3.1 million viewers Sunday, an increase of 11 percent from the previous week–and not quite the showstopper that many were clearly expecting, says the Hollywood Reporter

Hey, all, do you remember Sarah Palin? I know it’s been awhile, but think back. Palin was John McCain’s running mate in 2008. Ah, now you remember. Well, as we all know, after the election, Palin vanished from public view which was truly too bad because she really seemed like an interesting character. Fortunately, TLC has announced that the famously spotlight-shunning former governor’s new TV show, Sarah Palin’s Alaska, will premiere this November. Finally we’ll get some Palin back in our lives!

Maybe it’s the suspenders.

Or maybe it’s the fact that this snazzy 75-year old shops at Juicy Couture, but for whatever the reason, “celebrity” douchebags alike think that Larry King can save them from their swift decline into official American public scum.

TLC announced Tuesday that their gold mine reality show “Jon & Kate Plus 8″ is dropping douche-bag dad Jon to become a terser “Kate Plus Eight.” No confirmation of whether Jon voluntarily made his exit, though it seems highly likely by the looks of his TLC announced yesterday that their gold mine reality show "Jon & Kate Plus 8" is dropping its douche-bag dad Jon to become a terser "Kate Plus Eight." No confirmation of whether Jon voluntarily made his exit, though it seems highly likely by the looks of his frequent Vegas romps frequent Las Vegas romps.