Looking Back On The GOP Debate And Cuba: Wrong Questions, ‘Right’ Answers

I’m from Miami and my background is Cuban, so I’m pretty much in line with the sort of voter (or, at least, the offspring of the sort of Cuban-born voter) that the Republican candidates were catering (and/or pandering) to when talk turned to Cuba during Monday night’s NBC debate.

So it’s with painful awareness that I admit to being fully aware that these four men aren’t generally very concerned about Cubans in the U.S. beyond recognizing that we’re a demographic they’d like on their side come election time. And that’s fine: Cubans aren’t exactly a huge, widely dispersed population in the U.S. According to the 2000 census, we represent only around 3.5 percent of the country’s Latino population. I mean, we’re awesome and probably the best of all people, ever, but there aren’t a whole lot of us. So if you’re going to pander, at least have it make some sort of sense, you know? Don’t make campaign promises that won’t eventually end up as a cable news segment about all the things you’ve failed to do throughout your presidency, no matter what side of the aisle you’re on.

Mitt Romney emerged from the debate unscathed, focusing on the work to be done with the future leadership of Cuba, and adding that President Barack Obama has gone down the wrong track where the island is concerned. It was the safe answer. Regardless of being good or bad or wrong or right, it was safe.

Now, his rival Newt Gingrich chose a far more hawkish course of action, telling debate moderator Brian Williams (after opining that Fidel Castro would go to hell, possibly while wearing a tutu and Che Guevara T-shirt ) that he’d advocate for a “very aggressive policy of reaching out to every single Cuban who would like to be free, helping network them together, reaching out to the younger generation inside the dictatorship” and using “appropriate covert operations to maximize the dissidence.” A Gingrich presidency, he said, will not stand for four more years of a Cuba under the Castros. Oh, ok.

Ron Paul rather Ron Paul-y said he’d pretty much take the exact opposite course of action, arguing that the U.S. has managed to prop Castro up for decades by providing him with a handy scapegoat and adding that it is “time to quit this isolation business of not talking to people.” If we open our doors to trade and discussion, he said, it’s less likely that Cubans would celebrate their new independence on their home turf instead of taking part of some sort of mass migration to the States. That will likely get a few grumbles from the walk-up window at La Carreta, but at least you know precisely where Paul stands on the issue, regardless of who happens to be in the audience.

Rick Santorum, meanwhile, received an… unusual question from Williams: If we had a lobby of, say, Chinese dissidents living in a state like Florida, would we have a trade policy with China that resembled our trade policy with Cuba? “Not if they were not 90 miles off our shore,” said Santorum. “This is an important doctrine of the United States to make sure our hemisphere and those who are close to us are folks that we can and should deal with.” He argued in favor of continuing sanctions until the tyrannical Castro brothers are gone. Cuba’s proximity to the U.S, he added, makes it important and it makes its case unique, particularly where Cuba’s more dangerous allies are concerned.

Ok, THIS QUESTION. Lord Jesus. Santorum was correct in what he implied with his response: Cubans are not a priority in any election simply by virtue of being Cuban (despite what we’ll tell you). Cuba is 90 miles from the tip of Key West. It can practically reach out and slap the U.S., especially with help from some of its more extroverted friends. Come on, BriWi!

This whole discussion was, truly, a waste of voters’ time. And will continue to be for a long time. It’s up to the media (and voters) to ask the right questions (“But what if Cubans were Chinese?” doesn’t count. By the way, tangential fun fact: There are Cubans of Chinese descent, too. Havana even has a Chinatown!) and politicians to give… not the “correct” answer, per se, but the realistic one. Regardless of your politics. Just be honest with the people you’re courting and don’t make promises you cannot realistically uphold as Commander in Chief. That’s all I ask. And, really, you don’t have to go on and on about Castro being a plasta de mierda who’ll burn in hell. It’s like an older uncle trying to Dougie for the benefit of his young nieces and nephews. I appreciate the effort, but it’s really unnecessary and just the slightest bit embarrassing. Thanks anyway, though.

Also? Do feel free to talk to us about the economy.

Have a look at their responses for yourself, via NBC:

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