Colbert Welcomes Hispanics to the White Race Under One Condition

 

On Tuesday night, Stephen Colbert used House Majority Leader Eric Cantor’s primary defeat as a jumping off point to discuss immigration reform and the GOP’s largely failed attempts to reach out to Hispanic voters. Since white men have historically supported Republicans more than any other group has, Colbert just needed to figure out how to make all Latino Americans identify as Caucasian and male.

As Colbert explained, the U.S. Census tells us that Hispanics are “voluntarily becoming white” by claiming to be both “Hispanic” and part of the “white” race. “I believe I speak for all white people when I say, ‘Welcome, trans-Caucasians,'” Colbert said. And he didn’t think whites should just allow Hispanics to join their ranks, but rather welcome anyone who is willing to identify that way.

And since Republicans are also struggling when it comes to the female vote, Colbert invited women to join him too, as long as they identify as male, “which of course is the white of genders.”

“Once everyone starts identifying as white males, conservatives can appeal to them by pointing out that they are under attack from the people they used to be,” Colbert concluded.

Watch video below, via Comedy Central:

[Photo via screengrab]

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