Gizoogle: We’ve peered into your dreams. We know that you’ve always wanted Snoop Dogg/Snoop Lion/Snoop Mammal to deliver the news on your favrizzle celebrizzle chefs. Thanks to the power of technology, y’all can know where they is n’ what tha fuck they’re up to on Da Braiser.
Jezebel: Not gonna get you a diamond ring. That sort of gift don’t mean anything. Wanna getcha somethin’ from the heart; something special, girl. It’s bacon in a box.
The Huffington Post: Research indicates that millions of years ago, our ancestors ate nothing but grass and leaves, which makes the cronut the pinnacle of human evolution — much like the antlers of a magnificent Irish elk.
Forbes: Scientists from the University of Reading in Great Britain have discovered that compounds in champagne can ” improve our spatial memory, which plays a role in navigation and the performance of complex tasks and calculations.” In other words, science has proven that bubbly makes you smarter, which is why you should totally get your friend drunk tonight before he takes the MCATs.
FoodBeast: Tomorrow, we shall set out on an epic journey for a cronut. Until then, make your own pale imitation of Dominique Ansel’s finest creation using Pillsbury tube dough, a fryolator, and your gnawing sense of inferiority.
LA Times: Well, it’s not Becks and Ramz opening a sports bar, but it’s close and it involves his frenemy: Mario Batali is opening a burger sports bar in Vegas. Please please please let this involve soccer riots somehow.
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