Today in Twitter Photos: Martha Stewart’s Asses, Kathleen Turner Roasts Gael Greene

Twitter is gifting us just the best photos today. But we’re sure you already knew that, scrolling mindlessly through your feeds while waiting for snow traffic to clear up. Sidebar: get off Twitter while driving. But in the event that you’ve been frolicking through the winter wonderland, savoring your humanity, and avoiding the interwebs, here’s what you’ve been missing.

1. Martha Stewart’s asses.

Christmas is coming! pic.twitter.com/0pIYeElMAE

— Martha Stewart (@MarthaStewart) December 17, 2013

2. Gael Greene is absolutely everything.

I asked Santa for a tall,handsome 50ish yr-old Elf who loves food and travel with nothing to do till next Christmas. pic.twitter.com/cb1uqkqpV7

— Gael Greene (@GaelGreene) December 17, 2013

Did we mention she was roasted by Kathleen Turner at her birthday party last night?

Kathleen Turner was clever emcee at my Big Birthday Roast&Toast lasngt.150 ate non-stop@Stella (advertiser). pic.twitter.com/6F6QGEbI5b

— Gael Greene (@GaelGreene) December 17, 2013

3. We’re playing a new game! It’s called “Eataly opening, Pope sighting, or One Direction concert.” Can you guess which this is?

Eataly is opening in Firenze! @Eataly_Ist @eataly @eatalyroma @eatalytorino @matteorenzi @OscarFarinetti @ pic.twitter.com/FsT6PbAmY8

— Nicola Farinetti (@NicolaFarinetti) December 17, 2013

4. Stephanie Izard of the future is flawless.

My uncle found this pic and said it reminded him of me…. Hopefully of me in 50 yrs;) pic.twitter.com/LCiG9j7Evd

— stephanie izard (@StephAndTheGoat) December 17, 2013

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