When Awful Explosive Diarrhea and a TV Show Called ‘Ultimate Slip ‘N Slide’ Collide

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In an apparent response by the universe to the eternal question “What could go wrong?”, an outbreak of “violent” illness that included “explosive diarrhea” has forced NBC to shut down production of a TV show called Ultimate Slip ‘N Slide.

Wait, you may be saying to yourself, they’re making a show called Ultimate Slip ‘N Slide?

The unbelievable answer to that is yes. Here’s how Deadline described the series when it was announced in May, and please control your giggling when you get to the “cornhole” part:

Ultimate Slip ‘N Slide is a reality competition take on Wham-O’s iconic 1960s outdoor game, which will see contestants compete in a series of challenges on the gigantic slippery slide.

Critical Content Makes Playdate With Toy Maker Wham-O, Kicking Off With ‘Slip ‘N Slide Island’ Competition Series
Featuring pairs of siblings, best friends, couples and co-workers, teams will compete in multiple rounds of games, including Human Pong, Body Bowling, Cornhole and Bocce Fall. The two teams that make it to the final challenge will take on the Big Slipper, a multi-part slide meant for only the bravest and boldest players as it determines who will earn the title of Slip ‘N Slide champion and take home the cash prize.

You may also be asking yourself “Why aren’t they doing a ‘literal shitshow’ gag?”, and the answer to that is we are way too classy an operation for that.

The Wrap now reports that production has been shut down due to the worst kind of slipping and sliding:

NBC’s “Ultimate Slip ‘N Slide” just became the ultimate s— show.

The upcoming TV competition series, adapted from the classic backyard waterslide by Wham-O, has shut down indefinitely after up to 40 crew members fell violently ill during production on a remote ranch in Simi Valley, California, TheWrap has learned. According to a person with knowledge of the production, the outbreak of “awful explosive diarrhea” left people “collapsing” on set and “being forced to run into port-o-potties.”

“Awful explosive diarrhea.”

As opposed to what, the soothing kind?

People Magazine got a statement:

Universal Television Alternative Studios -who is producing the show for NBC – gave a statement to PEOPLE.

“The health and safety of everyone on our set is our number one priority, so out of an abundance of caution we have made the decision to stop production of Ultimate Slip ‘N Slide at the current location,” the spokesperson said. “We are in the process of determining next steps in order to complete production.”

Probably some scrub brushes and a shit-tom of bleach would be a good start.