‘Who’s Donald Trump F**king?’ Bill Maher Takes On Yuge Question — Suggests Without Evidence Trump Is Victim of Stolen Erection

Comic and political pundit Bill Maher asked the age-old question that nobody really wants to think about — “Who’s Donald Trump fucking?” — and declared without evidence that “it’s not Melania,” but it must be an issue of erection integrity.

On Friday night’s edition of HBO’s Real Time with Bill Maher, host Bill Maher devoted his “New Rules” segment to cruelly mock the former president, wondering why none of the million Trump books reveal his sexual dalliances, and coming to a shameful and wholly speculative conclusion:

Someone needs to explain to me how there have been over 1200 books written about the Trump presidency. Books that were mostly competing to reveal every detail of his life. And not one of them tells me the one thing I’m most curious about. Who is Donald Trump fucking? He’s fucking somebody. And it’s not Melania and it’s not nobody. He’s a dog and always has been. And I doubt that went away after he became the most powerful man in the world.

How is it possible? I don’t have the answer to this question. Who is blowing Donald Trump. How could it be that if you read every page of Fire and Fury. Confidence Man. Team of Vipers. A very stable genius. Betrayal. Disloyal. Revenge. Unhinged. Rage. Fear. Peril. Blitz. Full disclosure. The Divider and The Room Where it Happened. You still have no idea what happened in the room. We know everything else about the guy down to the most minute detail because everyone around him as the loyalty of a pet scorpion. All White Houses are a bit of a sieve, but the Trump White House leaked more than Nick Cannon’s condoms.

…

Unless. No, it couldn’t be. Well, unless the answer, Donald, is you just can’t. I remember. I remember you once guaranteed that there was no problem. “I guarantee you there’s no problem. I guarantee.” Well, maybe there is. Maybe there is a problem. In which case I feel for you. No, I’m just saying, I’m not trying to bait you into a response to prove your dick works. Maybe it does. It is possible, theoretically, but.

But really, there’s no other explanation how a cult leader with hundreds of willing groupies is not restrained by his wife, by his options or by morals could not be having sex with anyone. I wouldn’t be surprised if you nicknamed your penis Mike Pence. Because it’s not hung like it should be. Anyway. Donald, I know you’re thinking about running again, so I just want to say good luck with the campaign. And now that your own party thinks of you as a loser, remember, no one wants a limp dick in the White House.

Watch the clip above via HBO.