Fox News Alert: Gretchen Carlson Doesn’t Have Fingerprints

Fox News’ Gretchen Carlson broke some truly shocking news about herself this afternoon: She does not have fingerprints. A close-up revealed the completely smooth finger pads, with no lines or ridges in sight. Luckily, she had two experts to help her figure out, as the graphic on screen read, “WHERE’D MY FINGERPRINT GO?”

Emergency room nurse practitioner Erin Tolbert and Fox tech expert Clayton Morris did their best to help Carlson figure out why she has so much trouble using biometric features like the new iPhone’s fingerprint sensor, let alone what would happen were she ever arrested.

Carlson told the story of how the TSA tried to take her prints for a global entry pass this past weekend, but came up empty-handed. “My children were horrified to fine out mommy has no fingerprints,” she said. Tolbert suggested that certain medications, specifically chemotherapy, can cause people to lose their fingerprints, but that didn’t explain Carlson’s problem.

“Could it be that people are losing their fingerprints because we’re constantly on our fingers, either typing now or on devices?” Carlson asked, to which the answer was “It’s possible.” She added that when the TSA told her they couldn’t read her fingerprints, she said, “I can become a burglar now, at which my daughter then cried.”

Watch video below, via Fox News:

[photo via screengrab]

— —

>> Follow Matt Wilstein (@TheMattWilstein) on Twitter

New: The Mediaite One-Sheet "Newsletter of Newsletters"
Your daily summary and analysis of what the many, many media newsletters are saying and reporting. Subscribe now!