Trump Goes On Rant About How His ‘Grass Guys’ Will Fix All The Parks

President Donald Trump went on a rant about the lifespan of grass, curb-breaking hammers, and the rampant problem of “little murders” during a dinner at the White House.

Trump spoke to a crowd of lawmakers and others at a dinner on his all-new Mar-a-lago-cized Rose Garden patio Friday night, weaving his way through a maze of topics like having his “a**” broken, “woke” snowflake Harry Truman, and this rant about grass. No, not that kind:

So we’re so proud of what? Because this is our nation’s capital.

Now we’re going to be coming to you for a small amount of money. We’re going to beautify Washington. We’re going to fix the roads, we’re going to fix the medians. We’re going to clean up the place. We’re going to put new grass in all the parks. You don’t know this. Grass has a life…

We have a life. It’s so long. Guess what? It expired about 40 years ago in these parks. There’s no grass on half of them. We’re going to re-grass ’em with the best guys in the country. We’re going to grass ’em by people that do Augusta in Georgia, people that do the great golf courses of the world, we are going to have the most beautiful parks. We’re going to fix the curbs. I noticed some of your curbs are broken. You know what? There’s hitting ’em with a hammer so they can pick it up and throw it at the police. But not anymore. They’re not anymore. So we have the safest place, Washington, dc and we’ll be going to other cities to help out. Preferably, we’d like to be asked, but in some cases that just won’t happen because they’re people that don’t understand the word ask and people that don’t understand they’re in trouble or they’re stupid, there’s something wrong with them.

But these are high crime areas. As high as there is in the world, you can go to Afghanistan, you can go to places that you think of are unsafe. You’re safer there than you are in Chicago at night. But we’re going to make Chicago like this. … we’re going to come into New Orleans and we’re going to make that place so safe. It’s got a little problem right now. A couple of headaches like murders, a lot of little murders going on, and we’re not going to stand for it. And we’re going to come in, we’re going to clean it up. You’re going to be safe within two weeks. That’s going to be the safest place. Just like this is the safest place.

And then we’ll be going elsewhere throughout the country. We’re going to bring crime down.

Watch above via C-SPAN.