Kimmel Eviscerates Ted Cruz on Eve of Basketball Showdown: ‘God Really Beat Him Up in a Very Vicious Way’

Ahead of their charity basketball game this Saturday, Jimmy Kimmel trolled Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) by speaking with a blobfish expert to learn more about him.

Over the past couple of weeks, Kimmel has been mercilessly mocking Cruz after the senator challenged him to a one-on-one basketball game for poking fun at his Houston Rockets fandom and comparing him to a blobfish in the process. Ultimately, after a lengthy humorous Twitter exchange, Kimmel agreed to meet him on the court.

So in order to “prepare” for the game, Kimmel sat down with a marine biologist in hopes of getting “insight” on his opponent.

“How fast is a blobfish?” Kimmel asked.

“Oh, very slow,” Dr. Sandy Trautwein responded. “Blobfish generally just hover over the ocean floor, spending as little energy as possible.”

“How long can a blobfish survive out of water on say a basketball court?” Kimmel wondered.

“Not very long at all,” Trautwein answered. “In fact, not at all.”

She confirmed to Kimmel that blobfish are incapable of “mastering basic basketball fundamentals” like blocking and free throw shooting. Trautwein also told him how blobflish has soft bones, very few muscles, and gelatinous flesh.

“That’s Ted alright!” Kimmel reacted. “I think I’ve learned everything I need to know.”

Kimmel urged his viewers who are in the Houston area this weekend to get tickets for the highly-anticipated sporting event.

“You know that Ted Cruz is three years younger than I am?” Kimmel informed his audience. “That’s right. God really beat him up in a very vicious way.”

Watch the clip above, via ABC.

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