Late Night Host Nukes Trump’s Entire Tariff Saga in 67 Seconds Flat

Late Night host Seth Meyers completely wrecked President Donald Trump’s weeks-long tariff saga in a stunning riff that lasted barely more than a minute.

After a disastrous week in the stock market, Trump tried to calm fears Wednesday morning by posting a message telling investors to relax and “BE COOL” — hours before he announced a 90-day “pause” on most of the tariffs that caused the market to tank.

While Trump aides and supporters chalked the episode up to a masterful negotiating strategy, Trump told reporters he made the move because “I thought that people were jumping a little bit out of line. They were getting yippy, you know, they were getting a little bit yippy, a little bit afraid.”

On Wednesday night’s edition of NBC’s Late Night with Seth Meyers, Meyers introduced a “Closer Look” segment on the debacle by drawing a deep breath and launching into a brief but surprisingly comprehensive recap, phrased in the form of a question:

SETH MEYERS: Guys. You are never going to believe this.

You know those tariffs Donald Trump announced last week that sent stock markets crashing and caused a global financial tailspin and sparked intense backlash from his own supporters on Wall Street and in the Republican Party and shattered American alliances and used made-up numbers and put tariffs on penguins and caused his own advisers to engage in a public war of words in which one of them called the other a moron and forced Trump to issue a statement telling everyone to be cool and hang tough, except he accidentally wrote the words, “Hank tough” — which sounds like the name of a fake adviser he would invent to blame for his stupid tariff plan. “Don’t blame me. Blame senior White House adviser Hank Tough and his buddy, the lemonade kingpin Mike Hard” — well, this might shock you, but today Trump paused most of those tariffs for 90 days, one day after his White House said he would not pause tariffs, and about two months after he announced then paused and announced then pause and announced tariffs on Canada and Mexico, then left them out of the tariff announcement, then said he wouldn’t pause them, then paused them?

Well, I mean, at least we’re two years into the Trump presidency, right? WHAT?! It’s only been 80 days?

All right, don’t freak out. Just be cool, everybody. Hank Tough. I mean, hang tough, damn it. Now, I’m doing it.

Watch above via NBC’s Late Night with Seth Meyers.