Glenn Beck: ‘Much To The Chagrin Of Half The Country, I’m Not Dying’

Today on his radio show, Glenn Beck updated listeners on his recent health problems. In typical tongue in cheek fashion, he started by announcing to “about half of the country” that “much to their chagrin, I am not dying.”

Right off the bat, Beck cleared up any doubts saying that he definitively does not have cancer and does not have MS. He also said that they believed his fiber issues were nonthreatening and that his vocal chord issues may just be a virus. After assuaging any fears for his life, Beck returned to the black humor to describe the many uncomfortable tests he had to go through.

“Let me tell you something. If you like MRIs- and who doesn’t? If you’ve experienced the splendor that is what I like to call ‘The Tube of Coffin-like Death,’ they make it even better if they’re doing an MRI on your head by and neck. It took me 90 minutes, I don’t know if anyone’s ever had that, if you have, right now you’re in the car or wherever you are going ‘Oh my gosh, that’s horrible!’ They make that whole coffin-like experience even better by putting your face in a cage.”

Yikes! Beck did promise that he has pictures and may put them up on The Blaze so that could be fun. Otherwise, we’re glad to hear it’s nothing too serious and we wish Beck a speedy recovery!

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